“You can write here,” he called after her. “If I am reading or writing in the library, I mean. I do not mind your quiet company, if I am at work on something. This collection is rather small compared to Pemberley, but you ought to sit here whenever you like. I promised the library was open to you. Unless you need privacy to record your thoughts?”
His thoughts were rather disordered. Was he just ill at ease with the mention of his sister? Or was he nervous around her because of the way she had embraced him? She did not know whether to be charmed by that or distressed that she had distressed him. Flutters danced in her stomach at him wanting her company.
“I am not recording secret thoughts,” she said, smiling. “Just an accounting of my day, where I went, what I wore, what I spent, whom I saw.”
“How you felt?”
“Yes.” Her voice shook a little. She always made some reflections about what she felt, her impressions, her hopes. What would she record about today? That she embraced her husband for the first time, felt rather overcome by both his kindness and the feel of his arms around her? That being that close to him made her wonder about kissing him?
“I hate to think what you recorded the day you met me,” he said, grinning.
She laughed, enjoying his ability to laugh at himself. She guessed he allowed few people to laugh at him. “I am afraid it was not a favourable accounting of you. I think that entry reads something like, ‘Attended a benefit concert with my sisters, saw Miss Darcy and met her rude brother, wore my yellow satin with short sleeves, was called tolerable by a handsome but disagreeably proud man who dislikes my family.’”
He laughed a little as he bent his head, his cheeks slightly pink, and she grinned at provoking him. He was less proud and disagreeable than he had been, and she was glad he did not seem offended. She went to retrieve her journal when he called after her, “That entry was more favourable to me than you think.”
“You mean because I did not call you worse? There are other words I might have used.”
“No, because you called me handsome.”
She blushed and tried not to run from the room. Darcywashandsome and was even more so because he did not carry himself with the assurance of a man who knew every female head would turn towardhim. It must have been the hug and notions about kissing him that made her admit it.
Darcy would be the only man she would kiss for the rest of her life. The only man to take to her bed—and she had hugged him for the first time today. He might not be inclined to hurry them along, but she would offer herself at some point. Maybe he was not in a hurry since his feelings were not engaged, and they might never be.
That was a disappointing thought. She thought highly of Darcy—she greatly esteemed him. Now she wondered if the adage of love coming after marriage could be true. It felt it could be. It no longer felt impossible. He clearly liked her and respected her.
But could his feelings for her ever lead to a stronger affection? She envisioned his arms wound around her again, holding her even more tightly against him, whispering some nothings of affection into her ear before pressing his lips to hers.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Isuppose you have been occupied with wedding visits, Mrs Darcy?” Darcy heard Mrs Ballston ask his wife amid the ladies’ chatter.
“Of course she has,” answered Miss Bingley before Elizabeth could answer. It seemed to him that Elizabeth was getting along well with the prominent Mrs Ballston and her daughters, and Miss Bingley took that as a personal affront. “I daresay she has not taken the time to do a single useful thing. I despair for the state of her household and her workbasket.”
Darcy played cards with the men on the other side of Mrs Hurst’s drawing room and called over, “Mrs Darcy has neglected nothing, I assure you. My domestic felicity has never been greater.”
He shared a look with Elizabeth that told him she wanted to dump her glass over Miss Bingley’s head, but she was too well-behaved to do it. He could not blame her. After returning from Hertfordshire, Bingley had asked his sister, Mrs Hurst, to welcome them for an evening party. It allowed them to circulate amongst many of his friends and for his wife to be on display. He was glad for Bingley to know his wife, but Miss Bingley’s behaviour was bordering on uncivil.
Thankfully, Mrs Ballston appeared to approve of Elizabeth, andwomen like her were far more influential than a supercilious and insecure woman like Miss Bingley. It was not impossible that between a few important women’s approval and his wife’s own powers of conversation and charm that he would finally stop hearing the Darcy name whispered about.
“You seem not merely happy with your wife, but proud,” said Miss Ballston kindly. He had supposed that Mrs Ballston had once hoped for an alliance between them, but if either was disappointed, they did not treat Elizabeth unfairly because of it.
“Yes, Mr Darcy has the air of congratulating himself on having found such a woman in Ramsgate,” said Miss Bingley.
Bingley’s sister clearly still harboured regret on that score. She had not meant her remark as a compliment, but he would take it as one. “I recommend everyone go to the seaside to find a worthy spouse.”
“I suppose you have few friends of your own in town?” Mrs Hurst asked Elizabeth.
“My aunt and uncle will return soon, but aside from them, I have no other friends who live in town. However, some families near Meryton will come for the winter, and I will renew my acquaintance with them.”
“I could secure you some of the best society in town,” said Miss Bingley. “A line from me would bring you a host of acquaintance.”
Darcy watched Elizabeth’s eyes rise into her forehead, and he awaited her scathing reproof. She restrained herself, however, and only thanked her coolly and refused to be of any trouble to her. As though Mrs Darcy needed Miss Bingley to introduce her to the world. A woman of Mrs Ballston’s standing and age would be a better one to do that, but to him it appeared that Elizabeth was managing London society perfectly well.
And then, to prevent further outrage and indignation, Elizabeth changed the subject and spoke to Mrs Ballston about her daughters’ musical talents. He had a great admiration for Elizabeth’s faculties in conversation. She gave attention and respect, was lively and appeared interested in everyone’s concerns. He always struggled to do that, especially with strangers. She was a little arch, but always kind.
He felt proud indeed to call such a worthy woman his wife.
Miss Bingley rose and came near to the card table to see how the game progressed. “How I feel for you, Mr Darcy, on receiving so many wedding visits,” she murmured. “Such an awkward ceremony, and a man must be all grace to acquit himself through it. It must be all the worse, given the suddenness of your marriage and the added curiosity about your wife. I am sure you are managing beautifully.”
