Jason shook his head. He had no idea what was going on. His brain was coming up with so many scenarios. They weren’t moving to Liverpool. What the fuck was happening?
“Are you missing Patrick?”
That was like a gut punch. He felt his heart break even more. Patrick had promised he’d come back to him, but that had been almost a month ago, and he’d not heard anything.Now Grant was saying different things to what he’d said before. Jason wasn’t sure what was real anymore.
“That’s what I wanted,” said Grant, a satisfied grin on his face.
“What?”
“That pain on your face. I wanted you to feel what I felt when you destroyed everything we had.”
Jason was speechless.
“We had a wonderful life together, and because you werelonelywhen I was trying to build us a future, you took everything we had and fucked it up. And if that wasn’t enough, you would have left me for dead at the bottom of the stairs.”
“But . . . but you told me to leave.”
“Of course I did. I knew you didn’t love me anymore. Why would I force you to stay? All you had to do was be honest with me, Jason. Sneaking around all the time, behind my back. I loved you, for fuck’s sake. I would have given you the world. All this would have been dropped in an instant if you’d asked me to make a choice, but you didn’t. You caused this because of the choices you made. Actions have consequences.”
Jason couldn’t believe what he was hearing. His legs were shaking, and he couldn’t stop himself from sliding down the door so he was sitting on the floor.
“It took me years of watching you. I knew you’d run back to your brothers. I just monitored you, waiting for an opportunity. Then along came Patrick. I knew this one was different. It took time for you two to get closer, but it was worth it. That way, it would hurt even more.”
“Is that what this has all been about? You wanted to get revenge on me for leaving?”
“You broke my fucking heart, Jason,” Grant shouted. “Now you know how it feels. You can go. Have a nice life.”
Jason wasn’t sure what to say. His brain felt like it was on fire. He was being bombarded with so many emotions at oncethat he wasn’t sure what he was feeling. Anger at Grant for going to such lengths to hurt him. Relief that he didn’t have to leave his brothers behind. And could there be hope? Now Grant had got what he wanted. Could he go back to Patrick?
“I can hear you thinking from here, Jason. Let me make one thing clear. Yes, the slate is wiped clean with us. I’ve signed the divorce papers, but Patrick is off limits.”
“What?” His voice broke.
“Did you think I’d do all this so you could just run back into his arms? You can go off and find someone else. I won’t interfere with that. I have no problems with you finding a man to settle down with, like all your brothers have, but it won’t be Patrick. If you even think of going back to him, Jason, it won’t be a beating; I’ll end his life.”
Jason looked into Grant’s eyes. A man he’d once loved. He knew he’d hurt him, but for him to do this? It would have been less painful if Grant had just killed him. How could he ever be happy with someone else knowing his perfect man was out there and he couldn’t ever be with him? Grant may have said he still wanted Jason to settle down with a guy, but he knew that would never happen. It took Jason time to build trust with someone, and Grant knew that. Any man who came now would be compared to Patrick. His brothers were moving on with their lives, and Jason would be left alone, like he’d been since the day he was born.
CHAPTER 18
PATRICK
It was Sebastian and Charlie’s wedding day!
Before Patrick headed over to Sebastian’s, he had something to deal with. Charlie had stayed at the flat last night with his brothers and was leaving from there. Sebastian had his sister, brother-in-law, and nieces staying with him for his last night of freedom, which Patrick had always found to be a strange saying. You were marrying somebody you were in a committed relationship with. Why would there be a last night of freedom?
What Patrick was about to do was dangerous, he knew that, but he didn’t have a choice. The last month had been the hardest of his life since George died. It had felt like another loss, albeit different because he believed and hoped it wasn’t permanent. He didn’t know how Jason was feeling about anything because they’d both kept their distance. Sebastian had tried to probe into what had happened, but Patrick had refused to talk about it, not wanting to lie to his friend. Thankfully, Sebastian was so obsessed with giving Charlie the perfect wedding, it had been a great distraction. When Charlie had said Sebastian could, on this occasion, spend whatever he wanted, his friend may have gone a bit crazy.
They’d agreed on a neutral location. There was no way Patrick was doing this in a place Grant would have the upper hand, although he was a mobster without a conscience, so the location didn’t really matter if he wanted to do something. Still, it made Patrick feel marginally more comfortable.
He walked into the bistro in Covent Garden. He’d seen it before, but never been inside. The hostess showed him to his table. Patrick was five minutes early, but Grant was already waiting for him, wearing a suit and looking annoyingly handsome. He could see the appeal, but it was what was underneath that was ugly.
“Shall we order breakfast before we get started?” said Grant, shaking his hand.
“Sure,” replied Patrick.
“I know you don’t have long with the wedding today.”
“I still need to eat.”
