“Yeah, we’re at that point. Don’t you think? It’s time.” He’s wearing his thoughtful expression. I give him a smile of encouragement.
“I’m happy to give you as much time as you need. You know I’ll support you no matter what you decide.” I know how big this decision is for him.
“I am.” He looks relaxed and peaceful for once. It’s nice to see.
“Look, I can’t continue to monopolize you, Maddie bear. You deserve your own happy ending, and that’s never going to happen if we keep pretending we’re together. I love you too much to let that happen.” He squeezes my hand before getting up and walking towards the kitchen.
The last thing I’m interested in is dating, but that’s not something he needs to know. I’ve loved every second of our five-year “fake” relationship. I wince at the thought of being single again. No, thank you.
“I’m not ready to come out to the world yet, but I do want to come out to my friends and my dad. I’m exhausted, Mads. It’s this constant thing, always being vigilant about every little thing so I don’t give myself away. I hate that the only place I get to be real is here, with you.”
I can hear the emotional exhaustion in his voice. Hell, I’ve watched him live with it for years. The world of MMA, much like other male-dominated sports, isn’t a friendly place for anyone who isn’t a heterosexual male. My heart aches for him. It sucks that the world of professional sports is so full of toxic masculinity.
“I know, Kenz. I’m sorry people suck.”
He runs a hand through his short black hair, shrugging his shoulders.
“I know, Maddi bear. Not sure I would have made it through if it wasn’t for you. I love the shit out of you.” His warm brown eyes soften, full of all the love our 15-year friendship holds. He knows I’ll always have his back, just like he has mine.
“Back at ya, babe. Do you want me to be there when you talk to your dad?”
“I’m not sure. I keep wanting to tell him but it never seems like the right time.”
“It’ll happen when it’s time, Kenz. For what it’s worth, I think he’ll be fine with it.” I’m almost positive his dad will have no problem at all, but you never know because sometimes people surprise you. I head into the kitchen, grabbing a seat at the breakfast bar so we can continue our discussion.
“So how did the meeting with the hockey team go today?” he asks, while chopping up veggies for tonight’s dinner.
Kenji’s cooking is one of the best things about living here. I can cook, but he is just so much better at it. I’ve never been this fit, and that’s because I’ve been eating Kenji’s healthy food. He’s in the middle of training for another fight, so he’s meticulous about his diet. It’s like having your own personal chef. I’m certainly not going to say no to that.
“It was a-maz-ing. They want me to set up a program for their pre-season training that starts in a few weeks. Every morning during training, I’ll do a class at 9 am for the players. Joslyn Robertson is so cool. She was so down-to-earth. Asking me what poses would help her players with their flexibility and core strength. She even asked me about how to improve their mindset with meditation. You know I loved that question!”
I jump up from my chair, pacing back and forth, because I think better when I’m moving. This is the best-case scenario for my business, and my mind is swirling with ideas. Joslyn’s confidence was so inspiring to me. I loved seeing another businesswoman in action.
“Wow, Mads, that’s fantastic. Not only will it give you some remarkable exposure, but you’ll really be helping these guys. Hockey’s a tough sport. Lots of injuries. Yoga’s will really help with that. I love this for you.”
That’s my bestie. Always celebrating my wins.
“Thanks! I can hardly believe it myself.”
“So did you tell her about your brother and Liam?”
“She already knew. Apparently, Walker was the one to recommend me. Of course, he couldn’t call and tell me that himself, but whatever. Oh, and he’s headed back to Denver this year to play for the Wolves. He signed a three-year contract with them. Again, did not tell me. He seriously sucks at communicating.”
I roll my eyes in annoyance and affection. Little brothers are a thing. You love them and you definitely have their back, but they are incredibly annoying.
Kenji chuckles. He’s friends with my brother as well, so he’s had a front-row seat to our bickering since high school. He’s an only child, which means he thinks it’s funny. Me? Not so much.
“Well. I’m sure that will make Liam happy.”
“Oh, hey, that reminds me. I saw Liam today at the arena after my meeting. He was headed to his own meeting. I didn’t get a chance to tell him about Walker, but I’m sure he knows by now.”
“He always was a hottie. How’s he doing?”
“A hottie, huh? Well, he did look good. He’s bulked up a bit over the summer. Biceps for days.” I smile at the memory. Liam’s always been attractive. I had a huge crush on him in high school, but I knew the rules. You don’t date your brother’s best friend. He never noticed me anyway, so it hardly mattered how I felt.
“It’s been a while since we’ve all gotten together. Maybe we should have them over for dinner or something? Once Walker gets into town? He’s probably staying with Liam, anyway.”
“I’m sure. Remind me not to go over there. It’s gonna smell like sweaty socks and hockey gear. Yuck. Also, I had the same thought about dinner.” I love how well we know each other. “I’ll check with both of them on a date and get it set up.”
