Damon
It’s a Monday, a week since I made dinner for Joslyn, and I can’t stop thinking about that night. I’m back in the office with stacks of work on my desk, but all I can think about is Joslyn. She was so fucking responsive. I loved it. It took everything I had to not go further than I did. God knows, I’ve been jerking off morning and night to the memory of it. It’s pretty much all I can think about.
Jonesy stopped coming by to talk to me when I failed to respond to any of his attempts at conversation. He’s probably laughing his ass off. I would be if our situations were reversed. I’m in deep, for sure, but I don’t like how unclear things are between us right now.
I know what I want with her, but I’m not sure what she wants. Hell, I’m not suresheknows what she wants right now. She’s very skittish about relationships and men. I completely understand, given her marriage to Kurt. I don’t think she’s dated much since his death, either. There’s a touch of naiveté about her that’s incredibly appealing. The protector in me can’t help but love it. It makes me feel needed in a way I’ve never felt before, and I’d like to explore what this could be with her.
She’s sexy, intelligent, and so very beautiful. So much better than any fantasy I could have dreamed up, now or as a rookie. Am I surprised? No, not really. I think even my younger self knew there was something specialabout her. If I’m honest, I’ve never forgotten about her. No matter who I was with, she was always in the back of my mind. Not sure that was entirely fair to all the women I’ve been with. The most common complaint I’ve had in relationships was that I wasn’t fully committed. I’m starting to wonder if I just never got over her. It’s looking like maybe I was never meant to get over her.
I could ask her on a date? It would show her that I’m looking for something more than just sex. Not that sex wouldn’t be phenomenal, but I don’t want that to be the focus. I want to be clear about my intentions without overwhelming her.
Since my divorce, I’ve learned a great deal about relationships. My last girlfriend was excellent at communication. Our relationship didn’t work out, but she taught me a great deal about how women think and feel. Even though she was much younger, she was more emotionally mature. She was also extremely open about everything. And I mean everything. It was a revelation. I still talk to her on occasion, and her advice was invaluable when I first tried to patch things up with my daughter.
I’m still trying to devise a game plan for asking Joslyn on a date when Jonesy knocks on my door, even though it’s open and he could simply walk in.
He hasn’t been here long, but he’s fitting in as if he’s worked here for years. He’s even got himself set up with a loft about ten minutes from the office. Then again, he’s always been the kind of guy who can fit in anywhere, but I’m confident he genuinely likes it here.
Joslyn and Jacob have welcomed him with open arms, like I knew they would, making him feel like part of the family. They all get along exceptionally well. For Joslyn, I’m sure it didn’t hurt that Abby took to him right away. I’ve seen the box of treats he’s hiding in his desk. He’s smart to hide it. I wouldn’t get in nearly as much trouble if I had. Joslyn might be right about Abby getting too many treats, but I’m sure as hell notgoing to tell her about Jonesy’s stash. Jacob, Jonesy, and I have informally agreed to a don’t ask, don’t tell policy regarding dog treats. Regardless, I’m grateful he’s here because I’d be dying under this workload without his highly qualified assistance.
“Why’d you knock, dude? Door’s open.”
“Are you kidding me? Maybe because you’ve been completely unresponsive all fucking morning. Hello, are you even here today? Mentally, I mean.”
“Yeah, my bad, man. I’m sorry. Have a lot on my mind,”
“Well, that’s obvious. You need to tell me all the latest, but first, business. Sadly. Can you take a dinner for me on Friday night with some of the players? I’ll be out of town. I’m trying to get to know the leaders on the team. It’ll give us an idea of how they’ll respond to the changes we plan on making. We need to find out before the season who’ll be a problem and who we can count on for support.”
Yup, I know exactly what he means. Some players are adaptable, and some are not. It’s our job to ensure we get the best players with the right attitude who will buy into the kind of culture we are trying to create here. The last thing we need is opposition in the locker room.
“I know this is usually a coach thing, but since we don’t have one right now,” he gives me a pointed look, “I decided to take one for the team. ‘Cause I’m a giver like that. Also, we need to talk about the coach thing, too.”
“Wow, so much to unpack there.” Although it’s my fault for not paying attention all morning, I focus on answering his questions. “First, Joslyn and I are working on the coach angle. We hope to have something solid for you by the end of the month. It’s later than we’d all like, but it should be worth the wait. Second, which players are you talking about? I know we have concerns about several on our roster. Send me an email withbriefs on each one so I know what I’m up against, and I’ll be glad to take that dinner for you.” I rub a hand over my face.
“Also, I don’t want to talk about what’s on my mind, and finally, you are so not a giver. That’s a lie. So fuck off.”
He bursts out laughing. “Yeah, fine, you’re right, I’m not a giver, but I do want to get rid of the troublemakers before that shit starts. It can wreck a team, and I’m not about to let that happen. Then, you can do your deal magic, and we’ll be good. So, who are you looking at for a coach? Anyone I know?”
“You know everyone, so yeah, of course. I’m still not going to tell you, though. You’ll know when everyone else knows. But, because I am a giver, I will tell you that they are on the younger, more open-minded side. But that’s all you’re getting from me.” I smirk. It will drive him crazy trying to figure out who it is, which is fine because he won’t be laughing at my love life.
“You’re getting mean in your old age, asshole.” His narrowed eyes are brimming with suspicion. I just smile my evil smile and don’t answer.
“Hmph!” he grunts and walks out. And, at least for now, he’s forgotten to give me shit about Jos. Always a plus.
Round one to me.
I’m meeting up with Jacob for beers tonight, and I have to admit, I’m looking forward to it. We haven’t had much time to talk since I started as GM, so it will be nice to catch up. He’s changed so much from the scrappy eleven-year-old kid that I remember from my rookie days. I used to see him at the rink all the time. I was there a lot for “extra practice”. By extra practice, I mean anytime Joslyn was there, so I could try to get her attention.
I was surprised at the genuine friendship that began to develop between Jacob and me. It led to my first real role as a mentor, and I found that I enjoyed it quite a bit. To be fair, Jacob was a great kid. Eager to learn and improve on his skills. Now that I know so much more about his father and uncle, I can see that as a young boy on the cusp of manhood, he was dying for a positive masculine connection. Looking back now, I’m glad I was able to be there for him.
We’re meeting at the Wynkoop Brewery for beers, which brings its own kind of nostalgia. It was one of my old haunts from my player days. The place has a rustic feel, with old wood floors and a worn wooden bar against the back wall. The whole second floor is covered in pool tables. I’d spent many a night there with my teammates, playing pool and hanging out. There’s something about this place that always makes me feel at home.
It’s a Monday night, so the place isn’t very crowded, which is a relief. Trying to talk over music and a bunch of people isn’t my idea of a good time. I can see Jacob’s blond head at the bar right away. He sticks out, even when he’s not wearing his typical suit and tie. Looks like he’s dressed casually for once in jeans and a dark green golf shirt. I was starting to wonder if he even had a pair of jeans, so it’s nice to be proven wrong. Even dressed down, he has that air of authority and competence about him. It makes me proud because I feel like I had a part in that, however small it may have been.
I clap him on the shoulder to get his attention.
“Hey, man. Good idea to come here. The place has a lot of good memories.” I say as I grab the barstool next to him.
He gives me a wide, happy grin.
