She had not asked to see his room on her tour with Reynolds. She did not even know where he passed his leisure time when he was not in the library or the dining room.
But if they were going to have a steady friendship, one with trust and companionship, surely they would spend more time together. There was a heartfelt pleasure in the idea of getting to know him. “I promise. Indeed, everything is charming. There is very little to modernise.”
“Do you want a new instrument in the music room?” he asked in a subdued voice. “I had thought of replacing it next year with the expectation that my sister would spend more time at Pemberley.” He looked toward the mantel and gazed at Georgiana’s miniature again. She could not see his face, but the set of his shoulders fell, and she heard him sigh.
She rose, about to put an arm around him, but stopped. Theirs wasnot a relationship that had casual touches or embraces of comfort and affection. Friends might comfort one another, but he must feel they were not there yet. Besides, if he shirked her offer, the rejection would be painful.
Darcy then shook off his sadness and turned round, clearly surprised that she was now standing and near to him. “If you think it ought to be replaced, do not mind the cost, because I was already considering it.”
“She has not died, you know,” she said gently. “You could still have a relationship with her.”
A soft expression filled his eyes. “You are kind to cheer me, but in a way, she has. Georgiana made choices I cannot respect, and my character is compromised if I accept her in my life, especially since her husband could harm us.”
“She had every opportunity and every reason to come home with you. You were kinder to her than most brothers would be.”
“Because I did not shoot him and haul her away over my shoulder?” he asked. “Despite what he is, murder is not in my nature, and nothing short of that would have kept her from him. Sadly, she had every right to consent to the marriage.”
How appalling that the law said a girl of only twelve could consent to marry. But Darcy took much of the blame onto himself. “Her choice is not your fault, you know.”
“Is it not?” His tone was quiet but bleak. “She was in my care. I hired Mrs Younge. I allowed her to stay in Ramsgate. I could not convince her to leave him. I treated her as a child, which drove her toward someone who told her she was not.”
“No, Wickham preyed upon her,” she insisted. “She was determined to marry no matter what anyone said, and I doubt you were more controlling than any good parent. And she ignored every reason we gave her to leave him. Her bad choices and his wickedness are not a reflection of you any more than Lydia’s flirting and my mother’s gossiping are of me.”
He crossed his arms over his chest, seeming to draw further into himself. “It is not as though I must hold her at a distance because I findher husband to be a bore or a sycophant. I could endure that, and I could even endure her eloping if she had chosen a decent man.”
“I know,” she assured him. Or rather, she heartily believed him because she saw how he loved his sister and cared for his family.
“He is prone to vice,” Darcy went on, “he lies, and his running after women will result in the loss of his nose, the total destruction of his health, and my sister’s too.”
“And that is not your fault, either, especially since you made it clear that you would bring her home if she ever leaves him. What other brother would accept that scandal to keep his sister safe?” He was silent, likely feeling all the pain of his foolish sister’s choices. “In time, when you are less disappointed, when she has time to understand the consequences, you might reconcile with her.”
“He is never welcome here, and neither is she if she stays by him. I will give them nothing unless he sues me and the courts force me to. Are we in agreement on that?”
Elizabeth agreed, but sighed. “You may be right, but that is so hard.”
“Doing what is right is not always easy. I cannot condone his behaviour or her support of him. And he would exploit any kindness we show her.” Darcy looked like remorse oppressed his heart. “My parents would be appalled that I let this happen.”
“Her choice, her mistake, is not your fault.” She touched his wrist gently in a reassuring gesture. Had she walked nearer while they talked? Darcy did not pull away, and met her eyes with a look of question. When was the last time anyone had comforted Darcy? She smiled and put a little more pressure in her touch for emphasis.
He returned her smile, but uncrossed his arms and stepped away. “I hear your words, but I am afraid I am not ready for them to enter my heart.”
Darcy bowed and left, and Elizabeth hoped he took some consolation from them.
It occurred to her that Darcy was someone whose good opinion mattered to her. He spoke to her as an equal and listened to her. Not every husband treated his wife that way, not even her own father. Shemight not know Darcy well, but she respected him and wanted him to respect her in return.
And for his sake, she wanted to repair his relationship with Georgiana. Her desire to ease Darcy’s mind and reunite him with his sister could be because it was only rational to want to help the person she now lived with. Her happiness would be improved if Darcy was happier.
But Elizabeth felt it was as much because he had come into this room to find her and ask if they could be friends.
CHAPTER NINE
When the footman told him that his cousin’s carriage was seen turning in at the lodge, Darcy went to find Elizabeth. She was writing in her journal in his father’s room as she had done daily since they arrived. If the room was to be a favourite of hers, he supposed he would have to think of it as his wife’s room.
He had awife.
He had been married one week, and it still bewildered him. It had not been a complete surprise that they had to marry, but the full realisation of having another person live alongside him often caught Darcy unawares. Elizabeth was in the drawing room with him in the evening, reading or working quietly a few feet away. Wallpaper samples arrived, and the furniture in the breakfast room had been moved. Household matters he had managed on his own were now done by her, and plans he would have made alone now had to be made with her consideration.
What shook him the most was when he had thought she offered certain marital advantages. His heart had run wildly—eagerly—out of control in those few moments of misunderstanding.
