I would not.
“Not happening.” I finished securing the last buckle on my chest and stomped to the closet, finding my boots there and digging out my pack. After tugging out the rest of my blades from inside the pack, I strapped them to my thighs and calves. Therewere never enough weapons in battle, and I wouldn’t charge into this one unless I was fully armed.
After looking down at my weapons, making sure I had everything I would’ve worn during a raid, I strode from the bedroom and out into the hall, my ladies fluttering behind me, moaning about how I was going to die.
If my people were, so would I.
I swung around to face them. “Stay in the suite and keep Farris safe. Lock the door. And hide.” With that, I shut the panel in their faces.
“My queen.” Surren thrust himself in front of me. “I’m afraid the king is not…available right now for visits.” A pulse ticked in his temple, and he kept shooting his gaze toward the hallway behind him.
I knew in my soul where Merrick had gone. He was fighting for our people. Defending what was ours. How could I do less when he'd shown me what it meant to lead not through position but strength? His place was on the front lines, and so was mine.
I breezed past Surren. “I’ve talked enough. Time to put my training to good use.”
“But—”
I didn't give him time to finish. Whatever he planned to say wasn’t a solution to this nightmare. That much, I could tell from his tone. His words clanged uselessly against me like a jangle of dropped coins.
I stormed down the hall and took the stairs with my guard streaming behind me, muttering things I had no interest in hearing.
I should remain in my suite.
Escape into the forest.
Go to the tower and lock the door behind me.
Hide, in other words. What use was a queen if she didn’t standin front of her people in their defense? Truly, I was not the type of queen they’d expected or were used to dealing with.
As I descended the stairs, the cacophony grew louder, swelling when I reached the foyer, where pandemonium greeted me. Staff rushed in every direction, their footsteps erratic and their arms full of paintings and ornate decorations. Their wide eyes darted around, their fear trailing behind them like shadows. They must worry the borgons would breach the castle walls and overrun us.
And Calista thought I should sit in the throne room and give direction? No way.
I stomped across the foyer in starts and stops to avoid being run into or slamming into one of them. When I reached the front door, I opened the one on the right before the guard could blink.
“You cannot go out there.” Surren thrust himself into the opening before I could step outside.
“Out of my way, Surren,” I growled, a hand on the hilt of a blade.
“Please.” His shoulders sagged but only for a moment before he stiffened them. “I can only protect you if you’re in a secure location, my queen. Please understand. This is my sworn duty.”
I pressed my face up close to his. “My sworn duty is to protect my people who are dying. Out of my way.”
“I can’t. The king?—”
“WhereisMerrick?” I lifted one brow. He would not sit in the throne room in safety while his people battled to protect this court. He’d be in the thick of it with his blades slashing.
I belonged at his side no matter where that might be. The realization had been slow coming to me, but it had settled into my bones. I had no interest in thrusting it out again.
I was his. He was mine. And when this day was through, I was not only going to tell him, but I was also going to prove it to him.
“The king is…” His gaze darted away from mine. “I’m sure he’s inside his suite. Would you like me to escort you there, my queen?”
Delay me, he meant. Maybe lock me inside Merrick’s quarters.
“He’s not in his rooms. Besides, you said he wasn’t accepting visitors.”
“He…” Surren didn’t try to lie—even if he could, being fae—and I respected him even more for that fact. “Yes, well.”
