Ding-dong, ding-dong.
Mom’s doorbell sounds, and the boys jump, looking at me.
Felix must have finished his exam earlier than he thought. For his sake, I hope that’s a good thing.
Smiling at the boys, I casually say, “That’ll be Felix.”
Which brings the reaction I expected, with them both jumping off the couch, bouncing up and down in front of me. They know they aren’t allowed to answer the front door unless an adult tells them they can, so their eyes are pleading as they glare at me.
“Maybe you should go open the door for him,” I say, and they’re off like lightning, screaming Felix’s name with such excitement. I start trying to get myself up off the couch, balancing and getting my crutches under my arms. My leg is still quite weak, so I have to take it easy. I see the physiotherapist tomorrow and start my rehab.
My concentration being on getting up without injuring myself, I hadn’t realized how quiet the house had become. Then I hear footsteps coming back toward the living room, and Kade comes around the corner.
“Poppy, Poppy, there’s a lady at the door who looks just like you. Except she’s old and wrinkly. Not beautiful like my dad calls you,” Kade babbles quickly, and it takes my brain a few seconds to take in what he just said. But then the puzzle pieces connect, and the wave of sheer panic rolls over me.
“Oh, shit,” I blurt out as a shudder runs through my body.
“Dollar for the swear jar,” Kade cheers, which makes me start to move. I can’t be falling apart. I have to protect the boys. Keep them safe. I don’t know anything about this woman.
In my head, I’m repeating the words over and over,Landon, help, I need you. Landon, help, I need you.
Which is totally useless, because it’s not like he can help me right now. I have to pull my shit together. The boys and Landon are depending on me. I can’t let them down.
As I start hobbling across the room, Nash comes around the corner slowly, looking a little paler than before and in a total state of confusion.
“Poppy, the lady out there says she’s your mom. But Mrs. B is your mom.” His words stop me right in front of him. And the panic I was feeling is gone, suddenly taken over by anger. How dare she say that to a little boy. I haven’t even met her and she’s already pissing me off.
“Boys, come close,” I say nice and quietly so only the two of them can hear me speaking. “I want you both to go and sit on the couch and stay quiet.” Pulling my phone from my pocket, I unlock it, open the contact I need, and hand it to Nash.
“Nash, when I go to the door, I want you to push Daddy’s name on my phone to call him. Tell him a lady named Tessa is at the door. Can you do that?” He nods quickly. “What’s the name you need to tell him?” I ask him again.
“Tessa,” he whispers. And surprisingly, Kade has gone quiet all of a sudden. I think he has sensed that something isn’t right.
“Good boy. Go now.” They both scurry to the couch, and Nash is looking at me with so much concentration for the job I just gave him.
“Okay, now Nash,” I say and start to maneuver myself around the corner into the hallway that leads straight to the front door. I stop for a moment just to take in the vision of the person at the door who I’m almost certain is going to turn out to be my biological mother.
Standing with her back to me is a woman with long blonde hair that looks dry and a little shabby. She’s wearing a pair of black pants, some sort of sandals, and a floral shirt that is hanging loose. About my height, although a lot thinner than my build, from what I can make out.
As a child I rehearsed this moment so many times. I acted it out in my bedroom sometimes when I was feeling a little lost. What I would say. Deciding if I would hug her or run and jump into her arms. As I got older, I changed, picturing myself being reserved and just saying hello politely.
But with my annoyance raging inside me and the feeling of the disrespect she showed, calling herself my mother in this house, I’m ready to go straight to the door and give her a piece of my mind. However, if Mom were here, she’d be so disappointed in me for reacting like that.
Taking a deep breath like Landon always tells me to do, I close my eyes, listen to his calm voice in my head, and slowly let it out.
I can do this. I am strong.
Words I have always lived by until I lost my way a few months ago, but it’s something Landon is constantly reminding me.
Opening my eyes, I start moving toward the door. There is no way I can be quiet on crutches. The noise has Tessa turning to face me.
In a split second it hits me. I don’t need to wait for the DNA results.
I’m looking at myself, wrinkled and older, exactly like Kade said.
This is one of those times I’m reminded how literal he can be.
Chapter Seventeen
