No. I can do this. I can want her.
I dropped the whip to the floor, then shifted forward to press my bare chest into her naked back. But I wasn’t completely hard; my still mostly flaccid dick against her rounded bottom didn’t have the desired effect. I pushed my face into her thick, soft hair and let my lips brush the back of her ear. My nose wrinkled as the room’s air freshener intensified. It seemed to blow directly down on our position. The artificial Omega seemed heavier than the other scent notes now. Instead of forcing me into the illusionthat this woman wasn’t Beta, it only highlighted the stark difference. This woman could never be the match to an Alpha.
But not all Alphas are lucky enough to find the right one.
Fuck, we’d paid millions for a guaranteed match. Millions, and we remained Alphas teetering on the brink of ruin with no curative on the horizon. Maybe we should pay that back in kind. Maybe I should light a fire under Asher. Another company that needed punishing.
“Snap out of it, baby. I’m right here. I’m all yours.” Her voice pushed into my thoughts, just as she pushed her ass back harder against me, trying to grind against the cock that had little interest in her machinations.
Get your head in the game, asshole!
"Every inch of you is mine tonight," I forced the words out, trying to mean them. The syllables landed in her hair, upon her shoulder, and slipped down the length of her supple form. “You have no control. No say in how I touch you. But I can promise,” I placed both hands against her waist and brushed my palms up her sides, causing the sheer material of the babydoll to gather against my forearms, until my fingertips came to rest against the heavy, curved sides of her large breasts, “you'll come for me over, and over, and over."
Would she? Would she come when I couldn’t even get it the fuck up?
My voice lowered with each word until the last thing I uttered was barely audible.Fake it. Be dramatic. Convince her.The shiver that ran through her body was violent enough to rattle the chains above her head.
I could almost taste her anticipation on the air.
And yet, I frowned.
This should have ignited me. I should be hard as a goddamn rock. This beautiful, willing woman, surrendered to my control. The careful dance of dominance and submission that hadalways satisfied something primitive in me. The mental chess of calculating each touch, each word, each breath for maximum impact.
Instead, I felt hollow. Like an actor who had performed the same role so many times that his lines had lost all meaning. And it was fucking frustrating, because once upon a time, the script had proved magnetic. I’d lived for the part I played. Now, even donning the costume felt like a farce.
Iwantedto want this woman. To feel that surge of desire and power that had once come so easily. I didn’t act quickly enough. I didn’t foster the dying bird. Flight evaded me. Broken wings. Grounded. Too far from the sky above.
When had this happened? This disconnection? This sense that something fundamental was missing?Maybe it had seeped in slowly, a draft at the bottom of an older door, letting in winter’s chill bit-by-bit until the whole damn house froze.
The woman cleared her throat.
Bringing me back to the present, unsatisfying reality.
She didn't deserve to have her night ruined by whatever existential crisis I was experiencing. I pushed away from her body, moving around to face her. I used one hand to tease her womanhood, and I murmured appropriate words of praise and promise into the heated space between us. But my mind had detached, my dick gone dead.
Perhaps it was the predictability. I knew exactly how this would unfold—her increasing desperation, the moment I’d finally grant her satisfaction, her expression as I released her bonds and pushed her to her knees. I’d curl fingers into her hair, direct her mouth where I wanted it, groan as her painted lips worked my cock. I could already hear her cries as she came and her muffled, wet moans as she sucked me off. I could play the movie in my head before the previews finished rolling.
No surprises. No challenge. No risk.
Was that what I needed? Risk?
The safe, controlled environment of the club suddenly felt stifling. The red lights that had seemed atmospheric now struck me as artificial, theatrical. I could rip down the walls, revealing the man behind the curtain. And that man would be me—claiming to be some all-powerful wizard, but really a talentless man with no way home.
"Is something wrong?" The Beta woman had twisted her head, trying to see me behind her. Observant. I had paused too long. And she’d talked again. Goddammit.
"One more word from you," I replied, keeping my tone smooth despite the turmoil wrecking my insides. I wrapped one hand around her pussy, giving it a rough squeeze, “and I’ll leave you chained here until morning. Alone and unsatisfied.”
Her eyes visibly widened, and her breath hitched.Was her reaction real? Was it play-acting for pay? I couldn’t judge. I was acting too.
What I craved, I realized with sudden clarity, wasn't this simulation of connection. It was something raw. Something real. Something that couldn't be predicted or so easily controlled.
The thought should have disturbed me. Control was my cornerstone, the foundation upon which I had built my life and reputation. To desire its absence was... unprecedented.
I lifted her chin with a finger. Her eyes were dilated with desire, lips parted in anticipation of my touch. Beautiful. Willing. Utterly predictable. And now… the slightest taint of fear. And that woke the broken bird, just enough to flutter its wings and hover above the ground.
"Close your eyes," I commanded softly.
She shook her head ‘no’ and that defiance sent a thrill through me.
