The Indomnitus represented something Niko never had—family and freedom. And now, he’s been forced to watch his dreams be swallowed by the sea twice.
Grief clogs my throat, and for a moment, I’m not sure if its mine or his. I just know that when I crawl back to him, burrowing into his side, it is a comfort to both of us.
“I’m sorry for your ship.”
He doesn’t look at me, his jaw working for a long moment before he replies. “I don’t need your sorrow, Willa. I need your rage.”
Though his words are soft, I feel the ache lining them. The need for vengeance, for justice. All my life, it has felt like a bolt of lightning lodged in my chest, a physical demand that willnot be sated. In this, Niko and I are the same. Both monsters of the universe’s own making, honed by the cruelty of our circumstances.
We watch in silence as the last of the Indomnitus slips from sight, and the waves of the sea go still, as if in hallowed reverence for the grave they now hold.
Niko heaves a sigh, eyes dropping to where our fingers lay entwined. “It feels different this time.”
“What do you mean?”
He licks his lips as if he’s measuring his words. “The last time I watched my ship burn, it felt like the Aeternalis had stolen everything from me.” When he looks at me, his face is lined with an earnestness that nearly stops my heart in my chest. “But now…now, there is so much more to lose.”
Niko doesn’t need to explain, because I feel the same fear in the lining of my skin and the make of my bones.
“You killed him once. You can do it again.”
“No, Darling.” He frowns. “I can’t.”
I furrow my brow. “I mean…I know it will be harder to get close enough to him now, but—”
Niko shakes his head. “I could slice his head from his body and throw it into the sea, and it wouldn’t matter. He’s a Darling.”
“But…you already did it once. And you took your ship back from him. You’ve proved he’s not invincible.”
Niko’s expression is earnest, like he’s willing me to understand. His fingers tighten in mine. “There’s one last thing I need to tell you. And I need you to not hate me for it.”
My body goes cold with the wariness spiking through me. Just like when the Indomnitus sunk to the sea, it feels like there’s so much more to lose—so much that could break with one more well-aimed blow.
Niko inhales sharply. “Wendy spent a lot of time researching your family. She traced every line through the centuries, downto where it ended with you disappearing into the Amelioration camps.”
“Wendy?” I repeat faintly.
“Through her research, she learned a lot about the Darling curse.”
Wendy’s wild claim drifts back to me.I know your secrets because I share them.But she couldn’t have, as I watched the life leave her with my own eyes. Buried her with my own hands.
“My immortality?”
Niko rakes a hand through his hair, looking slightly sick. “You are not entirely immortal.”
I stare at him, absurd laughter bubbling in my throat.
“First born Darlings are all blessed with eternal life, but all magic comes with a cost, Willa. Yours…yours is that youcandie. But only by the hand of the one who loves you most.”
“What—what are you saying?”
Niko’s death flies into the air around him. “I was only able to kill Peter because I was pathetic enough to love my captor. And I did, Willa…I loved him truly. All I ever wanted as a child was to please him enough for him to love me back. But that love is long gone. I can do no more harm to him now, than I could to Wendy.”
“Wendy,” I repeat faintly, shaking my head. “This it—it isn’t true. She wasn’t immortal. Pankilledher. I saw it happen. And he doesn’t love anyone but himself.”
A rueful laugh scrapes from Niko. “His love may feel wrong to those of us who know it as it should be, but it still exists. It is obsessive and controlling and damaging, but it is just as powerful as any other. And in his own way…Peter loved Wendy.”
You have been taught that loves feels good, and so you did not recognize it when it hurt.
