A handwritten letter to me from the man who I always thought truly loved me, until I found out why he left at the fair. When all my dirty laundry came spilling out in front of hundreds of people surrounding us.
With shaky hands and a breath held in, I open the letter.
To Mabel, Firefly…
Fuck, I don’t even know what to call you.
I just want to start this letter by saying I’m sorry.
I’m so sorry I let someone so insignificant ruin our life together, our dream.
After all these years and time, to have you back in my life feels nothing short of a miracle, especially after I know what I’ve done.
Thirteen years is a lifetime in some ways and yet when I’m with you, that time apart always vanishes when we’re together.
The calmness returns like a blanket covering me completely and those voices I’ve had for so long just disappear.
The connection we share has never faded, even after all this time and damage, it was simply waiting for us to find each other again.
Since I turned back up on your porch, I’ve felt my heart come alive in a way I almost forgot was possible. Every conversation, every smile, every time we lock eyes feels both so new and familiar. It’s been like rediscovering my favourite song.
You are the piece of my heart that I know I’ve been missing all along.
Life cruelly took us on different paths and perhaps we needed that time to grow into who we are today. You’ve lived in my thoughts, every day, always there, like I never left.
To see you again, to hear your voice again, to share laughter and stories feels like the universe has granted me a gift I never stopped hoping for. I believe with all my heart we we’re always meant to find our way back to one another.
What we have is rare, something that even distance or time could not erase.
What I feel now is not just nostalgia, it is something deeper, richer and stronger than before. We are not the same people we were back then. We are wiser, stronger and shaped by all that we have had to endure without the other by their side.
And yet through all the pain, through all that time I was away, my heart recognizes you instantly, as if it has been waiting for every moment Ihave gotten to spend with you and love you.
Mabel, I want to cherish every moment with you. I want you to know how sorry I am, I’m so sorry I let someone come in the way of that. I want to fix this, fix us and fix the family unit that I so desperately want.
I want you and Ellie in my life; I want to be her dad. I want to be your husband and protector. I want to be the one to show you what love truly means and to show up night and day for you and Ellie. To learn more about both of you and who you are now while holding close the thread that has always bound us to each other.
You are my past, my present and I hope with everything I have, my future.
I hope you can find it in yourself to forgive me.
I’ll be at McCoy’s tonight, waiting for you.
If you don’t want to come, then I have my answer.
All my love, forever yours.
Maverick x
Silence.
It isn’t often that I don’t know what to say, or that someone knows how to stun me into silence.
But Maverick Bennet always knew how to.
And still does.
Looking down at my watch, blanket still lying on the floor I notice the time being almost six forty-five; I need to movenow.
