His smile is so full of happiness that it makes me glow, too. “Of course. First things first, though.”
He sits up, reaches for our water bottles, and encourages me to drink most of it while he does the same. Then he says he’s going to close up the house while I use the bathroom. When I come out, the house is dark and quiet. He’s retrieved my top and bra, and our clothes are placed on the chair. I climb into bed while he goes into the bathroom, and I sit there hugging my knees, my head whirling too much to form sensible thoughts.
When he comes out and climbs back on the bed, I resolve not to think about anything until tomorrow morning. Then, I can put all the puzzle pieces together and decide what this means and how I feel about it. Tonight, I’m not going to ruminate or analyze or dissect. I’m just going tobe.
He pulls the duvet over us, turns me over so he can cuddle me from behind, and wraps his arms around me. “Can I get you anything?” he asks.
“No, thank you. I’m good. I’m amazing, in fact.”
He sighs and kisses my neck.
Through the open curtains, I can still see Orion in the sky. My archer, watching over me. I consider myself a modern, independent woman, and I have no wish to be with an overbearing, controlling man. But there’s something about being with a guy who’s caring and protective like this. I kind of like it.
My eyelids drift shut, and in less than a minute, I’m asleep.
*
I sleep soundly all night. I don’t wake fully, and yet somehow I’m still aware that every time I stir, Archer strokes my back, and a fewtimes he kisses me or my hair. I turn over, but I remain in the circle of his arms, enjoying his closeness, and I’m conscious that we stay that way until the morning.
*
When I next open my eyes, the room is full of light.
I don’t move for a while. I’m lying on my stomach, head turned toward the window. The curtains are still open, and the sunshine pouring through is lemon yellow. It must be just after sunrise, so around seven a.m.
I can feel Archer pressed up against me. I lift my head and turn it the other way. He’s lying facing me, one arm slung low over my hips, the other tucked under his head. His eyes are closed, and he’s breathing slowly and rhythmically. He looks younger asleep, as if the cares and worries of the day haven’t yet sunk their claws into him.
He’s so handsome. Last night, I was conscious as I explored his body that he was more muscular than I expected, but today in the sunlight I can see the curve of his muscles, and how tight and developed they are. He clearly works out, but he does it like everything else—quietly and without fanfare. He’s so different from Jude.
There’s something eternally boyish about Jude. I’m not particularly attracted to a guy’s wealth, but Jude’s still-large student loan is a symbol of his carefree attitude, both to money and to life in general. He’s untidy, as if he’s always expecting his mother to clear up behind him, because when he was at home, that was what she did. He can’t cook anything more adventurous than Spaghetti Bolognese and that’s only when pushed; he’d much rather order takeout. In his spare time he likes gaming and hanging out with his mates. When I’m with him, he makes me feel like we’re a couple of students barely out of uni, even though he’s thirty, and I’m twenty-nine.
It’s odd because I realize now that Archer is the same age as Jude, but he feels so much more grown up. I’m sure he’ll have paid off his student loans, and I know he can cook because he’s talked about various dishes he enjoys making. His house is clean and tidy, he has a new car, and I’m convinced he’ll have savings in the bank. Jude sometimes teased him for being what he called ‘ible/able’—responsible, reliable, respectable, dependable. He used to say he’d rather be ‘ing’ words—exciting, thrilling, interesting. But I like howArcher acts like an adult. And I like how he makes me feel grown up, too.
My stomach flips, though, as I think about what Jude will say if and when he finds out about me and Archer. Last night, it was easy to tell ourselves that Jude and I are over, and so I’m free to sleep with whomever I chose. I still believe that. But it doesn’t change the fact that the two of them are close friends, and Jude is bound to see it as a betrayal on both our parts.
I need to pee, so I carefully move away from Archer, letting his arm drop onto the duvet. He stirs but doesn’t open his eyes, and I roll over and sit up.
Last night, he put my clothes over the chair. My jeans are hanging upside down, and something has fallen out of the pocket onto the floor. I frown and bend down to pick it up. It’s the pendant Jude bought me for Valentine’s Day, the one I took off when he broke up with me.
I turn the heart over and look at the inscription on the back. ‘Love J x.’ I swallow hard, feeling as if everything has turned upside down. How can things have changed so much in such a short time?
My phone’s not there, and I remember that I left it on the coffee table in the living room. I nip in there and pick it up, then go back to the bedroom and into the bathroom. As I walk inside and close the door, I touch the screen. Immediately, I see a notification. It’s a text, from Jude.
A wave of panic rolls over me. I go over to the toilet and pee while I bring up the message. He sent it this morning just after six a.m.
Where are you? I think we need to talk.
My heart thuds, and I have to swallow hard to stop the panic overwhelming me.
I get up and wash my hands, wishing my brain wasn’t as fuzzy. I need to think clearly, but I feel as if I’ve been coated in treacle.
As I dry my hands, my phone buzzes with another text.
I’ve messaged Isla and Kim and you’re not with either of them. Where are you? Now I’m worried. Please, Beth. Let me know you’re okay
My palms and forehead are cold and clammy. I could just ignore him, but that’s being cowardly. So I text back.
I’m okay. I went for a drink at The Driftwood. Archer found me and I spent the night at his place
