Then she notices the rest of us clinging on Adarna’s back. Hanan whispers into the bird’s ears, and I feel Adarna shudder. I long to know what she’s telling it. Hanan looks to all of us and we palm our weapons. Then Adarna begins to sing, an ethereal, enchanting sound that echoes and harmonises with itself. I keep my blade nicking my skin, out of sight, letting the streams of blood soak into my clothes. We keep ourselves present through pain as the Seaguardians begin to waver and then fall into a stupor. The queen resists Adarna’s lure, staring instead at Hanan and moving towards us.
Raina begins to cry, writhing in her sling. The queen starts forward and Hanan puts a protective arm around the baby.
‘Don’t hurt her,’ the queen says, reaching her hands out, voice anguished.
She never really looked much like Hanan to me, but I don’t know much about babies.
Hanan soothes Raina, and Ris braces for a fight, shaking herself awake from the song.
Eventually the queen speaks, her voice thick and hoarse. ‘What do you want?’
‘Abdicate the crown to the princess,’ Hanan says without hesitation.
She speaks so confidently, with a familiar intimacy that is uncomfortable to behold. What did Hanan say about her former life? She was bound and expelled. And this was the woman responsible. I don’t know if I could look at the source of such pain with the defiance she does.
‘She needs me to survive. The princess needs me more than she needs you. I want protection for me and my friends.’
The queen baulks at the suggestion and raises her hand towards the Seaguardians.
‘If you hurt me, she’ll die,’ Hanan says.
The two women stare each other down, and the air hums with expectation. I think of Hanan’s mark glowing in the cavern.
‘Will you yield?’ Hanan asks.
The queen falters, stopping in her tracks.
‘I will consider your terms,’ the queen says eventually, and we all hear the defeat in her voice.
Hanan holds Raina gently again, kissing the top of her head. ‘Consider my terms? You’re unfit to rule.’ She turns to the Seaguardians, some of whom still have their weapons raised. ‘Do you know what she has done? She has violated the Tree of Life. The holy sacrament of the dead. She has defiled the souls of the dead to feed her bloodlust. She feasts on your ancestors. Will you let this continue?’
The queen lunges for Raina, grabbing her out of the other woman’s arms. We topple from Adarna’s back, and there’s a tangle of bodies as we all drop to the ground. The Seaguardians try to close rank, to maintain control. I swipe my blade, desperate to find the queen’s flesh. We are all armed, and there is no glory in this killing. It is a case of who can get to her first. I grab her by the hair and gleaming pins scatter to the ground like embers.
‘Mercy! For my daughter’s sake!’
There is nothing divine about a woman crying and gasping for breath, putting herself between her child and my blade. Perhaps that’s what puts my guard down. A sliver of humanity, some sign of a beating heart under that cold exterior. And then she grabs the edge of my blade, bloody-palmed, and thrusts the hilt into my stomach,winding me. As I’m doubled over, I hear her retreating in the distance, screaming: ‘Seize the bird! Attack the traitors!’
The Seaguardians are rallied by her command. They swarm, and we’re buffeted by the force of them. I’m underfoot, only the bite of metal, rust of blood and teeth to spit out. I yell, taking down Seaguardians and using their bodies as means, to find air in the chaos. I bite earlobes, punch soft bellies, break noses. Not much difference between animal bodies. Sinigang must be in the crowd somewhere, causing havoc. I wouldn’t like to see what that otter-cat can do when let loose.
I wipe the blood from my eyes and push through the throng towards Hanan. She has the queen locked in some wild embrace, clinging on to her, nuzzling her. They hold hands together on Adarna, clutching at the bird’s feathery breast, keeping it grounded. It must be compelled somehow, for it stays completely still at their touch. From their point of contact come streaks of blue. Pools of cerulean and turquoise spill onto the flagstones.
My knees give out, and I slump to the ground. In my periphery I see the same thing happen around me. We’re all on our knees, begging, in supplication. I watch a leaf where I kneel turn crisp and golden. It shrivels and decays, changing to dust.
It feels like someone is trying to pull my insides out through my belly button. My organs are shutting down, ready to melt inside me. I collapse into myself, no longer in control of my body. Thoughts are all that’s left to me. I can’t see Isagani or Ris. I don’t want them to be alone right now. In truth,Idon’t want to be alone right now.
Larkin. The image of those statues, an army of silent, unmoving vessels. Frozen in their agony and dying in fear and isolation. Only one thing in life is guaranteed: we’re all going to die someday. All you can hope for is release from the pain, the sweetness of sleep. But thequeen won’t even give us that peace. The dead are an infinite source of energy. And that’s too delicious for her to resist. The royals have been gorging on Paranish, feeding on every living thing like a parasite. I try to focus on Hanan, now struggling with the queen. At least I can die knowing I almost had the courage to strike.
chapter sixty-two
hanan
I was a foolto believe we could destroy the queen. She pushes our hands onto Adarna’s feathers, and locks me in place, wrapping her arms tightly around me. She nuzzles hard into my neck, pushing the stone talisman out of the way. Then she bites, sucking hard. I scream, trying desperately to tear myself away from her. The times she fed on me before were games, little tests building my stamina, my tolerance for pain. But this is something else. This is finally real. She’s a predator, teeth sunk into prey. She pushes Adarna’s energy into my hand and then takes everything through me, through my blood. I don’t know how much more I can take. I collapse into her, and she moans into my ear.
‘You are nothing, Hanan.’
I understand it now. She takes pleasure not only in the feed, but in the kill. Slaying me will slake her bloodlust, for now. Punishment for disobeying her, for daring to live when she sentenced me to death, for stealing Raina and claiming her as mine.
Adarna bucks and shifts under our touch. I focus on the bird’s energy, trying to dip my hand back into its mind’s waters. Adarna looks at me with ferocious eyes. I had been so focused on the idea of the queen harnessing its power I hadn’t considered the bird’s unbridled hunger. We have shown it the world beyond the Maelstrom. An entire nation of energy for the feeding. It is a wild and untameablething. Priestess Sinaya learned that, hiding herself in the cave to keep it from falling into the wrong hands. Among those bones and rags, I could feel hers.
