I feelespeciallysexy when he undoes the zipper and glides his big hand underneath the thin fabric, groaning like my skin is the best aphrodisiac. He smooths it down my legs. I step out of it, still wearing my spiky combat boots. I found a vintage inspired set of baby blue panties to pair with the bra. They’re high rise and they were worth every cent of the small fortune I paid for them to see intense appreciation in Shadow’s eyes when he sees them.
He kisses me hungrily, hands scraping from my shoulders all the way down to my hips. He scoops me up and I lock my legs around his waist. He peels me away from the door and as soon as I’m free, I lower my arms and wrap them around his neck. It’s not enough. I want to touch, to feel, to trace every single bit of him. I caress his face, his kiss-swollen lips, his nose, his brow, before I run my fingers over his soft hair.
I kiss him with just as much desperation, which just about causes him to run into the wall instead of going through the open bedroom door.
“Shit. Fuck. Sorry.”
I open my eyes and find his glowing with happiness and heavy with desire, but underneath all of it is a beautiful look of calm that I saw at dinner tonight. It’s stronger than ever. The crinkles beside his eyes are extra deep because he’s grinning the biggest, goofy, most adorable, lovely smile.
“I have to apologize in advance for this.”
I don’t have time to ask what he means before he carries me to the bed and freefalls with me still wrapped around him. He catches himself, laughing softly, especially at the little shriek that I let out. I know he wouldn’t drop me or crush me. He surprised me.
The best surprise.
I take his hands in mine and stretch them out overhead like he had me at the door. I let my legs fall open, making space for him between them. I want to be flattened by him. I want every inch of me to be covered with every inch of him. All of our points anchored and tethered to each other.
My hips snap up, rolling along his waist, rocking into that hard bulge in his jeans. I’m a little desperate and maybe hit a little too hard. He gasps, then grunts, and finally groans.
“Fuck! Are you okay?”
“Yeah. More than.”
“Oh.” Me too.
I’ve felt so many crazy emotions over the past few days. Weeks, really, but especially since I came to his work with the butt plug. I’ve longed for him, ached for him, celebrated with him, felt newfound joy with him. I’ve been stressed and nervous, and I’ve hurt and cried with him. We’ve shared every emotion and all that intimacy. But I’ve never seen him totally naked. He always wears a t-shirt. I’ve touched him underneath it, but I crave to feel his body against mine. Skin against skin.
I want him so bad that I could probably come if he leaned down and blew on my clit.
I could grind against him, but I want to force myself to wait.
His hands shake as they bracket my face. He lowers his mouth and kisses along my jaw, down my throat, over to the bra. He licks me through the lace, then pushes it up and his hot mouth descends on my nipple without any barriers between us. My hands shoot off the bed, landing on his face as I curl into his beautiful, hot mouth.
“I want to taste you,” he whispers between kisses.
I know what he means.There. “If you do that, I’m going to come for sure.”
“Yeah. I want you to do that. On my tongue, all over my mouth. I want to know exactly what you taste like. I want to feel you come apart.”
My heart races, flips, and melts.
“I’d love that.” He was asking for my permission, and that warms me more than anything.
When he looks up at me, dark eyes sparkling, and gives me one of those rare smiles, I’mfinished. I’m so far gone for this man. It feels like I always have been. Soulmates are someone you meet and your energy aligns with them. It doesn’t have to be romantic. I’ve always felt connected by the fire, by the gift of life that he gave me, but I want to call it more, now that we’re no longer strangers.
I want to call him my soulmate in every way. In life. In my heart.
He kisses my belly and my hip, but when his fingers brush over my panties, he stops. He’s trembling, and not in thatI can’t wait to rip these off of you and make you scream my namekind of way.
“Shadow?” I rest my hand very gently between his shoulder blades.
“Sorry. I just… still get hung up in my fucking head. Sometimes I can’t believe that you want my hands on you. That you won’t get disgusted by the scars when you see them.”
“Will you look at me?” I could tilt his face up, but I want him to do it on his own. He does, with only a few seconds of hesitation. I see that same vulnerable, achingly innocent, haunted expression that he’s always had, but there’sunmistakable warmth glowing in the depths of his eyes. I want to soothe him and erase those doubts.
“Toxic thoughts, intrusive thoughts, all of that is bullshit. It’s okay to be shy or nervous, but all the other stuff isn’t true. After, if you want to take off your clothes, I’m going to touch you. All of you. I’m going to see you, kiss you, love every inch of your body. In case you didn’t hear at dinner, I belong to you now. And you to me.”
He exhales and the tension leaks out of him.
