“Have you gone to therapy to work through everything that happened to you when you were a child?” Alve asked.
“I’ve been a few times, but Tyler didn’t like that I needed time to decompress after, so once the insurance ran out each year, I stopped. I think it helped a little, but it was hard to get deep into anything knowing I would have to act normal when I got home.”
“Another reason to load Tyler into a catapult and launch him into the fucking sun.” Nathan kissed my forehead, his thumb stroking my cheek. “Go again if you think it will help. Between all of us, you’ll have unlimited mental health coverage.”
While I stewed, Alve purred, doing his best to quietly unravel my stress. It was a little ridiculous how well it worked.
“I imagine there’s a fair bit to work through regarding Tyler, too,” Leo said. “I’m cool with whatever you need to heal.”
Without the bond, I would’ve doubted that. Instead, I was faced with the sincerity he offered. Of course, it could changeonce I actually did get deep into healing, but at least he wasn’t upset at the mere idea.
“I go a lot,” Alve told me. “I’m not sure if you would be comfortable going to the same therapist as me, but she has others who are very highly rated at her practice.”
This wasn’t where I’d intended the conversation to go today. They were probably right, though. “I’ll take her information and look into it.”
“Maddie,” Jude said softly. I loved the way he said my name. “We’re in this for the long haul. We want you to take care of yourself so we can have a long, happy life together.”
I wanted that too.
“I’m sorry I came into this such a mess.”
“Honestly, you’re shockingly normal for the amount of bullshit you’ve been through,” Nathan told me, a teasing smile on his lips. “Plus, I’m a lifelong mess, and you still think I’m cute, right?”
He coaxed a small laugh out of me. “Definitely.”
Nathan wedged his arms under and behind me so he could hug me properly. “You had me from the first time we met. I know the shit-talking voices in our heads can be loud, but you tell those fuckers to shut up. No one gets to be mean to my girl, not even her. Got it?”
I kissed him, just a light brush, assuaging the need for connection in that moment. “Got it.”
“I’m stealing you for the day,” I told Madison over breakfast later that week. “I already cleared it with your boss.”
Alve blushed. “Coworker, but yes. Our staff is perfectly capable of checking over the arriving inventory to make sure all the boxes are there and you can go through it all tomorrow.”
“If you’re sure.” Madison turned back to me. “What are we doing today?”
I grinned. “Surprises. Unless you’re not cool with surprises, and then I can give you an itemized list.”
“I do love knowing the plan, but as long as you make sure I’m dressed appropriately I can trust you for the day.”
“No, I want you to be comfortable. If a list makes that better, then you’re getting a list.” I hopped out of my seat and scribbled bullet points for the day onto the magnetic notepad on Alve’s fridge.
1) Shopping to personalize the apartment
2) Beginner performance lessons at Les Bijoux
3) Lunch date
4) Pack trip to Leo’s show
I slid the paper over to her, watching her eyes flick down the list.
“Les Bijoux? Really? I didn’t know they did lessons.” She pressed the paper to her chest with a delighted smile. “Tyler would hate that so much.”
“I think the lessons are new, but that’s exactly why I picked it. He doesn’t get to dictate what you do anymore, I figured it would be fun for you to try out a few things.” Les Bijoux was one of the hottest shows on the strip—or at least that’s what their advertisements said—and combined burlesque and acrobatics.
“Is that safe if I might be pregnant? It’s probably still too early to do a test.”
“They said it would be fine when I called. They’re not doing anything strenuous, it’s just to give you a taste. And I double checked with Ava’s OB-GYN to see what they thought, and they said it should be fine, too.”
