When I finally manage to pull away, I’m out of breath.
Amund’s gaze roves over me. “What was that?”
I stand on my tiptoes and whisper in his ear. “They almost saw us. I had to make it look convincing.”
My heart is pounding wildly as I inhale the slightly sweet scent of his sandalwood soap. For some reason, I want to grab Amund and kiss him again. And again. I’ve made out with boys before, but it never felt likethis.
In the glow of the northern lights, I study Amund’s chiseled features. Until recently, he was hunting me, so why do I feel safe with him?He represents everything about the reason why I swore off dating in the first place. I look at all the couples around us.
Loving someone is… dangerous. It allows them to hurt you.
That’s why I swore not to give my heart to anyone.
And yet, I close the distance between us, searching his face as if I can find answers there. He reaches for me and rests his hand on my cheek. Despite his strength, Amund is surprisingly gentle as he caresses my skin. I lean into his touch, savoring the feel of his rough calluses from his tireless training.
The moment stretches out between us, too long and not long enough—
Realization strikes me like a match.
How many berserkir has he hurt with those hands?
Even worse: Aren’t I doing exactly what Mom did? Caring about someone who can hurt me?
I can’t. I can’t do this.
Amund isn’t safe. He never will be. I need to remember that.
Taking a step back, I wall myself off from him. “I’m sorry, I should go. It’s getting late.”
“Right, of course,” Amund says, but he looks disappointed. “Can I walk you back?”
I shake my head. “I’ll be fine. You should keep an eye on Isaac, right?”
“Right.” He nods, but the crease between his brows remains. “I’ll see you Thursday, then.”
“See you,” I say noncommittally before running down the stairs.
I hurry toward the berserkr campus. The thought of being in a relationship has never even crossed my mind… until now. And that might be the scariest thing about Amund. How easily I could see myself actually caring about him.
Maybe working with him is a mistake after all.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOURAMUND
After class ends on Thursday, I remain on the training grounds for a different reason than usual. Pacing back and forth, I’m getting worried. The clock has already chimed twice, and Edith still hasn’t shown up for training. Is she avoiding me after what happened at the tower?
My mind wanders back to our kiss. I nearly miss a step, recalling how warm and soft her lips were. Softer than I would’ve ever imagined. Until then I’d never been kissed before. At first I didn’t know what to do, but then instinct took over.
Edith made it clear it was meaningless, just a way to hide from Isaac. After she left, I ensured that her friend Tala was safe. When I finally finished patrol, I returned to my room for a restless night. Yesterday was no better. Another day of distraction.
All I could think about was seeing Edith today.
Clearing my throat, I place my spear in the rack. The later it gets, the more my worries grow. Should I go looking for her? Or would she want me to give her space? What if she’s in danger? What if—
“Waiting for Daddie Dearest?” Val asks, striding over to me.
“No. Someone else.”
“Oh?” That seems to interest her. She leans against her spear with that mischievous look she often gets. “Who might that be?”
