“I’m not. I want you. I’m surprised by it as much as you are. But I don’t know if I can go all the way, and I don’t want to tease you.”
“Stop.” King brought his hand to my cheek. His thumb rubbed over my bottom lip. “Fucking tease me, baby. I want you to take what you want. What you need. We’ll stop when you want to stop. When you decide.” He curled up close to me, and his hand slipped around to the back of my neck as he kissed my lips briefly before falling back and putting his hands behind his head.
I bit my lip and sat up on my knees, scooting closer to him. His eyes never left mine as I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his. I put one hand on his chest to anchor myself over him as I deepened the kiss. His mouth parted and gave me entry, and my tongue tentatively reached out to his.
I could feel the muscles in his chest tense as he held himself back. Giving me full control. I leaned in further until my chest lined up with his. He groaned, and his chest rumbled with desire.
“I love you, Grace.”
I moved my head from side to side, looking for just the right angle, getting more frustrated by the second. I wanted him to take control. I didn’t know how to be the aggressor. I knew how to receive pleasure, not how to give it.
Without thinking, I swung my leg over his hips and sat on his stomach. Finally, I’d found the place I wanted. I held his face in my hands as I kissed him and nipped at his bottom lip.
My body began to heat up as my hips moved of their own accord. I was naked under his shirt. I could feel the hair on his stomach brush against me, and I rolled my hips, seeking out the friction I needed to calm the storm rising up inside me.
I trailed my lips over his jawline, and down his neck. Taking bites of his skin, before soothing it with a lick of my tongue. I sat up and looked at him. His hooded eyes pierced mine. His hands were fisted in his hair as the muscles in his forearms bulged.
He was holding back. I wanted him to touch me, but I knew he wouldn’t. Not yet. Not until I could prove to him that I wasn’t afraid. I’d never been afraid of him. It was the memories that haunted me. Whether I was sleeping or awake, the reminder of what I’d endured tormented me.
My hands roamed over his chest, feeling the muscles ripple as he held himself still.
“If I asked you to touch me, would you?”
“No,” he rasped. “Not this time.”
I rolled my hips over his abs, and he groaned and closed his eyes. His hips jerked upward involuntarily, and I smiled. He was losing control, and I was the one causing it. I wondered if he knew how much it turned me on to watch him struggle.
I could feel myself getting wetter as he fought to maintain his composure. I knew that he could overpower me in an instant if he wanted to. The fact that he was holding back, letting me control his body as well as my own, healed a piece of my soul. He would never hurt me. He would never take from me what I didn’t offer him.
I slid down further until his erection was between us. His dick was hard, tenting his boxers. I pushed open the flap, letting him spring free. I wrapped my hand around him, and he hissed, but the tension in his body was from anticipation, not pain.
I stroked his cock, memorizing the feel of him. His eyes snapped open as he watched my hand for a moment before locking his eyes with mine.
“Condom?”
“No.”
“King,” I argued.
“No condoms, Grace. I don’t want anything between us.”
My hands stilled. He groaned and shifted his hips in protest. “I did the bloodwork with Kytten. But I haven’t gotten theresults.” I shook my head and released him. “I can’t... not without knowing.”
He closed his eyes and sank into the mattress. “In the nightstand,” he ground out, giving in to my demand.
I leaned over and opened the drawer. Seeing the unopened box of condoms, I tore it open and pulled one out. Tearing the wrapper with my teeth, I tossed it on the floor and placed the latex circle on the head of his dick. Pinching the end, I rolled it down his hard length.
I stared at his latex-covered cock and willed the fear away. Skinner hadn’t used anything. None of them had. With her father’s help, Kytten had given me a full exam a few days ago. We were waiting for the blood test results. All I could do was pray I was safe. But until I knew for sure, I wouldn’t risk him.
“Stay with me, Grace.”
I shook my head, trying to clear the thoughts that wanted to distract me. Now was not the time. I eyed King’s chest. My gaze focusing on the rippled muscles, the colorful tattoos. The way his chest rose and fell in time with my own.
I wanted this, and I wouldn’t let them take it away from me. I wouldn’t let them win any longer. I wanted to take back what was stolen from me. What was stolen from King. I lifted myself up, hovering over him as I stared into his eyes. Eyes filled with hunger and desire. But also love.
Love for me.
I closed my eyes; I couldn’t watch the emotions cross over his face. Fear, anxiety, guilt—it was all there, but it was there because of the love. He was afraid he was pushing me too fast; he was anxious that I would lose my shit and break down. And he felt guilty because he thought I was doing this for him.
