I winced. “I’m trying, but she doesn’t always want to nap when its time to nap, and she’ll throw food at me if she’s not in the mood to eat.”
She nodded slowly, making a note on her little notepad before suggesting, “Consistency matters. Even if she doesn’t nap when she lies down, trying at the same time every day helps regulate her.” Her lips twitched like she was fighting as smile when she continued. “As for the food? That’s not grief. That’s just babies being babies. Keep offering it to her, and she’ll figure things out.”
I left the office feeling no better than when going in. It was nice to know Isla was healthy and that everything she was doing was normal, but I hated knowing she was sad. It still felt wrong.
Jasper seemed to agree. “This is bullshit. She’s a baby! She’s not supposed know what happened!”
“I thought the same thing,” I agreed. “Maybe the therapist can help. She’s a family therapist, so she knows about babies too.”
For the first time since I mentioned therapy, he didn’t argue or glare at me. He shoved his hands into his pockets and nodded, glaring at the ground. “Yeah, maybe.”
His agreement marked another first for us. For the first time since we met, we were on the same page. “Yeah. Maybe.”
CHAPTER ELEVEN
SIMONE
I half expected my next tutoring session to be just as chaotic as the first time I showed up. When I opened the door to my car, I listened for fire alarms or screaming babies. It was quiet, which was an improvement, and when I knocked on the door, Elias answered with a much calmer demeanor, a towel slung over one shoulder and a smile on his face. He looked tired, like he hadn’t slept much the past few days, but at least he wasn’t trying to burn the kitchen down.
“Hey, come on in.”
“Good evening… Elias.”
I didn’t often use a student’s parent’s first name, but he’d insisted and it felt rude to continually ignore his preferences. From the way his smile grew to stretch across his face, he appreciated the effort. It was wrong that I found that smile so charming. Not once in ten years of teaching had I ever thought of a parent as charming. There was just something about Elias that made me more aware of him.
I did my best not to let those emotions show on my face, following him to the kitchen where the table was cleared off and something was cooking on the stove. The baby was standing in her playpen, chewing on a ring toy and watching us curiously. It was an improvement from our last meeting where she’d been screaming, and while Elias went to get Jasper, I squatted in front of her to say hello.
“You look happier than when I last saw you. Has he stopped trying to cook nuggets?”
“No,” Jasper grumbled as he trudged into the room, looking just as unhappy to be there as last time. “Dude thinks all kids love nuggets for some reason.”
Elias grimaced. “Rooster said kids like them.”
“Rooster’s probably an idiot,” Jasper shot back. “Why would you take advice from some random biker?”
“He’s got way more experience with kids than I do,” Elias grumbled, plucking Isla out of the playpen and propping her on his hip. “The pediatrician said to let her move around more so we’ll be in the living room. The stuff on the stove is only keeping warm, but I’ll check it in a few minutes. You, uh… have fun?”
The way his face twitched like he was trying not to grimace had a small laugh escaping me. It surprised all three of us. Jasper looked at me like I’d grown two heads, while Elias looked elated. I shook my head, pointing to the living room.
“Go do baby duty. We’ll get started in here.”
He gave me a mock salute and winked at me as he headed into the living room to play with Isla. Jasper’s gaze shifted between me and his guardian, narrowed almost suspiciously, but I ignored him. Middle schoolers liked to find meaning in every interaction, and he’d just use whatever he came up with as an excuse not to study. I wasn’t going to give him that opportunity.
“Okay, today I’ve brought some of the material we worked on earlier in the semester. Since you weren’t here for that, I want to see how much you can remember or if your last school district didn’t hit things that we did. Answer all the questions without complaint, and I won’t give you any homework for the rest of the week.”
That motivated him to at least put in a little effort. He still rolled his eyes, but he put pencil to paper and started working without needing threats to motivate him. I figured some positive reinforcement might help since he’d been so combative lately. Technically, I wasn’t lying to him. The material was from last semester, just not for my class. I’d asked Mr. Karlsen, who taught 8th grade math, to give me some of his earlier work in the semester. If Jasper was as advanced as I thought, the material might not be too difficult for him to understand.
While he worked, I took in his appearance. He kept his hair short, so it was hard for most people to tell it wasn’t being taken care of, but I noticed how dry Isla’s hair looked earlier. Jasper’s was the same. Clean, but dry and messy. Isla especially looked like she was getting mats in her hair. That wasn’t good.
Dropping my gaze back to the paper, I tapped on the question he was working on with the end of my pen. “Read that one a little closer. There’s something you’re missing.”
He growled and grumbled, roughly erasing what he’d done, but I saw him read over the question again, and when he narrowed his eyes, I knew he figured it out. If I could get him to start being more diligent in his work, Jasper might be better jumping a grade in math at the very least. I wasn’t sure about the rest of his subjects. I hadn’t asked.
A babble drew my attention to Isla crawling into the kitchen, Elias creeping behind her in an army crawl, following but not stopping her movements. He looked adorable, following behindher with a patient smile, smirking when she looked over her shoulder and squealed when she realized he was there.
The difference between our first study session and now wasn’t night and day, but I could tell how hard Elias was working. Once Isla got distracted pulling herself up on her brother’s chair, he pushed to his feet and checked on the stove, intent on not letting it burn while he waited for Jasper to finish his work.
Jasper didn’t blink when Isla reached for him, just swept his free hand out and held it near her head, protecting her in case she overbalanced and fell so she wouldn’t hit her head on my chair. I scooted back to make a little room for her, and she turned at the sound, looking up at me with big brown eyes.
