This is home.
Eleven
Queen Emeline
Benedict rides ahead, but I’ve not let him out of my sight. Regardless of what he says, I don’t trust him.
He offered to ride to Northumbria to protect my mother until my return if I wished to ride to Mercia to inform King Beornwulf of my news.
But I kindly refused.
Although I am giving him the benefit of the doubt, that does not mean I’m going to be stupid. Benedict is still my brother’s spawn. And he has been locked away from society for most of his life, thanks to me. The odds are not in my favor, but I would rather have him in my sight than out so I can watch him.
Ulf hasn’t spoken a word, which, although the quiet has been nice, I know he’s upset that Skarth and I rekindled.
Guilt riddles me because all I seem to do is hurt him when all he seems to do is protect me.
Skarth rides in front, Ulf at the back, and I in the middle—a perfect metaphor of how our relationship stands.
Change must come, and this time, it’s for good. Everyone wants my kingdom and me; all I want is to give it away. I am done with all of this, and some five minutes ago, I decided that I don’t wish to be queen any longer. Once I find my children, I will relinquish my title and hand over the duties to someone else.
Who that person is, however, I do not know because this isn’t a gift. It’s a curse.
“We’re stopping to feed and rest,” Skarth suddenly says, surprising me.
I don’t bother arguing because by the hard set of his jaw, it’s apparent this isn’t optional.
Ulf doesn’t stop and rides off with haste.
I know he won’t be far away, but it seems he can’t bear to be near me.
Everything is just too much.
“Emeline, take a walk with me.”
Skarth dismounts his horse and offers me his hand.
Again, this isn’t optional.
The moment I slip my hand into his, a calm overcomes me that warrants my decision.
We walk in silence toward a heavily wooded area. Skarth wants privacy and to be away from prying ears.
He doesn’t let go of my hand as he turns to me once we are far enough away. “What’s the matter, hugrekki?”
“I did not realize my thoughts were that loud.” I try to make light of our dire circumstances, but Skarth isn’t having it.
“Emeline, what troubles you? Apart from the obvious,” he adds. “Our sons are okay.”
“Your faith is far stronger than mine.”
He gently draws me into his arms. “Our paths are set before we’re born. We are merely passengers.”
His words remind me of our meeting. It’s the clearest memory I have. I never anticipated how that encounter would change my life forevermore. We were fated from the moment we met.
And that is why I place my hand over his heart. “When this is done and over…I plan on abdicating. Nothing but heartache has followed us, my love, and for what? We find ourselves chasing our tails.”
“Emeline, you have fought so hard?—”
