“Wow,” Stacey said, clearly impressed by Brittany’s performance. “Doesn’t that sound nice, Kent? You two always seemed so perfect together. Isn’t it worth giving it another chance?”
“Mom…” James said, his voice carrying a tone of warning.
“So what do you say, Kent?” Brittany said, holding out her hand. “Do you want to come home with me?”
“I… I don’t?—”
Brittany put on her best pouty face. “Is there someone else?” she asked, glancing at Stacey with a horrified look. Then she stopped. “No. Of course not. You’re not like your father, I know that much. You’d never do that to me.”
Stacey nodded. “Kent’s a good boy. He’d never cheat on you, Brittany.”
Brittany was laying a trap and Stacey had taken the bait willingly. Now both women were staring at me, waiting expectantly for my answer. My heart raced, my stomach twisted in knots, and I knew I was caught.
I stared at James, panic rising in my chest. His eyes had darkened, that haunted look I’d seen before when I hurt him. It was the same expression he wore when I’d bullied him as a teenager, when I’d said cruel things about his sexuality. I couldn’t bear to see that look again, not when we’d come so far.
But Stacey and Brittany were waiting for an answer, and I felt trapped between the truth I wanted to scream and the lie I might have to tell to protect us both.
“Kent?” Brittany prompted, taking a step closer. “Is… Is there someone else?”
I swallowed hard, my mouth suddenly dry. “Brittany, I?—”
“Of course there isn’t,” Stacey interjected, smiling encouragingly. “And even if there was a rebound, it couldn’t possibly compare to what you two had together.”
James flinched almost imperceptibly. Only I noticed because I’d become attuned to his every reaction. He turned away, busying himself with something in the kitchen, but I could see the tension in his shoulders, the way his hands gripped the counter.
And yet, I couldn’t bring myself to admit the truth, especially not like this. Trevor’s explosion paled in comparison to what Brittany would do if she found out what I’d become and I couldn’t do that to James. I couldn’t put him through that with his mom right there.
Besides, who were we kidding? No matter how we waited, nobody was ever going to accept us. We’d always just be stepbrothers,sexual deviantsin their eyes. Maybe it was time this little daydream came to an end. Wouldn’t that just be easier for everyone, anyway?
“No,” I said at last, hating myself the moment the word left my lips. “There’s nobody else.”
Brittany beamed, taking my answer as an invitation. She rushed forward and threw her arms around my neck before pressing a kiss to my lips that I didn’t return. “I knew it,” she whispered when she pulled away. “I knew you’d come back to me.”
I stood frozen, unable to return her embrace. Over her shoulder, I caught James’s expression, the devastation washing across his face before he quickly masked it with indifference. My chest constricted so tightly I could barely breathe.
“This is wonderful!” Stacey clapped her hands together. “I always knew you two would work things out.”
James turned away completely, his back to the room as he pretended to wash dishes that were already clean. His shoulderswere rigid, his movements mechanical. I’d seen that posture before. It was how he’d held himself through years of my bullying, through every cruel comment I’d ever thrown his way.
I’d promised him I wouldn’t run again. And here I was, doing exactly that.
“Come on,” Brittany said, pulling me toward the living room. “I’ll help you pack your stuff.”
Chapter 26
James
I’d been walking around all morning in a state of shock. From the moment Kent agreed to get back with Brittany, I’d barely been able to speak. I stayed in the kitchen while they packed, making myself look busy. I couldn’t bring myself to even glance up at Kent, not when the sight of him would break me.
Once everything was packed, Brittany and Kent left taking Mom with them. They were all going out to lunch together before dropping Mom off at the hotel. Brittany didnotinvite me to go with them.
All at once I was alone in my apartment again, just like before. But now, instead of just the general humdrum of life, I was so brokenhearted I could hardly think. Kent, the man I loved, was gone. And the worst part was… he didn’t even say goodbye. I thought we were in it for the long haul, that we weresomething. But he’d agreed to get back with Brittany so quickly that I found myself wondering if he’d ever cared about me at all. Was I just a couch to crash on to him? Just a warm body to play with until his life got back to normal?
I’d been so stupid, letting myself believe that Kent had changed, that what we had was real. But the moment Brittany showed up with her perfect hair and her practiced smile, he’dfolded like a cheap suit. No hesitation. No fight. Just a simple “Of course there’s nobody else,” and that was that.
I paced around the apartment, unable to sit still. Everywhere I looked, I saw remnants of Kent. There was a coffee mug he’d left on the counter, the indentation of his favorite spot on the couch, and the rustled covers on the bed where he’d slept beside me so many nights. I grabbed the blankets and tore them off the bed onto the floor where they lay in a heap.
My phone buzzed, and for a split second, my heart leapt, thinking it might be Kent. But it was just a client email, something about the new project I couldn’t bring myself to care about right now.
