"I want you to want me more than you want revenge," I whisper. "I want you to love me enough to let it go, not for them, for me, for us."
"And if I can't?" he asks quietly. "If revenge is too deep in me, what then?"
"Then we can't be together," I answer. "Then this is impossible, then we're stuck here, you choosing your past, me choosing no one, neither of us willing to bend."
We stare at each other. "I can't go with you," I whisper. "We're toxic for each other, we destroy everything we touch, this isn't love, this is obsession."
His jaw tightens. "It's both, it's love and obsession, I don't care which one it is as long as you're mine."
"But that's exactly the problem," I say. "You don't see me as a person, you see me as something to own, to possess."
"That's not true," he says.
"Isn't it? You threatened to chain me to your bed, to force me to have your children, how is that love?"
"Because I would rather have you hate me and be with me than love me and be apart," he says. "I would rather have you screaming at me every day for the rest of our lives than live one more day without you, that's how messed up I am, Iris, I'm not ashamed of it."
I stare at him, tears streaming down my face. "We can't do this," I whisper. "We'll destroy each other. Nothing has been simple since we got to know each other."
"Then we'll burn together," he says simply. "I don't care, as long as we're together."
"Ilay—"
"No," he says firmly. "No more running, no more hiding, you love me, I know you do, I can see it in your eyes right now, you love me just as much as I love you, everything else is just noise."
"It's not that simple," I say desperately.
"It is that simple, everything else is just fear talking."
I shake my head. "I can't go with you, it would be wrong for both of us."
His expression hardens. "Then you're coming unwillingly, but either way, you're coming with me."
"No," I say. "I'm not." I reach for the door handle, but he's faster, his hand shooting out, grabbing my wrist. "My love, don't," he warns. "Let me go," I say, trying to pull away. "I can't do that."
"Let me go!" I scream, and I start fighting him again, clawing, kicking, trying to break free. He grabs both my wrists with one hand, holds them above my head. "I'm sorry, angel," he says. "But I need you to trust me."
"Trust you?" I spit. "You're kidnapping me!"
"I know," he says softly. "I'll spend the rest of my life making it up to you, but right now, I need you to sleep." He pulls out a cloth and I panic. "No, no, please—"
"Shhh," he whispers. "It's okay, just breathe."
"Ilay, please," I beg. "Please don't—"
"I love you," he says, and then he presses the cloth over my nose and mouth. I try to hold my breath, but I can't, my lungs burn, eventually and I have to inhale. The world starts to blur. His face swims in and out of focus. "I'm sorry," I hear him say, his voice distant. "I'm so sorry, my angel." And then everything goes black.
Chapter 41
????
ILAY
I carry her inside the house, her head resting against my chest, her breathing soft and even from the chloroform. She looks peaceful like this.
The house is exactly as I requested. Massive and very isolated. Surrounded by dense forest on all sides. The nearest neighbor is miles away. No one will hear her if she screams. No one will find her unless I want them to.
Perfect.
