Jax laughs, kisses, licks, then draws his tongue up my slit like a fucking lollypop until he reaches my aching clit again.
My legs twitch, and with every tremor, I sense Jax’s grin broaden. I peek out from under the pillow to find his bright blue eyes focused on me. Heat flushes my cheeks,so I place the pillow back over my face and bite down harder to hide my moans. My thighs slap shut around his head as an undeniable high hits me, my back arching as he nips at my exposed, sensitive flesh.
I lift the pillow to see Jax propped up on his knees. My legs have fallen open and are now pressed against his hips. His brows are pulled together, and his jaw is locked as he looks down at the bulge in his pants. He wants to fuck me, but he sighs, falls beside me and kisses me firmly on the cheek.
“Fuck, Saya. I don’t know where to begin with you once we’re free.”
I squirm closer to him. “We’ll have access to protection when we reach the settlement. But I do enjoy your mouth between my legs.”
He chuckles. “The way you deliver that line with a straight face gets me going, baby.”
My brow twitches, but I bite my tongue. I don’t like the endearment—it feels too close to a label—but I don’t say anything. Whenever I do, we go around in circles, and in the end, I let it go because I understand when he says,“I need a piece of us that is real. I need to mean something to you.”
My hands slide down between us. As I reach the waistband of his pants, he seizes my wrists, then he draws them up and presses them against his chest.
Over his steady heart and warm skin.
Alive.
Relaxing his hands, he reaches out to touch my chest. Prickles of hair rise across my skin, and my heart stutters at his touch. “Your heart is the most attractive thing aboutyou. The way it flutters—your humanity.” He smiles, and my stomach clenches until it feels like butterflies are going to burst from my intestines. “And when we get out of here, I can’t wait to feel it once you see Kepler again, Saya.”
And then the bitterness surfaces. How would he react if I shattered my glamour? What would happen if he saw me as a monster? Bright red eyes, pointed ears, sharp fangs, and pale, almost icy, blue skin.
How would he react if he knew how I teeter between life and death?
To him, I’d be seen as nothing more than a nightwalker, hiding behind a human glamour, something my mum trained me to do when I was a toddler. A power that will only stay with me if I believe in a world of light.IfI believe that I am not one of the creatures that dwells in the dark, but someone like her: a vegodian.
“I haven’t seen the stars in a decade,” I murmur to break the silence I created. “Even though they symbolise mourning for Mother, I spent most of my nights in the vale admiring them.”
His eyes soften. “Well, aren’t you lucky? Eighteen hours of night will show you all the stars.”
My smile wavers. “Do you know why Mother left?”
Jax tucks a stray piece of blonde hair behind my ear. “It’s best not to dwell on it. Mother left Kepler, and now we have this. Thinking of her only makes us remember life before night.”
I lean in closer, savouring his warmth. “Alright, then. How are we getting out of here?” I shoot him a square look and add, “Also…Emily is interested.”
“She’ll just hold us back,” he mutters.
“And you believe Cole won’t?” I start biting at the skin around my thumb before I realise what I’m doing. “We’ll have to take it slow. If it doesn’t work out this time, I promised Cole we’d become the Praised again.”
“Saya,” he growls.
I close the gap between us, our noses touching, and whisper, “We can’t keep doing this. We’re getting weaker.I’mgetting weaker. But if I can get us back into the praised room, I’ll be strong enough to give it another go in a year.”
“A fuckingyear? Saya, you won’t last another fucking month!” He cradles my face. Calloused thumbs trace delicate paths along my cheekbones. “My priority is to get you the hell out of here—even if you’re kicking, screaming, and hating me every step of the way.”
“And Cole,” I add.
He smiles. “And Cole.”
“Don’t lie to me, Jax. My bunk buddy before Emily told everyone he cared for my brother, only to treat him differently behind my back. He thought I was asleep while he sat on my brother’s bed and told him he should die to make room for someone who could bleed.” My eyes narrow, and I look at Jax with a deadly gaze when I say, “When Jamie went back to sleep, I pressed a pillow to his face and suffocated him. Manni held him down for me. In the morning, we told the Bleeder he wasn’t feeling well. Since we were Praised, they believed us.”
Jax’s expression doesn’t change, and he runs his thumb along my cheekbone. “You’re very protective, aren’t you?”
“Yes. Which brings me to this,” I continue. “If itcomes down to saving my life or Cole’s, you save my brother. If you don’t, there will be nous.”
He leans in and kisses my forehead. “Alright. If I can’t save both of you, I’ll save Cole.”
