“I can’t do anything about the babies we never got to have, but if you want more babies, Caity. We can adopt some babies. There are thousands of children out there who don’t have families. We can still be a family, Caity. You, me, Maddie, and Henry.”
Cian leaned forward and hesitantly pressed his lips to mine. My heart was at war with itself. The mother in me said to push him away, that if my daughter wasn’t happy because of the choices I made, then I shouldn’t be either.
But the other side of me, the selfish side, wanted him to kiss me. Wanted him to hold me and never let me go. My hands fisted his shirt, still unsure of what the right decision was.
Then Cian made it for me.
His hands slid over my hips to my ass, and he grabbed me, lifting me off the floor onto the counter. My legs spread on their own, making room for him to move closer.
I could feel him pressed against my core. He was hard, and the memories of our night together overruled my mother’s heart. His lips pressed more firmly, seeking permission.
Without thinking, I opened for him. My legs, letting him press harder against me. My mouth, allowing his tongue to swipe inside, tasting me.
And my heart?
For the second time in my life, I was selfish. I made a choice for me, and the rest of the world be damned. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer. His groan, as he moved his lips down my neck, caused me to shiver.
He was hungry for me. For years I’d denied us both the one thing we wanted. Each other. Well, I was done denying myself. Done denying him.
“Take me to bed, Ci.”
“Fuck yes.”
He lifted me off the counter, and I wrapped my legs around his waist. He carried me down the hall into his bedroom and laid me gently on the bed.
“Get naked,” he said as he stepped back and unbuttoned his shirt. I quickly pulled my shirt over my head as I watched him undress. He kicked off his shoes and dropped his pants, taking his hard length in hand, stroking himself as he watched me.
I shimmied out of my jeans until I was left in my bra and panties. Then, I sat up and reached behind me.
“Wait,” he said. He took a step toward me, and my eyes were on his dick. His finger under my chin lifted until I was looking in his eyes. The arrogant smile told me he knew what I was thinking, but he shook his head. Taking my hand, he helped me to my feet.
“We have all the time in the world, Caity.”
Then, his lips were on mine again, while his hands roamed over my body. A gentle, barely-there presence made my body shiver. One finger traced the edge of my bra over my breast. Dipping under the lace to flick my nipple.
Cian pulled back and smiled before pulling the cup down and taking my nipple into his mouth.
“Ci, please. Just take it off.”
His only response was a hum against my skin. We weren’t kids anymore; I didn’t need foreplay. I needed him inside me. I needed him to make me feel the way I felt that night.
“Patience,banphrionsa,patience.”
I had no patience. I didn’t want to be played with; I wanted to be fucked. Hard. By him. I’d waited a lifetime to be with him again, never believing it would happen.
I growled at him, and he laughed. He knew what he was doing to me. He reached behind me and removed my bra, then kneeled in front of me and, achingly slowly, pulled my panties down my legs.
“Sit,” he commanded.
I dropped to the bed and his hands were at my knees pushing them apart, moving closer. My breath hitched when his palm pressed into my skin between my breasts and he pushed me until I lay on my back. He lifted my legs and hooked them over his shoulder as he hummed his pleasure.
“So fuckin’ perfect,” he whispered and then leaned forward and licked me. My breath sped up. I hadn’t been touched in years, believing I would never have this again.
My hands went to his hair and pulled him closer. He chuckled against me, but I ignored his arrogance. I was being selfish right now. I didn’t care what he wanted, only what he could give me.
Nolan had never done this for me. Sex with him was clinical. He’d tried to get me pregnant again, but I made sure I never had his child. Something inside me always knew Maddie belonged to Cian. Even if she’d had Nolan’s blood running through her veins, she was always Cian’s child.
Conceived in the love we shared but never said out loud.
