We spent the evening alternating between throwing axes and eating way too much food. At one point, some of the hands who worked over at Black Hat were seated at the table next to us, leaving Shannon seething where she sat. I leaned over to Zoe, who was sitting next to me, to ask what was going on.
“The woman who owns the ranch is a rival. Well, not really, but she has a huge grudge with Shannon and I can’t figure out why. They breed different horses and have different clients, but Becca can be a real bitch and she just makes Shannon furious,” Zoe said.
“Whatever we’re planning, I’ll drive,” Fiona said, giving her sister a hug.
“Whatever you’re planning, you better not,” Sofia said waggling her finger at Fiona. “Do not make me have to lecture my friends on why crime doesn’t pay.”
I laughed when I saw Fiona’s attempt at an innocent expression. “I swear by my pretty floral bonnet that I would never do something like that,” Fiona said blinking her eyes slowly.
“That’s not how the quote goes,” Sofia said.
“Well, if I recited theactualquote, pretty sure you’d be pulling those handcuffs of yours out. Not that that’s a bad thing, but I’m just not into you in that way,” Fiona said making everyone laugh.
The guys from Black Hat were loud and boisterous and for a little while, there was a not-so-subtle attempt to out noise them, but the enthusiasm was waning fast, so we decided to call it an evening. We all had to be up early anyway, so we paid our tab and left, all of us confirm that we wanted to come here again before I returned to Austin.
I followed Fiona to her car since she was giving me a ride home. I had to admit that I had a great time tonight. I was sure there were ax throwing places in Austin, but I’d never bothered to look. But I also didn’t have a large enough circle of friends there to make going there fun.
When I first arrived here in town, if anyone said that I would like living in Poplar Springs, I’d have told them they were crazy. But with the exception of my mother and her friends, this small town that I grew up in was proving to be what I needed right now and I had no idea how to react to that.
Now if only I could get Brian to relax his need to tightly control everything and spend more time with me, living here would be pretty close to perfect.
TWENTY-TWO
BRIAN
“What smells so good?” Caitlin asked as she came down the stairs wearing leggings and a short T-shirt.
“In here!” I called out as I continued unpacking containers of barbeque and all the sides. “I stopped by Charlie’s Pride on my way back from Beaumont this afternoon. I don’t think it was around when you lived here. Try it.” I held up a piece of grilled chicken with a sweet and spicy dryrub on it.
I should have set it on a plate or used a fork but before I could stop her, she leaned forward to take the meat, her lips wrapping around my fingers in a way that had my dick slam to attention, pressing against the zipper on my jeans. Caitlin didn’t seem to notice.
“Oh, that is good,” she said. “It reminds me of that place we used to go to in Austin. What was it called? I haven’t been there in years.” She reached for another piece of chicken and popped it in her mouth, humming with satisfaction. I grabbed the counter, squeezing it.
“I, uh, can’t think of the name either. Something like Smokin’ Butts.” There were dozens of barbeque places in and around Austin and most of them had punny names, but watching Caitlin eat with her fingers was making it damn hard to remember anything with all the blood rushing south. “Should we take this into the living room and see what’s on TV?” I didn’t wait for her answer and scooped up some of the containers and brought them to the coffee table.
Caitlin followed with her own stack of containers and I could’ve sworn I saw a smirk on her face when she set them down. I frowned, abruptly wondering if she’d done that on purpose. If that was the case, thengame on.We got settled and I grabbed the remote. “Funny or serious?” I asked when I pulled up the Peacock app.
“Definitely funny. Should we continue rewatchingParks and Rec?” she asked and I queued the next episode.
While we watched the show and ate, I had trouble taking my eyes off Caitlin. She looked so at home sitting on my couch. Like she belonged here. I wrestled with my desire to have a relationship with her. I could easily lose myself being with her, and I worried how much that would impact my duties to the job and the town.
I needed to focus on what mattered. And currently it was the gorgeous woman sitting next to me. When we finished eating, I took the containers back to the kitchen to put the leftovers away. When I got back, Caitlin had the next episode ready to go. She was attempting to get comfortable without getting too close, but she was struggling.
That wouldn’t do.
I laid down on the couch, stretching all the way out, and pulled Caitlin down to lie in front of me. Tucking a pillow under her head, I leaned my head on my hand so I could see the TV.
“Are you sure about this? I can move over to the chair if you want the couch to yourself,” she said quietly. I could feel her tense shoulders.
Wrapping my arm around her waist, I kissed the top of her head. “Nope. I’m good if you are.” She didn’t answer, but she didn’t have to. Her body relaxing against me was answer enough.
We watched the next three episodes in this position and I couldn’t describe any of them. Lying here with Caitlin in my arms was both comforting and frustrating. It felt right. All of it. The way she fit in my arms. How her head rested against my chest. How relaxed she felt. While I loved my house, this moment with her felt more like home than anything else I’d ever experienced but it wouldn’t last. It couldn’t.
It wouldn’t be fair to Caitlin. I knew that deep down but I couldn’t resist basking in what ifs. What if things could be different? What if we could have everything we both wanted? What if Henry was right and Santa Claus was real? I gave myself a mental shake. I couldn’t contemplate a future where we both got what we wanted. There didn’t seem to be a way forward.
We had now and that was it.
I tightened my arm around her and tucked a pillow under my head. She shifted so we were sharing the pillow. When her breathing started to even out, I couldn’t resist stroking her soft skin where her T-shirt rode up.
