“Look, you have to give her time. The fact that you even exist the way you do is already too much for her to process. I don’t need to tell you how deep her abandonment issues go. You were there. I wasn’t. I only know the stories. But you saw it all firsthand, and you left her. You left her when she was terrified and vulnerable, and you think that ever just… disappears? You think she’s going to believe you’ll stay now? No. She’s not stupid, and she’s not healed, and you’re clearly smart enough—psychotic tendencies aside—to know this is going to take work.”
“I won’t leave.”
“Yeah, I got that,” she says flatly. “Listen, out of the two of us, she’s the rational one. I’d have probably stripped you of that V-card and made you swear your undying love before the condom even hit the trash. But that’s me. I’m a mess. She’s not.”
I arch a brow. “Are you sure about that?”
“Okay, fine. She is to a point. She could probably do with some help.”
“She’s had help.”
“Does it feel like it worked?” Lianna counters, and my eyes drift toward the ceiling—toward where she’s sleeping above us—and I don’t answer. I don’t have to. “Exactly… and honestly, I don’t think therapy will help. She knows her problems. She knows where they stem from, so really, it’s going to take a leap of faith from her.”
“And you think I’m that leap?”
“Fuck if I know,” she says, throwing her hands up. “Maybe. Maybe not. All I know is, on the outside, she’s stable, all business, and perfectly put together. But on the inside, she’s troubled as hell,and this is nothing I wouldn’t say to her face—I have said it to her face, actually—but I’m irrational in my best moments, so she probably doesn’t take my advice seriously.”
“She took your masked-stranger idea and fucking ran with it.”
“And if she hadn’t, you’d still be here jacking off to a camera feed, like some pussy-starved stalker lizard.” I start to laugh, and so does she, the sound slipping out before she can catch it. “Stop… I’m not meant to like you.”
“Well, I like you,” I say, because it’s true and because I’m sure it pisses her off. “And hopefully, one day we can be friends, or it’ll be awkward as hell when you’re her maid of honor.”
“Please, she’d never ask me. She knows better than to hand me a microphone at a wedding. Or put me in front of a crowd, period.”
“Neither of us has any family, so I’m sure she’ll just want something small.”
She squints at me, like she’s trying to figure out whether I’m joking or actually planning our wedding. “Jesus fucking Christ. You are… I don’t even know what you are. But whatever it is? You need to calm the fuck down and give her space. See if she reaches for you.”
“Yeah, I don’t like that idea.”
“Tough shit. It’s the only shot you’ve got at not fucking this up.” She picks up the knife before heading toward the door. “I’m going back to bed. Now, as weird as this has been, I hope you were actually listening. And while I’m staying here, back off. My secrets aren’t for your ears.”
“Are you sure? I can hook you up with twins.”
She stops mid-step, then looks back at me. “Seriously?”
“Yeah, they’re good friends of mine.”
“That’s not really the flex you think it is, considering you’re outof your fucking mind,” she says, continuing toward the door. “Oh, one more thing. Do you have her sketchbook?”
I say nothing.
“Yeah. That’s what I thought.” Her jaw tenses, and the humor drains from her completely. “She loves that thing, and I know you know that. So give it back.”
She flips me off with a grin and walks out, leaving me alone in the silence.
Chapter 9
Shannen
I’m pacing,but it’s not from nerves. Each click of my heels against the marble floors grounds me, centers me, and pulls me into the version of myself I’ve spent years perfecting.
Shannen Mitchell, CEO.
Here, I’m not the girl who held baggies of cocaine at eight, and I’m not the woman who lets a psychopath break into her apartment and touch her at night.In this office, with its floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking the city, I’m in control.
The clock on the wall suddenly ticks louder than usual, counting down the minutes until the meeting.
