“Think hard on it, Ariana. Can you actually look at our relationship and tell me I’m not your Alpha?”
“That’s ridiculous.”
He’s not been my Alpha.
He hasn’t.
Except…
He eased me while I was in heat.
He supported me through everything, but challenged me when I needed it.
He formed a pack and didn’t let his jealousy keep me from developing relationships with them.
He’s been my safe space.
They all are.
“A Beta could have done those things.”
He grunts, dismissing my statement.“But it wasn’t a Beta doing those things. It was an Alpha who knew from the beginning that you were his. Every choice I have made as an adult was made with you in mind. Our house has a nest, Ariana. An entire room filled with all the gifts I couldn’t send you because I had no idea where you lived. We all took classes on how to care for an Omega because we wanted to make sure that when we finally got to meet you, that we would be the pack that you deserve.”
I have no idea how to respond to any of that. I don’t have the emotional bandwidth to address how those things make me feel.
Instead, I lash out. I’m not typically so bullheaded, but it’s easier than examining how his admission makes me feel.
“I never asked you to do those things for me! I never asked you to be my Alpha.”
“You didn’t have to!”I can hear his panting breaths, recognize the tone he always takes when we argue.
Except this isn’t an argument over a ghost-hunting show.
This is my life.
“I never made a conscious decision made to put you above all else. I just did. It has been killing me not to ask where you live, knock on your door, and tell you everything these past few years, but I didn’t want to rush you. I wanted you to come to me and say you were ready. When we were told you applied for this show, I took that as you being ready to take the next step.”
“I didn’t apply for this!”
“I know that now, but at the time, I didn’t. It doesn’t change anything, though. I love you so much, and I knew that there was no other Omega out there for me. I was so scared when I presented as an Alpha. I didn’t want to lose you. Icouldn’tlose you. So I lied, knowing it might mean I would never be able to meet you in person. But that was okay, as long as you were in my life. I’ll take any part of you you’re willing to give me, Ariana. You’re my Omega, and you always have been.”He sounds choked up, like he’s crying, and I find myself aching to hold him in my arms.“And if you never love me back, that’s okay. As long as you’re happy, I’ll deal with whatever the consequences of this lie are.”
Sometimes, my brain and my heart are perfectly in sync.
This is not one of those times.
My heart bulldozes over my brain, taking the reins.
“I love you too, Derrick.”
Audience Reactions
EPISODE FIVE
brittneedsbooks>Knot What You Expected
AHHHHHHH how could they end the episode like that? What do you mean we don’t get to hear how he reacts to her admitting she loves him? WHAT DO YOU MEAN? Do they hate us or something?
floofymoose>Knot What You Expected
