Chapter Four
Josephknew Milly was fighting to keep her eyes open, as she kept sitting upright and then slumping backward into him. What the hell was this woman’s story? She was not timid around him, as many supposed governesses would be. She was funny, and even on brief acquaintance he knew she was intelligent. That’s not to say a governess could be neither, just rarely around him. But then in the normal course of events, he would not be carrying a governess between his thighs.
She would have her hands full with the Wimplestow family. They were good people, just a little unorthodox, and their table manners made Joseph queasy. Yet, there was little doubt that Miss Wimplestow needed assistance if she was to enter society... a great deal of assistance, he thought, remembering when last they had met, she had been covered in mud after spending time with her beloved pigs in their sty.
He felt the moment Milly gave up the battle and succumbed to sleep. Her body softened against his, suddenly growing heavy as her muscles relaxed. Looking around her, he checked Mugwort was secured and in no danger of hitting the ground. Of course, a bump or two could surely only enhance such a challenged creature, but still Joseph did not like to see anyone hurting, even ugly little dogs. She was tucked securely in her mistress’s arms and in no danger of falling from them. Joseph then slipped her large bag from her wrist and pulled the ties over his shoulder, so it hung at his side.
The miles passed slowly, as he was reduced to a walk while Milly slept, not that he minded particularly. Holding a woman other than a family member while she slept in his arms when they had shared no intimacies was something he had never thought about, or indeed experienced, and why should he? It simply wasn’t something that had cropped up in his life. However, now he had firsthand experience, and Joseph had to say it was not an unpleasant one.
His thoughts returned briefly to the woman he had once believed would be his wife. The woman he had loved desperately, and who by now, God willing, would have given him children. He’d wanted to hold her in his arms many times, but society had allowed him to do so only when they danced, or shared a brief passionate kiss when they had managed time away from prying eyes.
Four years ago, she had broken their betrothal, and he had received no word of her since. Pushing aside the anger that came with thoughts of Millicent Lawrence, he focused on the woman in his lap.
He would likely never see her again, and had to admit that had been freeing. Speaking with her, he had been unguarded, as if for this one night he was just a man, and she a woman, and there lay no barriers between them. A strange occurrence, Joseph had to admit, but again, he had to also admit to enjoying it.
Milly had her legs sideways, but had kept her body facing forward; now, however, in slumber she was seeking comfort and warmth. Very soon her cheek was resting on his chest, the brim of her large bonnet connecting with Joseph’s chin. She made a soft breathy noise as she breathed out; the sound was ridiculously sweet. Pushing the brim back slightly, he looked down at her, attempting to get his first real impression of the woman. Her glasses were pushed up on one side, so he removed those as well and tucked them into the pocket of her jacket, and it was as his eyes rested on the long sweep of her lashes that he knew who he held.
It can’t be!
Lifting his eyes to the road ahead, Joseph grappled with the knowledge that Lady Millicent Lawrence was in his arms again. She had ruthlessly broken his heart, and then fled London with her true love, or so she had led him to believe. She had left behind an aunt who loved her, a father incapable of the emotion, and the society he had once believed she had loved.
Sucking in a cold breath of air, he looked down at her once more.
He studied the sharp jut of her cheekbones, searching for the lush young woman he had wanted to marry. She was there in the soft pale skin, lovely mouth, and beneath that bonnet, her hair would be the color of polished gold.
“Where have you been?” he whispered. The anger he’d believed had left him rose to the surface, so fierce it nearly choked him. She murmured as his arms tightened, so he released her. He was not ready to face her yet.
Her actions had shaken the foundations of his life, a life that, until she had left him, had followed its expected path.
“I liked the idea of one day becoming a countess. Alas, your father is a healthy man, and shows every sign of living for many more years,”she had said to him that fateful day she disappeared with her lover.
“If only you had waited, your wish would have come true,” he whispered.
Three weeks after her desertion, his father had unexpectedly died, ripping him adrift completely. He’d pushed Millicent from his head, and concentrated on his grieving family. He’d thought her gone, never to cross his path again. It seemed fate had other ideas.
Following the small rounded tip of her nose, he came to her lips. The bow of her upper lip was parted slightly in slumber. He remembered how they felt under his. Lifting a hand, he traced his middle finger over the outline; she wrinkled one delicate brow, but didn’t wake, so he did it again. Then cursed himself for being a fool. He shouldn’t feel this profound relief at knowing she lived. She was nothing to him now. Nothing and no one, only the woman who had betrayed him with another. Joseph could never forgive her for the hell she had plunged him into.
He had ignored the niggle of doubt that had crept into his head four months ago, doubt put there by the arrival of papers on his doorstep from her father. He had told the deliverer that he would not see Lady Millicent again, nor ever wished to. But the man had insisted he take them, and so he had. Joseph remembered clearly the words written on the note he had opened.Find it in your heart to forgive my daughter.Those eight words had caused him to think of her again, and wonder if she had really not loved him after all. Now he had found her cold and alone, looking nothing like the lady who had left him, which increased the niggle tenfold.
Greyton appeared before them as Joseph walked Monty up the last rise and into the courtyard, where he eased them to a halt. He felt a tug of pleasure as he always did when he came home, but his pleasure was tarnished by the woman he held. He’d tamped down his anger to a slow simmer over the miles, but it was still there. He had many questions for her, the main one being, where was the man she had left him for? For now, he would not let her know he had guessed her identity, because if he did, he believed she would run again, and he did not yet know what he wanted to do about her, if anything. He had something to tell her, something that he should tell her now. But Joseph needed time, and only when he was ready would he impart the knowledge that sat heavy on his shoulders.
“Oh, I seem to have slept the entire journey, my lord. I-I’m terribly sorry.”
Milly roused in his arms and sat up. He steadied her as she quickly turned from him to look at the house.
“Your glasses are in your coat pocket.”Not that you need them.
She pulled them out and placed them on her nose.
“Why are we here, my lord? I-I thought we were going to the village of Stonleigh?”
“This is my home. It’s cold and late. The morning will be here soon enough to get you to the stage.”
Joseph sat quietly as she studied the front of Greyton. The grey walls had darkened with age, and rose three stories above them. It had been built hundreds of years ago by his ancestors, and had seen many changes, but still stood proud today. The sturdy stone facade could be seen for miles, and was a landmark for many. Joseph knew each corner and room intimately. He, his brothers, and his sister had run over every piece of land, and ridden to all corners of the estate. This was home, the place he had wanted Millicent to be mistress of.
“No.” Her head shook from side to side. “I-I cannot stay here.”
Swallowing back the bitter thoughts, he instead said, “Too late, we are here. Now we shall eat, and then I’m sure you would like to spend the rest of the night in a comfortable bed.” Lifting her off his thighs, Joseph placed her between his legs and then swung himself out of the saddle to the ground. Lowering her sack, he then held out his hands.
