She was also dying, and their arrangement had nothing to do with affection. He only bowed, and shifted the topic away from esteem, love, passion, or any other such feeling that he ought not to indulge in.
“You shall be obliged to hear my strictures against our neighbours every Friday morning if I remain in this club,” he teased. “Whist in the country has low stakes and poor play.”
She gave a little laugh. “Do you have a membership to Brooks’s that I do not know about?”
It was at his tongue’s end to mention the clubs on St James’s Street where he was known by sight, but he was spared a reply by the sound of the house-bell. The maid showed in Miss Lucas and a woman who had been at the Longbourn ball but whose name he did not remember. Deciding that he had had enough awkward discussions about love and that there was nothing the ladies could say that he needed to hear, he left them to their conversation.
“How charming to see youand your husband together during the afternoon,” Charlotte said.
“Your father called on Mr Darcy on a matter of business, and they stopped to speak with me. It was only a coincidence,” Elizabethanswered quickly as she invited them to sit. Charlotte took the sofa, and Mrs Sophia Beverly, the former Miss Baker, took a chair. Mrs Beverly’s calling was unexpected, and something in Elizabeth’s expression must have betrayed her feelings.
“You are surprised, I see, Mrs Darcy, by my calling.” Mrs Beverly was a little older than Charlotte, and the ten years between them had prohibited a youthful friendship. “However, when I met Miss Lucas in Meryton, she was certain that you would receive me.”
“Of course. And may I say how I feel for your family on the death of Mrs Baker.” Mrs Beverly’s mother had been dead a month. Mrs Baker had had a foul temper and never had a kind word to anyone, but her guest had still lost her mother.
“I think her strong temperament strained her heart to such a degree that it gave out. I condole with you on the loss of your sister.” Elizabeth bowed her head. “That is why I called. A bereaved lady can feel friendless at home with no evening parties and no callers.”
Mourning required a suitable period of a quiet social life, and a public ball or evening society was out of the question, but no one would think anything against two bereaved ladies calling on one another. Mrs Beverly’s gesture was incredibly kind.
“I would welcome your company since we are obliged to stay more at home. We ladies might dare display our grief if we mixed with the neighbourhood. I might weep in front of someone if I went into public.”
Mrs Beverly gave a rueful smile. “Yes, my brother and father are allowed to go into the world and conduct their business, while I must stay at home and think always about my dear departed mother. How unjust that we are not allowed a distraction from our grief like our husbands and fathers. And I will go mad if I can only see my brother and father and Miss Lucas until I am out of mourning!” she cried with a smile.
Elizabeth laughed. “You must call on me when you wish for a diversion. Nothing could be said against two ladies in black calling on one another.”
“I do not mean to imply that you must have grown tired of yourhusband’s company. You are a newly married woman, after all.” Mrs Beverly gave her a knowing smile.
Elizabeth brought a hand to her burning cheek. She supposed this was when newly married ladies of the same age might coyly discuss or refer to feelings and acts she had no more knowledge of than Charlotte. The comparative isolation in which she lived with Mr Darcy, and their love and grief for Georgiana, strengthened the slight bond that initially united them. But no matter their companionship or mutual esteem, she was still going to die, and amorous affection had no place in their arrangement.
“I know you have had few visitors since you married, Eliza,” Charlotte said when Elizabeth had no reply. “I thought you might enjoy widening your circle whilst you are in mourning.”
“You are very kind, my dear Charlotte.” Her mother had not come but for the funeral, and Lydia only came when she had no other amusements. She was still too angry with Mr Collins and Mary for their callous remarks to Mr Darcy to call on them at Longbourn.Not that I have any desire to see them.
“Not to wait on a bride is remiss, even considering Miss Darcy’s death,” Mrs Beverly said. “I suspect your neighbours will slowly begin to make calls. In the meantime, you must be such a comfort to Mr Darcy. There are some days, when I am missing my mother, that a hug and smile from Mr Beverly are the only things that console me.”
Mrs Beverly gave a sympathetic, knowing expression that Elizabeth tried to mimic. She might be a comfort to Mr Darcy, but while an expressive look and a conversation might readily pass between them, an embrace was not likely. He was more compassionate than she had previously credited him as being, but the idea of his hugging her to seek solace and reassurance was implausible.
What if I want a quiet embrace to comfort me as I mourn Georgiana, as well as grieving for my own shortened life?If Mr Darcy would return her embrace, if he found any solace in it, it would not be a disagreeable thing, but Elizabeth was certain he would pull away from her if she tried.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
When Charlotte and Mrs Beverly were gone, Elizabeth sat at the instrument and tried to ignore her troubled thoughts.“Indeed, I do love Mrs Darcy.”Mr Darcy had sounded hesitant but not mocking. Elizabeth shook her head and played a little louder.It does me no good to imagine an affectionate embrace from my husband.No one could comfort her as she contemplated her impending death. Before her song was complete, she noticed Mr Darcy had entered to attend her performance.
“I begin to think you truly did marry me to have music in the house,” she said when she finished.
“You could not blame me, I am sure, for enjoying music whenever I am fortunate enough to hear it.”
She shook off her melancholy and smiled. “Well, what request we are in! Someone in the neighbourhood wants to mix with the new bride as much as my mourning will allow, and the gentlemen have decreed you are necessary to the whist club.”
Mr Darcy nodded slowly. “We are in request, but is it pity or curiosity?”
“You are too cynical. There may be pity and curiosity amidst their interest, but on the whole, I think it neighbourly affection that drivesthem. You shall have to content yourself to no longer being a subject of gossip, and accept establishing ourselves as part of the community.”
“My being a respectable married man, and to the ‘brightest jewel’ in the county, is the only reason I was invited.”
Elizabeth turned back to the keys. He did not sound sarcastic, and that pleased her more than it should. “You do not mind being in Meryton for a little while longer? We will stay until, until I am dead?”
“If it makes you happy. In a month, I shall have to tell my friends that I am back from Madeira and if...”
