Milo smiled, nodding.
“That woman needs to be on the crime desk, but she won’t listen to me. Let’s be careful about using names in public places, though. Look, we both feel the same about people being outed in the press. This one is different, though, because it’s hard to argue that it’s not in the public interest, given he is the favourite for the top job when the PM steps down, which we know is going to happen next year. We just don’t have it from a reliable source, or any confirmation of a timeline.”
“And you want my opinion on that? Why aren’t you talking to your political journalists?”
“I already know what their answer will be. I want the opinion of someone I can trust with this, but who has no vested interest in it for their own career credentials.”
“I don’t think you’d like my answer.”
“Try me.”
“I don’t think anyone should be outed unless it’s to protect them, and even then it has to be a life or death situation. The world has an opinion about how we live our lives. Mostly people don’t care, or are indifferent. For others, they believe we should die. It can be hard enough to accept yourself. You shouldn’t have to share that with anyone else until you’re ready.”
“I had a feeling we’d be aligned,” said Patrick, smiling.
“Has anyone given you any evidence to prove it?”
“Nothing concrete, but there’s enough anecdotal evidence to warrant investigating further.”
“It might be worth doing that anyway.”
“What?” asked Patrick, looking shocked.
“If it’s true, then we’re not the only newspaper that suspects or is getting mystery phone calls. The other editors have far fewer scruples than you. If it turns out to be true,wouldn’t you want to be ready to give him a platform to tell his side... if he wants to, that is?”
Their food arrived at that moment. Milo had confit duck with a plum jus, hasselback potatoes, and greens. Patrick went for his usual rare steak.
His boss was such a lovely guy, and although his husband dying so young must have been awful, he was one of those men who didn’t do well on his own. Not that he needed looking after. Quite the opposite. He’d seen his boss lose some of himself, as he didn’t have someone to fuss over and worship anymore. He wondered if Patrick would ever be open to love again. He also wondered what that would be like, to have someone who was devoted to your happiness. He couldn’t imagine it.
“Can I ask you a personal question?” asked Milo.
“Of course.”
“Do you think you’ll ever be in a serious relationship again?”
Patrick frowned, but then there was a slight smile on his face.
“Or have you already met someone?” asked Milo.
“No, nothing like that. There is someone who could be... possible... but he’s not the serious type unfortunately, and I don’t do casual.”
“I assumed you’d be an all-or-nothing guy. Can I ask you something else, and tell me to piss off if it’s too personal?”
“I have a feeling what you’re going to ask, but go on.” Patrick smiled.
“How does the whole daddy thing work for you? I’ve only read it in books, and they’re mostly written by women, and it can feel formulaic. I always thought it was more nuanced than that.”
“It is,” said Patrick, looking unperturbed by Milo’s question. “You respond to what the boyneeds, not what the daddywants.That’s the most important thing. It’s always about them.”
“So, they don’t have to ask permission to go out, or have you text them reminding them to eat?”
“Some do that and have a full-time arrangement; others just keep the dynamic to the bedroom. Then there are a lot of variables in between those two extremes. You need to ask the boy what he needs, and be able to pick up on any cues when he’s too shy or embarrassed to say what he really wants.”
“I never thought of it like that. So in a way, the boy holds the power?”
“Exactly right, and anyone who thinks differently is not a real Daddy.”
Milo had more questions, but he didn’t want to risk upsetting his boss by reminding him of his late husband. He wondered who this new guy was Patrick seemed smitten by, even if he tried to brush it off as something he didn’t think would go anywhere. Milo hadn’t intended to ask that question at all, but he was curious about the dynamic. Given that he liked to be in complete control when he was in the bedroom, he wondered if that was his kink. He’d explored whether he was a Dom before, and knew that wasn’t him.
