She jumps but relaxes when she realizes it’s me. She tilts her head to the side so I kiss her neck.
“What’s that?” She questions breathlessly.
My hands glide up her stomach, securing both breasts. “Finding you in my house, cooking when I get home at night. I’m so glad I gave you my keys.”
Turning in my arms, she wraps them around my neck. “I hope you don’t mind, but I figured it was okay to use them as long as I made you dinner.”
I lean forward, meshing my lips with hers, taking her tongue into my mouth. She moans, and I pull away, leaning my forehead into hers. “Of course. It’s crazy how natural this feels again.”
Her head bobs up and down in agreement. “It is.”
The pan sizzles and Embyr tends to it. “It smells amazing,” I tell her.
She smiles a thoughtful smile. “It’s a spice blend that my dad used to make. He always made the best burgers. I’m just glad he told me the recipe before he died. It would have been a shame to take with him.”
Her dad. He was a hero. I remember he died in the line of duty around the time we graduated. I didn’t go to the funeral. I should have. I know she needed someone there. After all, she lost her mother shortly before. When he passed, she had no one.
“I’m sorry about your mom and dad, Embyr. That had to be tough.”
She gives a non-committal shrug. “Yeah, it was. I miss them every single day. Not one hour goes by without me thinking about them.”
I can’t imagine losing my parents but to lose them at such a young age had to affect her. All that and on top of what we did. I just can’t get my head on straight about the whole thing. Her teenage years were rough. No wonder she set out her revenge plan, and with that thought my stomach coils. I forgive her. I do. I just still have some feelings I need to sort through.
“I can imagine there isn’t. I just feel terrible about all the shit that was piled on you back then.”
She sets the spatula down and turns to me. “Casen, I’m talking to a therapist. I have someone to help me through it. I don’t want you to ever apologize for what happened back then again. I’ve forgiven. I might never forget, but I forgive you. All of you.”
I place a chaste kiss on her lips. “Okay. No more apologies.” I continue, remembering my conversation with Reece. “Speaking of all of us. I talked to Reece today about cornering you.”
She pauses, a look of fear in her eyes. “You did?”
“I did. I asked him why after all this time he would make you feel uncomfortable and ask you things that shouldn’t matter any longer.”
She pulls the burgers off the pan and goes about making our plates as I pour us some drinks. I let her keep her quiet until we’ve settled in at the table.
“Are you not interested in his answer?” I ask her, just before taking a bite. The burger is beyond anything I have ever tasted. I wipe my mouth. “Jesus, Em. These are amazing.”
Her lips rise in a half-hearted smile. “Thank you, and I am interested. I’m just a bit nervous to hear his response.” She hesitates another moment. “Okay, tell me.”
“He said that like me, back in high school, he had a thing for you.” Her eyes widen in surprise. “Yeah, said he had liked you too and he knew even before I told the whole PITCREW I had feelings for you. He must have had them pretty bad to be upset over you accepting Ian’s invitation over his.”
“I guess so,” she responds. “I still can’t believe he liked me. I didn’t have a clue. He was always screwing around with some girl, shit, multiple girls. You would think if you wanted to date someone that they’d pay more attention to you. Not that I would have noticed. I was really focused on you.”
“He may have just wanted sex from you, Embyr. That’s just the kind of guy he always was. Maybe it bothered him that you slept with Ian.” If I thought her revenge plan made my stomach turn, remembering that videotape has me on the brink of losing the three bites of food I’ve had. If we’re going to get over it, then I guess I’m going to have to learn to be okay with everything as much as she is. What she has to deal with is far worse than what I do.
“Well, either way. We’re older now. That is something he should have gotten over. He may have made me nervous showing up unannounced when Trinity wasn’t home, but when it comes to fight or flight, I fight now.”
I laugh at the thought of Reece getting his ass kicked by Embyr. I don’t doubt she could get in a few punches before Reece knew what happened. “He said the next time he saw you he would apologize, and I hope he does. After what happened to you back in high school, intimidating women is kind of a trigger point for me, especially seeing as he is my best friend. He should know better now.”
She nods. “I agree, but I hope you know that I’m not the same girl I was. I’m a lot stronger now and know my worth. There are so many things I did wrong back then.”
I grab her hand, rubbing along the smooth top of it. “Embyr, you did nothing wrong.”
“I know you want to say that because you were involved in it,” she pauses, taking a sip of her drink, “but I should have said something. Told someone, and if I ever have kids I’m going to make sure they don’t bully and they don’t allow themselves to be bullied. I would also hope that I’d raise them to stick up for those who aren’t strong enough to.”
The contents of my stomach turn and my vision of having her for dessert fades quickly. I’m guilty of all that. I allowed them to hurt her without helping. All I had to do was say something. Even anonymously would have been better than nothing at all, which is what I did. I bullied her too. I don’t think for a moment I didn’t. Even if I didn’t take part in everything they were doing to her, I am still responsible for it. She also mentioned not allowing yourself to be bullied. They tore me down too. My so-called friends made sure I kept my mouth shut by intimidating me. I was a victim of the PITCREW as well but not as much as her.
“Don’t do that, Casen,” she says, breaking into the chastising I’m giving myself. “Don’t feel bad or start to take pity on me again. I don’t want it.”
