Page 19 of First Loss


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“Who will protect you at every hour of the day?”

I shake my head, refusing to answer.

“Tell me who else would give their last breath for you, and I’ll leave you the fuck alone.”

My spine tingles because I know there isn’t anyone who would do those things. Elliot isn’t the savior type. Thea lovesme eternally, but she has a baby now, a husband.

There is only one answer, and it kills me inside.

“Why? I’m not your problem, and I don’t even know if this guy is dangerous.” I avoid his gaze, launching up from the couch to rifle through the linen closet. “It’s not like you bothered to check in over the last ten years.”

“Eleven years. Three months. Six days.”

My lips part, and I can’t force them back together. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

“A lot, probably.”

“Whatever.” I throw a spare pillow and blanket across the back of the couch, ignoring them as they bounce and fall onto the ground. “I’m going to bed.”

“Have you told your fiancé yet? I didn’t see your lips moving as I was following you home.”

Yeah, I was too busy watching him behind me on his Indian Motorcycle. “I just got laid out and filleted in front of everyone in Thea’s living room because someone won’t leave me alone. Can I have a minute to process all of this?”

“A man should know if his woman is in trouble.”

“He’s busy, I’d rather get it straightened out before I worry him.”

“Bullshit.”

“Excuse me?”

“That’s bullshit, and you know it.”

“You don’t have the right to an opinion.”

“Yeah, and what does Thea think? Does she think your fiancé should be here?”

“Don’t,” I warn him. “You don’t get to pretend to be on a little team with her. You aren’t even close to her level.”

“Well, someone needs the unconditional truth from you,not the sugar-coated shit you were trying to pawn off on Malec.”

“She knows everything about me. She knowseverything.” I glare at him pointedly so he knows what I mean.

“You told her all about us, huh?”

“Of course, I did. She’s my best friend.”

“I used to be your best friend.”

“Until you left me!” I scream, smacking my palms against my bedroom door. “You were gone, and Thea picked up the pieces! She took me in and loved me like you never could. She stayed! Through everything!”

He doesn’t move as I crush him with my words.

“Every milestone. Every heartbreak, every terrible fucking thing that happened to either of us. She couldn’t push me away, and I wouldn’t let her! Because that is what best friends do. You left!” I jab my finger into his chest, and he takes it, staring at the contact.

“You don’t get to come back into my life and pretend that you care about me. You aren’t allowed to! Not after you threw me away like garbage!”

“That’s not fair,” he thunders, knocking me back a step. It’s calm but stern, and it only fuels me. I love a fight.