“Are you okay?” Noah asks, squeezing my arm.
I connect my eyes back to his, in an attempt to calm myself down.
“It’s justa lot,” I admit.
He huffs out a slight laugh. “Yeah, it really is.”
I look down at my other hand still locked in his. “Kevin knows.”
Noah nods his head. “Yeah, Kevin knows.”
“But Veronica doesn’t know yet?” I ask.
Noah shakes his head. “Unless you confront him, I can’t see why he’d tell my mom. They can keep living in their blissful affair, for all he cares.”
I nod my head, letting the information filter through. This is really happening. The truth is slipping between the cracks and soon, it’ll all rush out like a flooded dam.
There’s no stopping this. Veronica is going to learn about Noah and I, whether it’s on my terms or not.
But, right now, the only thing that scares me more is losing Noah and right now, I’m not sure where we stand.
What is there to confess if there’s nothing left?
“Noah,” I open my mouth.
“Brad,” He grabs my hand, and pulls it close to his chest. “Outing someone is incredibly dangerous, and the fact that he’s not only willing to sleep with your fiancé, butoutyou in the process, is heinous. You should be theonly onewho gets to decide when you come out.Youget to decide when the time is right…for you.” Noah, squeezes my hand firmly.
I close my eyes, really taking in his words. He’s not just talking about Kevin.
“I’m sorry for pressuring you.” Noah shakes his head. “If you aren’t ready, then that’s your business. I know this hasn't been easy for you either.”
I nod my head simply. But inside, I know enough is enough. I know where my feelings lie and I know they’re never going to change.
“No,” I take in a big breath. “Noah, I’m done. Done pretending there’s any other endgame for me. You’re all I want. You’re all I’lleverwant.” I lift his chin so he looks me right in the eyes as I say it. “I knew it the day I met you.”
Noah sucks in a breath, standing up from his seat. “You need to think about this? We can take some time.”
I shake my head. “No. No more thinking. Not when I already know.”
I see a sparkle in his eyes as he studies my face. He’s scared I’ll change my mind. Maybe that’s why he’s been running so much.
Noah slips off the seat and instinctively, I grab onto his arm. The fear of not seeing him again courses through my body. No, I can’t stand it. I need him close.
As though he can hear my thoughts, he immediately soothes my inner demons.
“Don’t worry. I’m standing up because I’m coming to join you.” He smiles softly, rubbing my hand. “I won’t run away from you, Brad. I’m so sorry that I did before. I’ll work on that.”
My shoulders relax. I didn’t realize how much I needed to hear him say that. I loosen my grip on his arm and spread my legs so he can step between them. Grabbing my face in his hands, he places a tender kiss on my lips.
“I love you,” he mutters softly.
“I love you.” I pull him in for another kiss.
I love him even though I’m not ‘supposed to’. Even with secrets waiting to blow us wide open.
41
Brad
