Vampire speed was our friend.
Just as our heads cleared the ground, it closed.
Bel led the way down the stairs at a more sedate pace now, growling every so often on a different step. “It was just a damn arm.”
My chin trembled with humor. “Don’t say that to him.”
The king huffed. “What an asshole.”
“Or that.” I cleared my throat. “How about you let me do the talking? It might help this go a lot smoother.”
With ten more stairs descended, Bel muttered, “That’s fine. Just do not let him wrangle us into smoking anything. Lord Cato was correct in that warning.”
I snickered behind him. “Any other warning I need to know?”
“His dogs,” Bel cautioned suddenly. “Donotgo near them. They can run faster than a cheetah and have teeth sharper than a vampire.”
“That sounds like a party right there,” I mocked. “Tell me, when you met him, did you smoke with him and pet the pooches?”
“Not the dogs. But, yes, on the other. There are no words to explain that experience.”
“Switch places with me,” I whispered.
A door was finally in view at the bottom.
It was a little hard to maneuver around each other with our backpacks on in the cramped space, but we managed with minimal grunting and complaining on our part. I brushed my hair out of my face, straightened my back, and finished walking down the stairs with decorum.
I stopped in front of the door and knockedsoftly.
The door opened instantly…and smoke wafted out.
The smoke was so thick I had to hold my breath from fear of suffocating on the heady and gray cloud.
I waved a hand in front of my face to see through the haze, but it wasn’t much better. I could barely make out a druid who was at least seven feet tall and had short black hair, skin whiter than pearl and dark black eyes.
I held out my hand and dared to breathe, saying, “I’m Queen Gwynnore. Are you Lonzo?”
He shook my hand, his palm softer than silk. “I am, your majesty. I wondered when you were going to knock out there. I never would have answered for the prick behind you.”
“Yes, he can be trying at times.” I chuckled quietly. “Or most times, depending on his mood.”
He waved his right hand in a gesture for us to come in. “I’m extremely curious to know what has brought the both of you to my doorstep.”
Bel and I walked inside his home.
I kept my perusal short but invasive.
His spelled underground home was as large as a city block, the entire area open. The black stone walls moved, each stone constantly rearranging itself, like an impossible jigsaw puzzle. All the normal furniture for a bachelor pad, but with the added bonus of twenty motherfucking Chihuahuas sitting directly in the center of the room, the entire pack staring right at us.
I waited for him to close the door and ignored the fact that the door instantly disappeared and turned into a mark of the ever-changing black rock wall.
I stated seriously, “Lonzo, I would like to purchase something from you.”
His head tipped to the side, and he drawled, “Unless it’s my body for sexual pleasure, which you may have for free, your majesty, I no longer do business with Royals. One particular cunt ripped off my left arm when he felt the deal was dirty.”
“As charming as the sexual pursuit sounds—thank you for offering, by the way—I am currently taken.” I smiled with sugar and sweetness. “You’ve never worked with me before. I’m told I’m much friendlier to deal with than the others.”
That wasn’t true, actually. I’d been told many times in the past few days where I couldshove“insert whatever I needed”where the sun doesn’t shine. Such a lovely term that.
