I didn’t even have the strength to nod.
“Alice is truly a delight,” she continued. “I have seen the way you look at her, Jon. Whether you will confess it or not, you do like her.”
“No. I do not.” I stood from the sofa in one swift motion. “And nor does she like me.”
Joanna scoffed, a glint of amusement in her eyes. “The circumstances are not desirable, but you mustn’t pretend as if the two of you will be at odds forever. Miss Kellaway is to be your wife, not your enemy.”
As it seemed, she was soon to be both.
I ignored the rest of my sisters’ remarks as I prepared to call upon the Kellaways. I respected Edmund too much now to leave him waiting or to put him in the awkward position of defending his sister’s honor. If I gave too much thought to my decision, I might flee Brighton and never return. Miss Kellaway had implied that I wasn’t a gentleman. Proving her wrong would bring me no small measure of satisfaction.
I swiped my hat from the table in the entry hall, positioning it over my head as I walked out into the crowded streets. The swiftness of my proposal would surely come as a shock to everyone involved, but waiting was not an option. My mind was made, and the faster I could put the matter behind me, the better.
I shushed all thoughts of the future as I raised my fist and knocked on the front door of the Kellaway residence.
I tried to hide the urgency from my movements, but the moment the butler opened the door, I plowed forward into the house. My heart beat fast against my chest as I walked toward the open drawing room.
The image of Miss Kellaway in her soaking wet gown, with her hair plastered to her forehead, eyes ablaze, was very different from the version of her that greeted me behind the door. She stood beside the settee in a dry green gown, hands twisting together in front of her. Her auburn hair was also dry, forming soft curls. Her expression was difficult to read.
I tried to keep mine the same.
Her brother stood nearby, arms crossed over his chest. “Mr. Croft.” Edmund bowed, and I returned the gesture.
“Mr. Kellaway.” I swallowed hard, turning my attention to his sister. Miss Kellaway.Alice. Soon to be my wife. I searched her face for signs that she was pleased to see me here, performing my duty, but her features may as well have been masked in stone.
I hardly knew what to say next. I had never proposed to a woman before. I imagined that a private conversation first with her brother would be appropriate, if only to explain the circumstances. “May I have a word?” I addressed the question to Edmund.
He nodded, and I felt Miss Kellaway’s gaze on my back as we left the room, burning a hole through my jacket.
When we reached the empty corridor, I cleared my throat. “Have you been informed of the…circumstances?”
“I have.” Edmund’s brow creased with a scowl. “Lady Cinderford paid us a call.”
I looked down at the floor with a nod. “I hope you understand that my intentions were only to rescue your sister before any harm could come to her. As your acquaintance, I felt responsible to deliver her to safety. But after all that has occurred, I understand that her reputation is in question, and so I have made the decision to offer for her.”
Edmund listened quietly, crossing his arms again. If I were not also as broad and tall as he was, I would have been deeplyintimidated by his stance and expression. He was silent for a long moment as he chose his words. “You are a good man. I am sorry that you feel bound to this decision. However, I don’t think the matter is urgent enough to demand an immediate proposal. If you would prefer, we might see how the gossip is managed in the next day or two. It might give you more time to prepare, as well as provide time for our mother to return to Brighton.”
“I don’t need more time.” I averted my gaze. “The outcome will be the same.”
Edmund nodded slowly. He seemed to know, deep inside, the same thing I did. Waiting a day or two would only make matters worse. “I should hope the outcome includes the future happiness of both of you,” he said.
I ignored the hopelessness in my stomach. “I should hope for the same.” It was all I could say if I wished to sound polite. How could I be happy with a woman who simultaneously used me for my fortune and hated me?
Edmund took a step back and gestured at the drawing room. “I will allow the two of you a moment for a private conversation.”
I thanked him with a brief nod before turning toward the door. My heart pounded with sudden nervousness. Before I could lose my courage, I strode into the room.
Miss Kellaway sat alone on the settee. She glanced up at my entrance, slowly rising to her feet. Already, her face was flushed—with anger or embarrassment, I couldn’t quite tell. Only a few hours had passed since I had been dragging her to shore on that beach, yet it didn’t feel like it had actually happened. It felt like a nightmare, and I couldn’t shake myself awake.
“Did my brother demand that you marry me?” Miss Kellaway’s voice broke through the tense silence. “I will not ask you to do it.” Her shoulders were stiff, her head held high as she looked at me.
I took three long strides toward her, which seemed to catch her by surprise. Her hard facade crumbled for a moment but was swiftly replaced with a scowl.
“I don’t expect you to ask me,” I said. “Usually, it isn’t the woman who proposes to the man.”
She took a deep breath but said nothing.
I crossed my arms. “She might, however, do something to encourage his affection. She might also organize an ambush. Both of which are effective methods for securing the proposal she seeks.”
