It’s a beautiful night out, and while we eat and the boys laugh and joke, and occasionally Dad and Rita, and even Mom joins in on the laughter, I can almost believe that we didn’t grow up as a family so fractured that Mom hated Dad, and Dad was gone from us for years. We’re never going to be a normal family, but moments like this prove that we can still behappy.
That fills me with such joy that I take a chance and reach under the table. I find Shadow’s knee and give it a tight squeeze before I bring my hand back up to finish my burger.
I know it’s a terribly stupid thing to do, but after I finish eating, I slip my phone out of my bag and text Shadow something I have no business sending, especially not while we’re surrounded by family.
I literally hear his phone buzz in his pocket. I bite down on my lip as he takes it out, already half suspicious. His eyes widen after scanning the screen, and he quickly tucks it away. He has to clear his throat roughly, half choking, and I quickly thrust the rest of the milkshake in his direction. He downs it in big gulps, cheeks faintly flushed.
I’ve never seen anything so adorable as knowing that I flustered him with that text.
I think about it all the way home, as Mom drives us.
Honestly, the night wasn’t such a disaster.
I’m sad about Mom leaving tomorrow morning, but at the same time, I hope that she’ll let me talk her into moving to Seattle one day. If not, that’s okay. I’ll miss her, but we’ll videochat and text and call. I’m not going to shut her out again.
***
We’re almost back to Hart and my phone still hasn’t gone off with a response from Shadow. I turn it away to make sure Mom doesn’t get a look at the screen then read over the text again.
Me: I know I can’t ride home with you on your bike, but I’d rather be riding you anyway.
Shadow might not have texted me back, but I have another surprise for him.
Chapter 16
Shadow
My stomach hurts like a motherfucker, but it’s nerves again. Nerves and…desire. I’m fighting a battle that I can’t win. Hence, why I’m speeding across town from my place to Fawnie’s.
The cool wind and the growling bike between my thighs do little to distract me. In my defense, I don’t think any sane man would be able to get that video out of his head. While my sanity might be debatable, I have the kind of brain that remembers every single detail. I can play them back on demand, and I am. Right now. As I’m riding.
Behind my eyes, Fawnie sets up her phone on her dresser, I think. It was the right height. She saunters across the room, a teasing smile on her face that only grows more seductive as she lifts her arms overhead and slowly starts to dance to music only she can hear. As her body undulates, her hands sweep over her breasts beneath her blouse. They travel down to her waist, down to her hips making those sexy figure eight patterns, over her skirt, and then lower.
She slips her hose off from under the skirt, rolling them down, still managing to look ridiculously hot as she glides them down one leg and then the other. She makes stepping out of them look like an art form. She doesn’t even come close to falling on her face. After, she perches on the edge of the bed, tips her head back, and sighs.
She scooches back onto the bed, a little further, then a little more. More. She lets the tension grow, building, until she flops back, tents her knees, and parts her legs. Her skirt trickles back, so that her white panties with the soaked spot right in the center, are clearly visible.
She runs her hand over her seam, pressing the soaked fabric until it outlines her folds, but she doesn’t whimper until she pulls the cotton aside and brushes her fingers over her dewy bare skin.
If that’s not enough, the minx pops up on the bed, sticks her finger in her mouth, and sucks it clean. Her eyes shut tight and she makes a sound of sheer delight. She then grins like it’s the best joke in the world. She stands, goes to her phone, and puts her face right into it.
“See you soon,” she says and blows a kiss before the video ends.
Yeah.
What the fuck else was I supposed to do other than walk my ass straight outside and get on my bike?
My cock is harder than lead in my jeans. Now that I’m getting closer, I wish I could say that I’m having second thoughts, but I’m not.
I’m going to do thisagain.
It’s half wrong, because I know I’m doing it behind Preacher’s back, and half what Fawnie said it is. Private. Just for us because we deserve some privacy in order to figure things out.
It’s just so fucked up that there’s anything to figure. There wasn’t supposed to be. If I’d had an ounce of strength, I wouldn’thave shown up at her house the other night. I wouldn’t be heading over there right now, cock throbbing as my whole body pulses, wishing I was there in her bed with her topping me, riding my cock until I empty myself inside her.
The vows I took to my club brothers—still not enough.
My own common sense and code of honor?
