Cesar appeared to be genuinely surprised. ‘I’m sorry you think marriage to me such a dreadful prospect.’
Feelings erupted inside her. She wanted to go to him and hold him close, kiss him and drive the ghosts of the past away. Surely he could see that marriage between them was impossible. ‘It’s not a terrible prospect,’ she protested. ‘It’s impractical. It wouldn’t work. I’ve told you I love you—to which you showed no reaction at all. It’s as if you don’t value my love. ‘
‘Nothing could be further from the truth,’ he insisted. ‘And I’d like to know what you base your conclusions on. I’ve made it plain from the outset that I’m not too grand for you. In fact, you come from a far more stable background. There must be another reason for your refusal. What is it, Sofia? What’s holding you back?’
‘I can’t be with such an emotionless man. If this proposal of marriage is just a duty for you it wouldn’t be honest of me to accept. I’d be selling your people short. We both would. They deserve more than a reluctant princess and a cold-hearted prince.’
‘Cold-hearted?’ Cesar queried frowning. ‘Haven’t I made it clear that you can have anything you want?’
‘But I don’t want material things. I want honesty, truth and love. Where are your feelings, Cesar? Where are you hiding them? Why can’t you express them? Or do you think it’s weak to show emotion?’
‘Of course not.’ He was growing heated now. ‘I have deep feelings for my people, my family, and especially for you. What do you want me to say, Sofia? I know what I want. Marry me. Give me the chance to make you happy. You’ve nothing to fear from me. You’re free to leave this marriage if you’re unhappy, and of course that would be with a pension for life.’
That was the worst thing he could have said. Hope died inside her. It was as if her heart had shrunk until it resembled a walnut, shrivelled and dry.
‘Haven’t you listened to a word I’ve said?’ she asked quietly. ‘I don’t want or need a pension for life. You make it sound as if I’m to be rewarded for deceiving your people.’
‘I would never deceive my people,’ Cesar protested, incredulous.
‘With a grand royal wedding and a smiling bride?’ she suggested. ‘What would you call it? When I get married it will be for love, not for what I can get out of it. The era for business-like marriage mergers is long past!’
‘But you’ll be safe with me,’ Cesar insisted, as if he couldn’t believe what she’d said. ‘I’ve bought up Howard Blake’s empire so he’ll never trouble you again. My former equerry Dom is currently in custody and will be judged by the highest court in the land. I intend to live my life protecting you and my people in every way I can. If you have even a gram of the renowned Acosta honour, surely you’ll support me in this?’
‘By marrying a man who cannot share his true feelings with me?’
It was tragic to think Cesar did have feelings, deep feelings, but he was incapable of expressing them in a way her heart could accept. In that, she supposed when she thought about it, they were both guilty.
‘I’m sorry I’ve got no pretty words for you,’ he said at last. ‘That’s just not who I am. Rest assured, I have no intention of forcing you to do anything you don’t want to do. I’m relying on your good sense to get you through this.’
‘You make it sound as if I must survive some unpleasant illness that can be dosed with a spoonful of sugar. I want so much more out of marriage than that. Love dies if it’s all one-sided, and I couldn’t bear—’
‘To be abandoned again?’ he suggested gently.
She took a moment to refocus, as he added, ‘Losing your parents has left a gaping wound, and it’s important for you to know that I understand. It will take time to prove I can help you heal, but I need the chance to do that.’
A tsunami of emotion threatened to overwhelm her. She had no doubt now that Cesar was sincere. Marrying him was a dream that could so easily become reality. All she had to do was say yes. But she wanted the best for Cesar too. He was a king amongst men, strong and principled, sincere, and she’d never find anyone like him again. Her heart yearned for nothing more than to twin with his. She truly couldn’t fault him. And, of course, she loved him with all her heart.
‘Maybe I could have said things better,’ he conceded in the silence, ‘but I’m not an orator, and I didn’t plan to win your heart with words. I can see now that I’ve rushed things, but once I see a goal I go for it. There’s been no time to woo you as you deserve, but I’ll try to make it up to you. Most importantly, I’ll care for you and keep you safe. Anything you need for the wedding can be ordered online,’ he added, frowning as he compiled his mental list. ‘If you need people to help you to prepare, call them now and put them on standby. Transport will be arranged for everyone who attends the ceremony. Make that clear to anyone you invite—’
‘Cesar!’ Her shout stopped him in his tracks. ‘There can be no wedding. Have you listened to me at all?’
‘The ceremony can take place in one week’s time on my private island of Isla Ardente,’ he said, unwittingly supplying the answer to her question.
‘You’re making plans for an event I have no intention of attending,’ she pointed out.
‘But that’s the neatest way,’ he insisted. ‘When we’re married we’ll draw even bigger crowds to the charity matches. You’ll need a ring, of course,’ the man she loved with all her heart added, frowning, ‘So why don’t you browse the internet and choose something you’d like?’
For a moment the plastic rings that came in Christmas crackers flashed into her head. They would be perfect for a sham wedding.
‘Better still, leave it to me!’ he exclaimed, ‘I have contacts at all the top jewellers—’
‘Of course you do!’ she interrupted. Doubt crept into the mix as she imagined all the expensive trinkets Cesar must have purchased over the years.
‘There’s no real urgency for an engagement ring’ he added thoughtfully, ‘though I expect you’d like something to show off at some point—’
‘Show off?’ she burst out.
‘Whatever you like,’ Cesar countered, with a smile that proved he was oblivious to her mounting frustration. ‘Though we’ll concentrate on finding a wedding band for now. We can sort out more jewellery later—’
