Nyx huffed an incredulous laugh. “This world is so fucked.” Her voice was scratchy, and a pang of guilt hit his chest like a stone. At least she wasn’t coughing any more. “So when you go all blue and icy, it’s him. But when you’re this,” she waved. “You’re just–”
“Brooks. Just Brooks.”
For better or for worse, the asylum changed him. He was no longer a nameless god roaming the darkness. He had become Brooks, and Brooks had a range of emotions he didn’t quite understand. Brooks was the part that felt lonely while watching his creation laugh and love, indulging in a companionship that’d never been on the table for something like him. That was the part that longed to find companionship among the broken, just as he had with Lytta. Perhaps, even, with Nyx.
Chaos grumbled his disapproval, but Brooks pushed him to the side.“Go take a nap you fucking grouch.”
“The world will be so happy to hear that that empty chest of yours finally holds a bleeding heart,” she sneered. “Make sure to let them down easy when you announce you’re only here to avenge two people.”
Nyx plucked a weed from the ground and busied her fingers pulling it apart. Her body vibrated with tension. He watched, but didn’t say anything as the storm brewed.
“I knew you wouldn’t be worth it.” Her lip culled as she plucked another weed from the ground. “Even when I prayed at your altar I knew it was for nothing.”
Brooks simply nodded and looked out over the river where the stars reflected on its surface. “For what it’s worth, Nyx, I’m sorry.”
“Save it for someone who gives a shit.” She was silent for a moment before she turned, disdain dripping from her pursed lips. “I was raised in that fucking temple. My entire life was spent in service to a creator who was so bored with us he went to sleep.” Nyx threw her hands up in the air with a sardonic laugh, tears glistening silver against her violet eyes. Her voice raised with each sentence along with her fury. “I was taught that the single most powerful being in the universe gifted Gaia and Uranus the power of chaos and let them pass it down to their children. They charged priests with keeping a fellowship to pass their knowledge down through centuries, hoping that if there were still people left to make sacrifices to the great God of Chaos, he would grant us mercy when he returned to raze the Earth and rid it of evil.”
She stood then and paced, fists clenching like they were begging to strike.
So much wrath, Chaos whispered.
“They built two temples inyourhonor. Sacrificed innocents inyourname. Daemon starve and die on sacred ground all while pleading at your altar to grant them mercy!”
“I never asked for sacrifices, Nyx. I never required it. I gave this world my power and expected nothing in return.”
“Oh.” Another wry laugh. “Is that supposed to make me feel better? It didn’t matter that you didn’t ask for it because it happened anyway and you didnothingto stop it.”
Brooks opened his mouth to argue, to tell her that it wasn’t his place to see to every whim and plight, but she didn’t stop.
“My entire life was planned around my death. I was raised like an animal for slaughter, and it meansnothingto you!Those fanatic priests were going to slit my throat and pray as my blood soaked your feet. But I wasn’t going to die in the name of a stupid, worthless god who wouldn’t help.” Nyx stopped pacing and pointed her finger at him, jabbing it forward with each blow. “Instead I decided to say fuck the priests, fuck this stupid religion, and fuck you.”
Brooks bowed his head. Even Chaos had nothing to say.
“My death at your altar was not going to feed them, or keep them clothed. It wasn’t going to make sure they had money to pay Ares or prepare their homes for the winter. If they resent me for it, that’s fine. At least I know they’re alive.” She swallowed past the lump in her throat, voice shaking as she pinned him with her glare. “I love this village, and I love these people. I woulddiefor them. But I will not die for you."
“You saved me.”
Those words echoed through her blood and wove themselves into the very fabric of her being. Xia didn’t know how long she slept. It could have been minutes or dragging days, but her body ached like years had passed. She wasn’t ready to wake and face the Devil. She wanted to hold onto the dream of Brooks for just a while longer.
A quiet, steady pattering filled the space and she reached to pull her fluffy duvet to her chin. When her hand grasped only air, she froze and awareness flooded her system. Her breath caught as she opened her eyes to the thinnest of slits, but she was met only with darkness.
The air smelled dank and musty, assaulting her nose and sticking to the back of her tongue. The atmosphere felt completely at odds with the bed she rested on. The bed felt as ifit were made of clouds— soft and yielding to every curve, its hold as gentle and warm as a caress.
Xia strained her ears hoping to hear anything that may tell her where she was. There were no voices. No thumping bass lines from Club Hel or rushing currents whooshing along her glass wall. Nothing but the soft patter of water in the distance.
It was… peaceful.
She opened her eyes wide and was immediately taken aback by the unnatural darkness. There was no filtered starlight or stray beams of sunlight through water. For a moment, Xia feared she’d been swallowed by a void and was forever doomed to live in its infinite darkness. Until, however, she caught swirling tendrils moving within the blackness.
Xia reached out a tentative hand. What she intended to do, she didn’t know. Wave the darkness away as if it were smoke? Or perhaps determine whether the wall was solid or more fluid? What she met was neither.
Her hand brushed against swirls of shadow that flowed against her skin like watercolor paint. She watched in awe as it floated through her fingers and wrapped around her arm. The surrounding darkness hummed as it continued to caress her pale skin, and something in her chest squeezed. The shadows felt like… home. As if they’d been missing from her heart and finally found their way back to wind around her soul.
Xia reached her other hand out and more inky tendrils slinked from the mass. Her skin prickled as the shadows moved lazily along her body, teasing and exploring her like a lover. She’d never known shadows to feel like anything, but these?
They felt likeeverything, moving against her skin lightly like the softest of fingertips. Others were more firm like the brush of lips. The feeling made her heady and she lost herself in the touch of those shadows.
Xia was so caught up that she failed to recognize the cold seeping in or the uncomfortable sharp points of the hay sticking through the makeshift cot. She didn’t feel the drops of rainwater atop her head from the faulty thatched roof, nor did she see the figure standing in the doorframe.
