Me:I’m glad
Beth:What are you up to?
Me:I’m at PAWS. Tidying up. Not keen on this manual labor lark
Beth:Ha! Are you hot and sweaty?
Me:Very
Beth:Send me a selfie
Me:God, no. I’m disgusting
Beth:Ohhh, now you definitely need to send one!
My lips curve up. I open the camera, frame myself, take the shot, and send it to her. My tee is stained with sweat and dirt, my face is flushed and streaked with dust and bits of grass, and my hair is sticking up and damp with sweat. I look gross.
Beth:OMG
Me:lol what?
Beth:You look AMAZING
My heart lifts.
Me:Well thank you
Beth:So hot
Me:It is warm out today
Beth:No, I meant sexy. You are one incredibly sexy man
I close my eyes against the bright summer sunshine, letting her words sink in. I need to take it for what it is—a beautiful and well-meaning compliment—not a step on a ladder to a relationship with her.
Me:Thanks, that’s a lovely thing to say
A minute passes, and I assume she’s thinking about how to reply, but eventually she comes back with a looooong message.
Beth:You’re welcome. Just want you to know that last night was very special for me. I appreciate you being there for me as a friend, and as a lover. It was comforting and made me feel better, and it was just fantastic. I hope you don’t regret it, because I don’t. I just need some time to process everything. Is that okay?
I read it, half-thrilled, half-disappointed, knowing I can’t expect more than that from her. She wasn’t going to sleep with me once and declare she loved me; it doesn’t work like that. The best thing I can do now is give her time.
I’m so fucking noble; I want to punch myself in the face.
Me:Of course it’s okay. You know where I am if you need me
Beth:I do, thank you <3
I study my phone. I want to end on a positive note.
Me:BTW I think I’ve got myself a dog!
Beth:Oh!!! From the Ark?
Me:Yeah, Cullen rang this morning. She came in yesterday
Beth:The Spoodle?
