I stared at my mother, seeing her for the very first time as me, the adult who’d believed she was never loved, that she was abandoned. She was pretty, but harsh lines had been etched into her face.
The loss of my father and fear for me and my sister had scarred her.
“I see many things,” Vera said sadly. “Too many that might or might not come true. But there is one path that’s thin and winding. Once stepped upon, it will bring her the joy of a lifetime.”
“Yes,” Mama croaked, tears falling from her eyes, droplets of sorrow for what she must know was coming. “Take her as close as you can to the start of that path.”
Aunt Vera tightened her spine. “First, the mark must be removed.”
Mother gasped but nodded, her tears flowing faster. “Howcan we hide it? It’s her heritage, the mark that makes her Lydel.” She lifted my dress, exposing my left thigh holding the symbol of Lydel Court. I’d asked about it once and was told I was born with it. All Lydels were.
“He’ll find her as long as she bears it,” Vera said.
“Layla?” I asked, missing my little sister. She always played with me, and we loved to hug. “Where’s my Layla?”
“As safe as she can be, child,” Vera said softly, rubbing my back. “We must do something, little one, and I’m so, so, sorry, but it will hurt and . . .” She looked up at my mother. “Itmustbe done, though this will also mark her for a lifetime. She will bear this with pain and sorrow forever. And once it’s done, we cannot soothe it.”
“Why not?” Mama barked, reeling away from Aunt Vera. “I can’t bear for her to suffer. Wemustlull her until it fully heals.”
“She needs the pain to strengthen her will.”
“That’s horrible.” Mama stiffened. “My daughter has the will of her father and the strength of her mother. We don’t need to brutalize her to ensure she is molded into the woman she must be.”
“If we don’t let her heal as the fates will, there’s a good chance she won’t choose the right path,” Vera said. “I’m sorry.I’lldo it. I can live with knowing I’ve done such a terrible thing, while you, my lovely niece, will be broken.”
“No,” my mother said. “I’m her mother. She’s my beloved daughter. If anyone must, it will be me who does it.” She stooped down in front of me and held my shoulders, her gaze caressing my face as if this was the last time she’d see me.
It is.
Who’s speaking in my mind?I asked, but only silence greeted me.
“I’m sorry, little one,” my mother said. “If I could take this burden for you, I would. You’re my precious love, my first baby.” She sniffed and lifted my gown. “Lull her. Please. Even a little for this part alone.”
A wave of Vera’s hand, and my mind stilled. As I was swirled away like fine mist on a morning-drenched meadow, pain seared across my left thigh.
Yes?the voice asked.
“What?” I sniffed and rubbed my leg that I’d cursed at least a billion times. Even now, it ached, the pain jerking through the memory of my mother’s face.
Yes?
“Yes what?” I asked.
Could you allow this if it needed to be done?
If this was my child, could I hurt her? Could I hide her away where she had almost no chance of surviving, where she’d feel rejection and sadness, knowing that one day, she’d have to storm forward and make her fury churn across this land to cleanse it?
“Yes,” I whispered, then stronger. “Yes.”
I was pulled down once more.
“You’ll keep her safe.” Vera’s words wretched through the pain swamping my mind.
“She’s sickly,” a big man said, scowling down at me.
I stood before him with blood trickling down my left leg, the pain of my deep wounds washing over me in heavy waves.So heavy, I knew they would drown me. Suck me down where I’d swim in my blood forever.
“Why would I bother with someone who looks like she’ll die?” he asked.
