“Yes,” I say, the word escaping immediately. I push one hand through my hair, keeping the other on the steering wheel. “I can’t really figure out how I feel about her.”
“Well, you’re attracted to her, aren’t you?”
I swallow all the protests that rise in my throat, giving favor instead to the truth. “Yes. Is it obvious?”
“Maybe only to me,” she says. “But I know how you usually look at women, and the way you look at Juniper is different.”
Crap. Is it? “Different how?”
“Usually your eyes just skip over women. On Juniper they linger.”
Well. I can’t argue with that. I also can’t believe I’m having this conversation with my sister.
“So if you’re attracted to her, that means you like her on some level, right?” she goes on.
“Yes,” I say, trying to quell my frustration with my weird brain. “But that’s not enough for me to go on.Likingher on some leveldoesn’t mean I should pursue her. So how do I know?”
“I don’t know,” Caroline says with a sigh. “You just…likeher. You miss her when she’s not around. You’re excited to see her. You want to take care of her.”
“But we argue all the time.”
“Well, do youlikearguing with her?”
I do. I really do.
“And is it really arguing? Or is itbickering? Because there’s a difference.”
“What’s the difference?”
“Bickering is petty back-and-forth stuff. Arguing is like, actualargumentsthat get heated or whatever.”
Our arguments do get heated, on a certain level—just not the way Caroline is probably thinking.
She doesn’t need to know that.
Another thought springs to mind, though, one that has my heart pumping with anxiety. “And what if—what if there’s something I’m keeping from her?”
“Hmm,” Caroline says. It’s not even a full word, but I can tell she’s dying to know.
“I’m not going to tell you,” I say, my voice gruff. “Don’t bother asking.”
When she answers, she sounds surlier than normal. “Fine. Is it something big?”
“Kind of.” I swallow. “Yes.”
“Will it change her opinion of you?”
“Possibly.” A few weeks ago I would have given a definiteyesto that question, but I’m not so sure now.
“Then you absolutely cannot pursue her until you tell her. Under any circumstances.”
My heart sinks to hear herconfirming the thought that’s been peeking around the corners in my mind. “Yeah,” I say, my voice heavy. “Okay.” I pause and then add, “Thanks.”
“Of course,” she says cheerfully. “This is what sisters are for.”
“Really? Because I seem to recall you telling me one time that your primary role in my life was to keep me humble,” I say.
“Well, that too,” she says. “Let me know how it goes. And by that I mean, let me know if you feel like sharing more details. There are questions I’mdyingto ask.”
