I couldn’t be more interested if he offered me a lifetime supply of tacos, but I keep my response cool and breezy. “Okay, I’m in too.”
“Good,” he says, standing to his full height. “I was thinking I could be like your coach for the, uh, event, and you could be the eager-to-learn player.”
With a mock frown, I ask, “Is this some kind of kinky role-playing thing you’re into?”
Phoenix laughs and drops one eyelid into a wink. “Maybe. Now what’s next in your workout?”
“Weights,” I say, “starting with the bench press.”
He takes my hand and walks with me toward the back corner. “Cool. I’ll be your spotter.”
Oh goody. He’ll be standing over me with his penis right above my head. That won’t be distracting at all.
“This cheesesteak is amazing,” I say, holding the large sandwich in both hands as I sit across from my new agent. I signed with Kamryn Hart a few minutes ago, and now we’re celebrating over lunch.
“Best in Philly,” she replies. “Did the suit toss your fruit salad last night?”
Smirking, I say, “I feel like there’s a banana joke in theresomewhere.” Kam laughs and then lifts an eyebrow, still wanting an answer. I comply. “In contract language, an offer was presented, but the respondent deferred due to the petitioner being tipsy.”
She smiles. “Good for him. Drunk consent is not consent. And was a counteroffer initiated?”
“It was, and it was accepted by both parties.”
Kam looks pleased and raises her hand for a high five. “Hell yes, girl. Get you some.”
I smack her hand with my greasy one, barely able to process the fact that I’m high-fiving my agent regarding my deflowering. But Kamryn Hart is no regular agent. She’s obviously brilliant, but she’s also irreverent and hilarious.
“Now,” she says, pointing her sandwich at me, “let’s talk about your social media presence.”
A wince scrunches my nose. “I obviously belong in another generation because I suck at social media.”
Kam takes a bite and shakes her head. “No you don’t. What you’ve posted in the past is good; you just don’t do it often enough. I searched through your accounts, and you never post anything controversial, which is more than I can say for some celebrities.” She drifts a finger up and down toward me. “You’ve got that whole All-American, good girl thing going for you. Keep that up. Companies love it and will want you to represent them.”
“Got it,” I say, beginning to make notes on my phone as Kam continues.
“People seem to love the few video clips of you in action on the field. Do more of that too.”
“Okay, I have lots of videos I can share.” I type that into my notes app.
“And brands love when you wear their stuff where everyone can see it. It really ups your value to them and will make contract negotiations easier. Like, have someone video you running with your Jordie McNamara sneakers on. Take a five-second video of you putting on some Hale Cosmetics lip balm or drinking the sports drink you represent. Stuff like that.”
My head bobs up and down in understanding as I type that in and then look up at Kam. “Sure, that sounds easy enough.”
Her eyes narrow. “Make sure not to skimp on the personal stuff either. Your brother and brother-in-law are professional hockey players, right?”
“Yes, they both play for the Dallas Brewers.”
“Cool. Comment on their shit. Another thing I noticed, people really responded well when Miles would post pictures of you two together.”
My eyebrows furrow. “But we’re not together anymore.”
Kam shakes her head, dark hair swaying around her shoulders. “Doesn’t matter. People like even the hint of a relationship, especially if you’re vague and a little mysterious about it. You’re still friends, right?”
“Most definitely. We text a couple times a week.”
“Good. Roll with that. Comment on his pictures and reels. It doesn’t have to be anything profound, just say good luck or that you’re excited to watch him this season. Whatever.” She waves her napkin before dabbing her mouth with it. “I know you’re busy, but I want you to set aside twenty to thirty minutes a day to scroll social media and engage with some accounts, especially other athletes.”
“Like my brothers and Miles?”
