Its crass and obscene, the way my hand finds itself slipping beneath the waistband of my leggings, and my fingers gently brush over my clit, wet with need and arousal. I know it’s fucked up to be doing this right now, to be watching them, to be enjoying it, but it’s been so long since anything has made me feel this way. Actually, I don’t think I’veeverfelt like this before.I’ve never experienced a desire so strong and vital. It’s an ache—a physical need.
My eyes grow heavy as I chase ecstasy of my own, but I force them open to watch Natalia’s grip on Hudson’s head grow tighter, her legs tremble uncontrollably, and his movements become chaotic and fierce.
She’s chanting his name, telling him how good it feels, how close she is, and when she finally breaks, he whimpers again, like her climax is the most delectable taste he’s ever experienced.
Watching her cry out for him causes me to careen off the cliff of pleasure right along with her, my own orgasm barreling through me at the sound of their mixed moans and the sight of my step-dad kneeling between my best friend’s legs.
With my eyes screwed shut, I catch my breath as I float back down from the high. When I open them again, whatever trance had overcome me seems to be broken, and as I watch Hudson crawl his way up Natalia’s body, planting his lips on hers in a slow and intimate kiss, I come to the harsh realization of what I’ve just witnessed and what I’ve just done.
My face flushes with humiliation as I spin, moving as quickly as can be done in silence. I run back down the stairs—I’m always running, it feels—and out the front door before either of them can realize I was home in the first place, unsure of where the fuck to go.
I can only hope they didn’t see or hear me, and regardless, I don’t know how I’ll look either of them in the eye ever again.
CHAPTER FOUR
NATALIA
“Doyou think Ellie has been acting a little weird?” I ask, planting my palm against Hudson’s bare chest as I roll over and hike my thigh atop his.
His bicep bulges as he props his head on his arm and stares at the ceiling. “Maybe. She seems…quieter than normal, but she’s never been particularly talkative with me, so it’s hard to tell.”
He runs his knuckles up my spine with his spare hand, the caress soft and tender, as if he hadn’t had me bent in half and then pounded into me with enough force to shift the Earth while he called me a desperate slut just ten minutes ago.
I bite back a shiver at the memory, sparks igniting inside me again.
I’ve been attracted to Hudson since the first time I met him. I don’t normally go for older men, but he had this kind of haunted roughness that was accompanied by a gentle nature, and it was impossibly alluring, especially once I began getting to know him better.
I don’t think anyone who’s ever met me would describe me as being filtered or having shame. If I think something, I say it. If I want something, I go after it, but I don’t fuck around with married people. Once his divorce was finalized, however…it was harder to hold back. I couldn’t quite stop myself from flirting, and the heated glances only caught fire once Ellie moved in with him.
It became impossible to ignore that the attraction was mutual, because Hudson’s poker face is about as bad as mine. One late night after Ellie fell asleep, I quietly crept down the stairs with the intention of going back to my own place but found Hudson in the kitchen instead. I couldn’t stop myself from finally voicing my interest, and I was getting tired of beating around the bush. I told him to let me know if he ever decided to live a little.
The moment the sentence left my mouth, he was stalking across the room and planting his mouth on mine with enough ferocity to set my blood aflame. He ended up fucking me right on the kitchen counter before carrying me up to his room and fucking me again—with his hand over my mouth to muffle my moans for fear we’d wake my best friend sleeping in the next room.
As guilty as it made me feel, something about him choking me, muzzling me to keep me quiet, was so erotic, I came harder than I think I ever had in my life.
And that’s when I became addicted to Hudson Grant’s cock.
The guilt didn’t diminish, though. In fact, I think it’s getting worse. I don’t know how Ellie would react to finding out I’m fucking her step-dad, but I can’t imagine it would be good. It’s not like Hudson and I are dating; it’s only sex. Still, seeing the way she looks at him sometimes has me unsure of her reaction.
She’s never judged my sex life before, and I know she wouldn’t fault me for having a fling with someone older, or evena faculty member at our university. I know she doesn’t think of him as a father figure—not in the slightest—but something about their dynamic makes me think she wouldn’t react well to seeing us together.
He’s not wrong. Ellie is timid around him. She’s timid around most people, and it’s always for one of two reasons: she either doesn’t trust them, or she’s got a crush. Ninety-nine percent of the time, she’s untrusting, which is understandable, considering what she’s been through, but Iknowshe trusts Hudson. I know she feels safe with him, which is something rare for her. And the way she blushes when he calls her “darlin’” or the shy grin that pinches her cheeks when he does something thoughtful…I’m becoming increasingly convinced she might actually be crushing on her step-dad.
For all the betrayal she’s experienced in her life, I can’t imagine adding to it, but each time I’ve tried to get her to open up about her feelings, she shuts me down.
“What would you think if Ellie was also…into you?” I ponder aloud.
Hudson sighs, my cheek lifting with the movement of his chest. “Ellie isn’t into me. Not like that.”
“Hypothetically, if she was? How would it make you feel?” I tilt my head, finding his face.
His eyes flash with something I can’t quite trace. “I… Natalia…”
Then, it clicks, and I laugh. “You’re not going to make me jealous, Hudson. Nobody on this planet loves Ellie more than I do. She’s beautiful. Funny. Smart. Kind. I’d be offended if you weren’t attracted to her.”
He pops a brow. “Are you saying you’d want to…”
“I’m asking you.”
