I glance over my shoulder to see a small smile appear on her lips as he pushes me away. Pointing in the direction of the locker rooms, Sebastian deposits me inside when we catch sight of the man I’m here to see. Llewellyn knows I haven’t been medically cleared to work again, but I wanted to come see him, anyway. A lot has happened, and I want him to know how much I appreciate him trying to help me all those weeks ago. I also need to apologize for going MIA on him and not letting him know sooner about my accident.
Sebastian pats my shoulder, leaving me next to a bench, then walks back out to the gym area. I wouldn’t be surprised if he found his way back to the pretty redhead at the front counter.
“Colson, my boy,” Llewellyn greets, extending a palm to shake mine. He drops down into my space and gives me the best hug he can with the hunk of metal under me. “Wasn’t sure when I’d see you again.”
I drop my chin. “I know, I’m sorry I didn’t call you sooner.” After my accident, I waited a full two weeks before I called with the news. So, to him, it appeared like I just stopped showing up.
He sinks down onto the bench nearby. “Don’t fret. Your aunt called to let me know what was going on.”
I just stare at him because I had no idea she did that. Then again, it’s not that hard to believe. Aunt Bess has always had my best interests at heart. Now is no different, I guess. But also… “You didn’t mention that during our phone call.”
“I didn’t?”
“No.” I let out a laugh.
“Wanted to keep ya on your toes a bit.” I shake my head at him. “Ya know, help you learn from your mistakes and all that.”
I hum in response.
“Have you?”
“Have I what?”
“Learned from your mistakes.”
I suck my bottom lip into my mouth and make sure I’m looking him in the eye when I say, “Yeah, I have. Turns out rock bottom wasn’t what I thought it was. All those weeks ago when we talked about it…I thought I was there, but there was still room to fall.”
He crosses his arms across his chest. “And? Did it hurt when you finally landed?”
I motion to my body. The very one that’s still healing. “What do you think?”
“I think you never go through stuff unless you’re meant to learn some kind of lesson from it. It’s those experiences where you gain wisdom, Colson.”
I understand that now. I sacrificed my own happiness for a long time because of it. But I’m done doing that now. I’m ready for a new beginning. One that includes healing, Violet, and everything in my life that feels good.
Curiosity gets the best of me. “How long did it take you to pick yourself back up when you hit?”
“It’s not about the time it takes to get back up,” he explains with a contemplative gleam in his eye. “It’s about what you make of yourself in those moments and what comes after the resurrection. It’s about what itgivesyou.”
“Yeah? What did your resurrection provide for you?”
He looks at me for a long moment then stands. I almost don’t even think he’s going to give me an answer until his hand falls on my shoulder and he gives it a reassuring squeeze. One that I only ever thought I’d get from a father growing up yet comes from the man who has always given me his kindness and time.
I don’t recall ever really choosing Llewellyn that first time we talked. Not that it matters because he chose me. He chooses every person who steps foot in this place. And for the first time in my life, my mom’s struggles feel like a blessing. In some odd way, despite all the heartache and grief it caused, it gave me this man. A person I would’ve never known otherwise. A person who has helped me understand that I don’t have to be what I came from, that I can rise from the hardships a brand new person and do it in a way that brings peace.
I glance up when he doesn’t immediately answer. I’m met with his cauliflower ear and the side of his meaty neck. It isn’t until he shifts his chin down that I notice the mistiness in his gaze. “My resurrection gave me Gulliver’s. It gave me every single person who has stepped foot inside since I opened its doors. And…it gave me you.”
His words simmer in the form of a rolling boil inside of me when he heads back out into the main gym area. Not because I’m angry or anything. Outside of the little family I have and Violet, I’ve never had a person admit how much of a blessing it is to have me in their life.
My heart staggers, nearly face planting in my chest from the impact of his admission. I sit there and take it, allowing the love from his words to consume me in a way I normally pushaway. I relent, surrender, and accept it for what it is while telling myself it’s okay. I’m deserving enough to have people out there who care about me. People outside of Aunt Bess, Sebastian, and Uncle Thad.
When the door swings open a minute later, I expect to see Sebastian ready to wheel me back out to the car. But it’s Eli who does a double take, ignores me, and makes his way over to one of the lockers.
After my accident, I never did get a text or call from him asking how I was doing. It was radio silent where Eli was concerned, and I’m beginning to see how okay I am with that. Because I don’t want people in my life who turn their back on me as soon as life gets a little fucking hard. And I certainly don’t want someone who has ties to Tommy Lescaro in my corner. Not after the dude put a hit out on me and burned my trust to the ground.
“I don’t even get a hello?” I ask, resting my good hand on the wheel of my chair. “Or a, wow, glad to see you’re alive?”
He pops a locker door open, his tone emotionless when he repeats back, “Glad to see you’re alive.”
