“I, um.” I clear my throat, looking around, trying to find an escape route. “It’s not due until Friday, right?”
She says, “Yes, and you know, technically, we can leave it as a plus one. We don’t need a name or anything, but if you’re not bringing someone, we can sell that seat to someone else.”
“I’m paying for the seat.”
“You own the center. You don’t have to pay for it. Add a name when you know, or don’t add a name, and bring whoever.”
“Are you taking the so-called girlfriend of yours?” Mateo asks.
“Who else would he take?” Aspen asks, walking back inside, eating a popsicle.
“I thought you were going to stay with the kids since they like you?” Julia asks, and we snicker. Liam also came in, right on time to hear the last sentence. He, more than anyone, knows Ihave two possibilities on who to bring. Technically, I could bring Natalie or Jerry. We’re still weeks out from it, but really, it could be either one.
This is my framily. Natalie was right. They deserve to know. It’s not jinxing things with Natalie, and they definitely won’t judge me for not telling them about Jerry. But I should. I’m sure they’ll shed some clarity on the whole situation.
“Actually…yes, I’m thinking about inviting Natalie.”
Julia smiles, and so does Daisy, as if they knew. Liam nods, and Aspen gasps.
“Wait, Natalie? She has a name. Oh shit. Talk. Tell us.”
“Let him speak. This is why he doesn’t talk to us, because you—” Julia points at Aspen “—have zero chill. Let the man talk.”
Chili can sense something’s going on, because she zooms from Mateo’s lap to me. I pet the top of her head, mustering the courage to speak.
"But there’s someone else I could bring.”
Aspen gasps again. “You havetwogirlfriends?” he shouts.
“Shut up!” Liam, Daisy, and Julia all shout in unison.
I take a deep breath and start telling them everything that has happened over the past six weeks, from meeting Natalie on Father’s Day while I was in Baker Oaks to seeing Jerry. I go all the way back to the day of Mom and Liz’s funeral, and how he showed up, shaking my world even more. I tell them about his kidney disease and dialysis treatment. I tell them about everything.
It’s hard all over again, but they’re patient with me as I take my time explaining it all. By the end, there are tears, smiles, and heads bobbing in understanding. They, of course, are not judgmental, and they understand because that’s who they are, and I should’ve known.
“So yeah, that has been my summer so far.”
“Phew. What a mess,” Aspen murmurs.
“It’s been wild for sure,” I add.
“Okay, so where do you go from here?”
I shrug. “I’m not sure. There’s nothing else to say between Jerry and me, so I need to figure out if I want a relationship with him or not.”
“Do you want therapist Julia or friend Julia?” Julia asks.
“Both.” I smile.
“I’m happy you’re finding closure, but do you think you can continue your life and shut him out now that you know he’s alive and how he has turned his life around?”
I ponder her question, and it’s nothing new. It’s nothing I haven’t considered before. What do I want from him? What do I want for us? Is this an end to that chapter now that I know all the info, or is this a beginning ofI want to develop a relationship with him?
“I don’t know,” I reply. “I’m so mad at my mom, but then I feel guilty for being mad at her.”
“That’s fair.”
“It feels like I’m betraying her if I have a relationship with him.”
