Dred arches a brow.
“She’s too important to be treated like some bunny I picked up at a bar! I will not indulge in meaningless sex like I used to, I’ve come too fucking far to go backwards.”
She holds up a hand. “What if what you heard Tally say and what she meant aren’t the same? She left pretty flustered, Flip. What if she does want you, but she’s scared to ask for that?”
I shake my head. “She doesn’t.”She can’t.“I have too much baggage.”
“Everyone has baggage. And what if she does want you, what then?” Dred repeats.
I swallow. “Her dad is my coach. We’re friends. It doesn’t matter what she thinks she wants. It’s literally the worst idea in the world. All our friends are interconnected. The risk is way too fucking high to even consider. I haven’t had a relationship ofsubstance since I was twenty and that ended horribly. I can’t afford to entertain these kinds of thoughts about Tally. I’ve known her since she was a teenager.”
The team has always looked out for her. Protected her. I’ve protected her.
“Do you disapprove of Hollis and Hammer, then?”
“No, but that’s different.” Although I suppose it was equally complicated. Hollis is twelve years older than Hammerandher dad’s best friend.
“Do you just want it to be different?” Dred presses.
I pinch the bridge of my nose. “You’re worse than my therapist!”
“You can pay me a hundred and fifty bucks an hour to ask you questions you already know the answers to, if it makes you feel better,” she offers cheekily, but her voice softens, and her expression shifts to empathy. “I understand that you have always had Tally’s safety in mind, and you’re probably reeling because you’ve been trying to keep her inside a space she doesn’t fit into anymore. It’s also clear that she hit you in a sore spot without realizing it, probably because she was nervous and babbling. I think this is less about the request coming out of left field and more about being afraid of what this could actually mean.”
I frown. “She’s off-limits.”
“She won’t be forever.” She squeezes my hand. “She’s had a thing for you for a long time. When Tally was a teenager, it was sweet. Now she’s an adult, and even if you don’t want it to change things, it does. We also both know you have two eyes in your head, and a heart in your chest, and you’re not immune to her.”
I shake my head as I move to the Battleship table. “I need to stay away from her, Dred. She needs time to come to her senses.”
CHAPTER 3
TALLY
“Three minutes and we’re on.” Arya does a full-body shimmy.
“We’re going to be amazing.” I shake out my hands and do a few deep knee bends. This showcase is worth twenty percent of our final mark this semester. It’s another step closer to where I want to be; a graduate on my way to becoming a professional dancer. Top performances tonight mean first choice of studio time in the beginning of semester two, which is huge, so I’m manifesting good things.
“We’ve got this.” Charles and I fist bump.
The rest of the ensemble echoes our excitement.
Tonight we’re performing a modernized, full ensemble version ofThe Nutcracker. Every performance is preparation for our final showcase of the year. In second semester, we’ll dance as part of a full-class ensemble like we are tonight, as well as with our troupe, plus a solo number.
That my dad is able to attend this time because the Terror doesn’t have a game tonight feels special. My mother has never missed a single performance. As a kid, she would even come to rehearsals when she could. She’s been my biggest supporter,always encouraging me to pursue my dreams. But it’s rare for my dad to make a performance work. I’m excited and nervous to have him here. I always want to make him proud.
I center myself as the current song ends and the other dance class exits to join us in the wings. I squeeze Arya and Charles’s hands before we leave the wings, the rest of the class falls into place around us on the stage.
I steal a glance at the sea of faces filling the theater. No seat is empty. I spot my parents with my brother and sister. Ties and Fenna both look bored, which is understandable since they’ve been dragged to countless performances over the years. The Babes are a few rows back, and my heart stutters and skips a beat as my gaze finds a group of the Terror guys as well. Even Flip is here, looking gorgeous and untouchable. He rejected me, but he still came to support me, which just proves he’s a great friend, and I’m an idiot for having asked him what I did.
The first notes of the song filter through the sound system as the lights come up, forcing me back into the moment. I’ll panic about Flip later.
But for now, I channel all my emotions into our routine as I move across the stage. This is my happy place, where I get to live in the music and tell a story with my body.
Charles steps in behind me, and his hands find my waist. We move as extensions of each other, synchronized and fluid as he lifts me and I float on air. We hold our position while Arya spins around us, and the rest of our troupe follows, a ribbon of graceful bodies twirling across the stage.
I count the beats, every muscle locked tight so Charles can maintain his balance as he spins, and every time we face the audience, my gaze catches briefly on Flip, whose eyes are fixed on me. My feet touch the ground again, and I leap across the stage, spinning as I weave through our troupe until I’m back in the center with Charles, converging for the final lift. He sets me on my feet and dips me backward, and I arcover his arm, the crown of my head nearly touching the stage as the final notes drift through the auditorium.
It always feels like it’s over too soon. We hold the pose for a count of four, chests heaving with exertion. The audience erupts in applause. I’m breathless and high on adrenaline as I join hands with Charles and Arya and the rest of the class, and we step forward to curtsy and bow.
