Not when her back was striped with fresh scars, not when she’d nearly died in the pit. They were fools if they believed she’d ever soften. She’d earned her fury and the grudges she carried.
“The vote is three to one.” Teal’s gaze searched my face. “What are you going to do?”
This was happening. They’d made their choice. Now I had to make mine.
They were willing to throw away everything for her. For a woman who hated us.
I could order them back. Pull rank, remind them of their oaths, their duty to the crown. They’d follow—eventually. Maybe. Probably not.
Staying with them meant the end of every dream I’d ever held dear. My gut twisted with more regrets than I could count. I’d never lead an army. I’d never sit on the council. I’d never see pride shining in my father’s eyes. I swallowed around the ache in my throat. What was the point of achieving everything I’d dreamed of if it meant abandoning the only people who’d ever truly mattered to me? “I’m staying.”
Chapter
Forty-Three
HAVEN
At the mention of my mother’s name, their gorgeous faces shuttered, and the tendril of connection—of trust—I’d felt toward Zane withered.
Secrets. They were keeping secrets.
“How did your mother die?” Zane took a seat on the log next to me, his voice careful.
I ignored the scent of fresh-brewed tea and the sharp tang of his sweat and shifted away from him. “The guard took her. She died at the front.”
Remy crossed his arms, his tone skeptical. “Are you sure about that?”
“Grandmother mourned her for nearly twenty-five years. If my mother were alive, she would’ve gotten word to her.”
Zane leaned forward slightly. “What if Hope contacting Valera might have put your grandmother in danger?”
My fingers trembled, and it had nothing to do with the weather. “How do you know my grandmother’s name?”
Remy looked down at me and smirked. “We can’t tell you.”
I longed to knock the smug smile off his handsome face. Instead, I shoved my hands in my pockets and said, “Clearly, you can.”
Zane reached for my arm. “It’s not our story to tell.”
I stood, avoiding his touch. “You know my grandmother’s first name, you obviously know something about my mother’s death, and you claim it’s not your story to tell? Maybe that’s true, but my mother’s death is part of my story.”
“You think we owe you an explanation?” Remy loomed over me. He was too tall, and too well muscled, and too snarly.
And I was too angry to answer him. Instead, I turned and walked toward the break in the trees that had led me here.
“Where are you going?” Remy made a grab for my arm, which I evaded.
“You think I owe you an explanation?” I was all too happy to throw his words back at him.
“Please, Haven.” The plea in Zane’s deep voice nearly stopped me. “Where are you going?”
“I’ll take my chances in Legacia with the devils I know.” The trees were only a few yards away. Then what? I’d wander around the forest till spring? I was too angry to care.
“Good luck finding your way.” Remy took being an asshole to a whole new level.
I glanced over my shoulder. Remy’s lips were curled in a sneer.
Zane held his hands out, pleading. “You can’t go.”
