And those tingles. They intensified. Started at contact and radiated through the rest of my body. I licked my lips and took in a deep breath, telling him I was fine. His hand never moved; it stayed planted, making me want to feel him all over. I couldn’t stand it. How I couldn’tjust bewith him.
We made it to the smallest area of the property; the office and I walked in before him. Walking in, I was greeted by the head of construction, Louie, with a handshake and a professional hug. He started to go over where they were heading with the framework and I walked around with him, listening.
All the while, Crescent’s eyes stayed on me instead of on what Louie was talking about. His eye contact didn’t feel flirtatious or adoring. It felt intimidating and not in a good way. I could feel how annoyed he was with me and I didn’t like it. I wanted to lock eyes with him, snake my neck and ask him what the fuck he was looking at. That’s the type of vibe he gave off. But instead, I just ignored him, taking deep breaths every now and then.
The meeting didn’t last but about twenty minutes. We went over specs, flooring, measurements, and verified a few dates before it was time for me to go. Crescent was quiet the whole time. Hands stuffed into the pockets of his slacks, just there… just watching me.
“Alright,” I said with a deep breath once we made it back to the front of the building. “We’ll touch bases again in two weeks, Louie. Things are looking great.”
Louie smiled, looked between Crescent and I said, “Good, good. See you then, Mrs. Mills-Morris.”
“Um,” I paused. “Ms. Mills works fine.”
His eyebrows jumped a bit. “Okie doke, Ms. Mills.”
Once Louie walked off, I pivoted to face Crescent. I rolled my eyes and told him I would be in contact with him in a couple of days. He eyed me up and down, nodded, and walked off. I wanted to curse him out. Wanted to ask him why he was acting like that, but I decided against it. Crescent didn’t have to be nice to me. He didn’t have to show me great hospitality. I didn’t need conversation and good energy from him. All I needed for real was what I got. A good, respectable business exchange.
However, despite ending things, I wanted more. I wanted him to look at me the way he looked at me before. I wanted him to ask how I was doing and really give a fuck about my response. I wanted Crescent to be Crescenty toward me.
I was confused, right? I was a fucking mess, right? I should’ve been satisfied with the way things were. Should have held my head high and accepted his cold shoulder but it was hard to. I just… I wanted him to understand where I was coming from while also being Crescenty towards me. I didn’t like the cold shoulder. Hated how short he was with me. I couldn’t blame him though. I did play the back-and-forth game too many times. But that… it wasn’t completely my fault. I was at war with myself. In a constant battle of tug of war with my heart and my mind. It would have been absolutely amazing to indulge in him while in the middle of what I was going through but realistically, I couldn’t. I couldn’t give him all of me when I was still picking up the pieces, trying to put all of me together.
He looked over his shoulder at me, and I realized I hadn’t walked off.
I was still standing in the hallway, watching him as he walked away.
“You just gon’ stand there?” He asked.
I took a deep breath, gripped the handle to my purse and finally moved my feet. My shoulders were a bit slumped. My bottom lip was slightly extended. I felt sad. I looked sad. And it was because I was. But instead of showing him how much his attitude affected me, I cleared my throat, pushed my shoulders back, held my head high, and pulled that bottom lip in. I swayed my hips, putting a bit of pep in my step, and marched right by him. He huffed but those eyes fell on my round ass. I couldn’t see him, but I could feel him. I’d bet every dollar in my bank account that he was watching me. Despite the attitude, he was still under my trance and likely always would be. That’s why he was so gotdamn mad.
I marched out of the building, right up to my car. I didn’t look over my shoulder once, knowing he was there. When I pivoted to get into the car, our eyes locked and he shook his head. I gave him nothing; simply opened the car door, got inside, and pulled off shortly after.
24
DUKE
“I got approved.Going to grab the keys right now,” I said to Mahogany, who was standing in the laundry room, putting clothes into the dryer.
She glanced over at me. “Congratulations.”
I sucked my teeth. “Ain't shit to be congratulating me over. I’m just letting you know.”
She rolled her eyes. “Okay nigga. The fuck? You ain’t gotta tell me shit; just go.”
“You got some nerve, having an attitude with me like I didn't catch you with your ass tooted up for another nigga,” I said in a harsh whisper.
“Ducati please.Yougot some nerve expecting me to give a fuck when you got another fucking child. Fuck you,” she spat, a little too loud for my liking.
I looked over my shoulder. “Chill out. I don’t even know why I said shit to you anyway.”
“I don’t know neither.”
Instead of saying anything else, I walked out of the laundry room with a frown. Shit was still bad with us. Felt like it would be like that for the rest of my life. It was sad as hell, low key. Wehad a ton of history. We had witnessed each other at damn near every stage of our lives. Mahogany was my best friend. And I was losing that too. I hated what life had done to us.
On my way to the man-cave my phone rang. It was my ma. She had Diary.
“Yeah ma,” I answered. “Everything alright?”
“Yeah. You know she fitting in just right,” she said. “I’m just calling to make sure you know what you doin.”
