“You actually taught me toonlylie to others.”
“I’m sorry,” he whispers.
“About which offense?”
He flinches, my words landing like the knife I intended them to be.
“I deserve that.”
“Yeah, you do.”
“Then why are you here, Holden?”
“Well, you called and said you were dying. You called and said the last amends you needed to make were with me. And unlike you, I actually have values, Jerry. I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy to let guilt consume them because they couldn’t say their piece.”
His head bobs as he contemplates my harsh words.
“I’m sorry that’s harsh, bu?—”
He raises his hand, interrupting me. “You’re right. You don’t owe me anything. And I owe you, well, the world, but I’m thankful you came today.”
I don’t reply. There’s nothing really to say that wouldn’t be pouring salt over lifelong wounds. Except they don’t feel old, certainly not to him, according to what he said in the voice message he left. Definitely not to me.
“Where do you want me to start?” he asks in a flat tone, straight to the point.
“How long?”
“How long do I have to live?”
“How long were you planning on letting me live thinking you were dead?”
He lets out a sigh. “I was respecting Brenda’s wishes.”
I shake my head. “Leave my mother’s name out of your mouth.”
He flinches, realization flashing over his face. “You don’t know, do you?”
That you’re a piece of shit? Yes, I know.
That you left us believing you were dead while she raised two kids alone? Yes, I know.
How she had nothing because you made her quit her job, her friends, her life? Yes, I know.
How much I hate you? Yes, I know.
“Son—” he clears his throat “—Holden, you need to sit down for this.”
“If you’re speaking ill of my mother, the womanyouabandoned years before your supposed death every time you chose the bottle over her, then no, I don’t want to be here to hear it.” I pinch my nose. “Maybe it was a mistake, coming here. I thought you wanted to talk to me, not bitch about her.”
“Language.”
“Language?” I scoff. “You lost the right to correct anything about me.”
He coughs.
Once.
Twice.
