My cheeks are on fire. “Not really. How about a question from the audience?”
The Beta man throws his head back with a laugh, right along with the audience. “Fine, fine. Let’s take our first question.”
Bridgette grabs a card from beside her on the couch. “This one comes to us online, from user ‘maybe.beta.baby’. They want to know, ‘How did Derrick and Ivan react to the story Ariana told Grant about Calvin?’” Bridgette turns toward the audience. “This is, of course, in reference to the emotional moment between Ariana and Grant, where she talked about her last moments with her brother. I know that was a hard conversation to have, and it has sparked a lot of debate online about the need for laws allowing death with dignity.”
That conversation with Grant has been used on social media as a jumping-off point for others to tell their stories. Even some people with terminal illnesses have weighed in, advocating for more states to pass legislation allowing death with dignity. Of course, plenty of people don’t agree with it, but that’s no surprise.
Ivan pulls me tight against his side. “She told us about it not long after we left the house. It’s a story filled with grief that America has already heard and discussed countless times. I don’t think anything else needs to be said on it.”
“It’s a shitty question to ask, especially right out of the gate.” Derrick sits up a little straighter. “It’s like saying, ‘Hey, Ariana, good to see you. Want to talk about your darkest memory?’ Let’s move on, please.”
“Fair, fair.” Bradley holds his hands up, not forcing the issue. “Let’s go to the live audience.”
A crew member hands a microphone to a cute woman with dark curly hair and rich, deep skin. Hersimple red dress falls to her thighs. She looks terrified. “Hi, I’m Becca. My question is for Grant and Ivan. What was it like to meet Ariana as yourself for the first time?”
She sits down with an embarrassed swiftness and ducks her head.
“It was amazing and terrifying. When we first talked, and I realized that I was in love with someone who had no idea who I was, my heart broke a little.” Grant crosses one leg over his knee and plays with the string at his shirt collar. “It felt like I had studied for a test, and when I sat down, it was on an entirely different subject. I wasn’t expecting her to fall into my arms right out the gate, but the fact that there was no recognition at all weighed heavier than I expected it to.”
“I felt a bit like a stalker.” The crowd laughs at Ivan’s interjection. “She’s terrified of Alphas, and here I am popping up in front of her like, ‘Hi, I love you, and I know you don’t like cantaloupe.’ I’m honestly not sure why we thought the show would be a good idea.”
“There are still some things that I’ll say, and I’ll forget that they already know it. It’s hard to keep it straight.”
Ivan bumps his shoulder against me with a playful smile. “We humor her and pretend like it’s the first time we’ve heard it.”
Bradley and Bridgette gesture for another audience member to ask a question. The man takes the microphone and directs his question to Derrick.
“I wasn’t exactly rooting for you through the season, and when it was over, I still didn’t feel like you’d earned her forgiveness. Do you think you have?”
Derrick looks like a deer in the headlights. My normally confident, charming Alpha knew this was coming, but he’s freezing up in front of the camera. He’s soconcerned that people will take their frustration at him out on me for choosing to bond him.
I don’t give him a chance to answer.
“I think he has, which is all that matters, right? I know there are a lot of people out there who say they could never, but you don’t really know that. You won’t unless you live it. But Derrick didn’t assume I would forgive him. In fact, he was convinced I wouldn’t, and he took steps to protect me if I didn’t want to be with him.”
Bradley’s eyebrows would hit his forehead if he didn’t use so much Botox. “And what steps did you take, Derrick?”
Grant places a reassuring hand on our Alpha’s bicep. “Tell them.”
“After I left the house, I began working with a clinic to donate and store my pheromones. I wanted to create a stockpile for Ariana, so she didn’t have to worry about FOS if she didn’t want to be with me.”
“Oh my God.” Bridgette’s voice is breathy with emotion, and she clutches her chest. “That is so moving. How did you react when you found out, Ariana?”
“I, uh.” I stumble over my words. Ivan hands me a bottle of water that was resting on the table beside him, and I take a greedy gulp. “No one wants to think about something happening to the people they love, but for years, it was all I thought about. Death terrified me, and I locked myself away so I didn’t risk it. When I found out Derrick had been going through pheromone extraction to make sure that, even if the worst happened to him, I wouldn’t meet the same fate as my brother, I felt like he had faced death for me. Like he bought me more time. I hope I never have to use them, because I made all three of them promise I could die first, but knowing that he wanted a way to take care of me, even after he’s gone?” He pulls myhand to his mouth and places a sweet, reassuring kiss on the back of it.
“Knowing that he did that for me just reminded me of why I fell in love with Sax in the first place. It gave me a new lease on life.”
We get peppered with questions from the raunchy to the strange for the next hour. One guy wanted to know Grant’s skincare routine, and another asked Ivan if he ever considered voice acting.
“We have time for just a few more, so let’s check the live feed.” Bridgette accepts a piece of paper from a crew member and reads it outloud. “Okay, this one is from Wilson, a Beta from Wyoming. He wants to know what was in the letter from Calvin.”
I was waiting for that question. I’ve been practicing what I’m going to say, how much I’m comfortable sharing.
Derrick speaks before I can even open my mouth. “Next question.”
Bradley, quite used to Derrick refusing to answer questions at this point, rolls with the punches. “I know everyone wants to know about the final challenge. Ariana, when you spoke directly to America in your room, our viewers said they felt like they were your friend in that moment. Tell me the truth. Are you pissed at us for giving you that challenge?”
“I mean. Kind of?” Nervous laughter from the audience wasn’t the reaction Bradley was expecting based on his expression. I’m not sure why, considering it was the most controversial thing that happened this season. They’ve gotten a lot of flak for even asking it of me.
