“I-I can handle this, but I don’t want them to know.”
“Them being your family who loves you?”
She nodded.
“Because you don’t want them to see their girl is hurting, don’t want them to see you looking vulnerable and beaten.” He knew his guess was accurate as her eyes shot to him, then away.
“Jake and Branna have the baby, and Mom and Dad are excited about their first grandchild and I don’t want to worry them.”
“The niece you haven’t seen yet?” Cubby said, remembering Jake’s worry about why Katie had been avoiding him. “You realize that if you keep avoiding them, they’ll simply get on a plane and come here, don’t you?” He’d always been jealous of the McBride family; they’d loved each other unconditionally, unlike his.
“Don’t let them, Cubby.” Her good hand grabbed his arm. “They can’t see me like this.”
“No, they can’t. That’s why you are going to take a shower, get some sleep, and then you’re coming home with me.”
“No.” She shook her head, her eyes desperate now. “I can’t go back there yet.”
“Katie, I’m taking you home to Lake Howling, so get used to the idea.”
The tears fell faster, and Cubby wondered just how many demons Katie McBride was trying to outrun. He wanted to hold her, tell her he’d been where she was and that with help she’d come out the other side. It didn’t matter about the history between them; first and foremost she was his friend’s sister, so he’d do what he could to get her through this.
“It’s okay, baby.” He brushed her tears aside and she leaned into his hand. “Everything will work out, I promise.”
“No”—she shook her head—”don’t make that promise, because it can’t and won’t.”
He slipped an arm around her shoulders and she resisted, but he simply pulled her closer and held her.
He’d kept tabs on her; it would have seemed strange if he hadn’t. Jake had given him reports, told him she’d excelled at the police academy, and pretty much everything else. She’d come home once a year, and he’d only seen her twice in the first two. He’d waved, she’d nodded, but nothing more had passed between them, because they were uncomfortable with each other after what had happened before she left.
“It will,” he whispered into her hair. “You’ll get through this.”
She didn’t respond, but he held her close until the cab stopped. Cubby paid the driver, then followed her silently up to her apartment. It wasn’t the worst address, not the best either, but after the clean open spaces he was used to, it felt claustrophobic to be closed in on all sides by apartment buildings.
He took her key and opened the door after she missed a couple of times getting it into the lock.
“Your cleaner call in sick?” The place was a mess, Cubby realized as he walked inside. Clothes and takeout containers everywhere. It wasn’t a big space anyway, just a small kitchen/dining, separate bedroom and bathroom. It was so cluttered the walls seemed to close in on him here too.
“I’ve been busy.” She was standing inside the doorway with her good arm wrapped around her waist. The crying jag and vulnerability were behind her, and in their place was a woman on the defense.
“Get in that shower and wash the stench off yourself, Katie.”
“I don’t take orders from you, Cubby.” She was trying to get a glare going.
“Sure, but the stench on you is making me want to puke, so go wash it off or I will.”
He leaned back against a wall and folded his arms, simply to stop himself from reaching for her. She looked haunted, her eyes empty, face leeched of color. All the life had been sucked out of Katie McBride, and Cubby knew it would be some time before it came back. She didn’t speak, just turned and left the room. Seconds later he heard the shower running.
“Jesus,” he whispered, pulling out a chair and falling into it. He mourned the loss of the vivid girl he’d once known before taking out his cell phone and finding Jake’s number. Inhaling, he released the breath slowly as it rang. The next few minutes weren’t going to be easy.
“Hey, Jake, it’s Cubby. Sit down, bud, I need to talk to you about Katie.”
He’d finished the call by the time she returned in a pink fluffy bathrobe. Her eyes were clearer, which told him she was sobering up, and probably had the beginnings of a hangover coming on.
“I made coffee.”
“Thanks.” She turned to pour herself a cup. “Now you can go, Cubby.”
“You’ve certainly lost that home-town hospitality, princess.”
