“How about the kitchen,” I said, and she nodded her agreement.
Excusing myself, I left Caitlin to set the table and went to take a hot shower. I groaned when the pulsating water hit my tired muscles. When I first bought this place, I had to redo some of the plumbing and had chosen to install massaging showerheads. I appreciated it now as I stood under the hot spray, feeling myself relax for the first time today.
I was reluctant to get out, but I also knew Caitlin was waiting for me. Toweling off, I pulled on my old UT sweatpants and a T-shirt and joined her in the kitchen. “Wow, that smells amazing.” She’d set the table and our plates were laden with slices of steak, roasted potatoes, and what looked like Marc’s legendary corncakes. My stomach growled loud enough to echo in the kitchen, making her laugh as she set a frosty bottle of 4 Noses porter in front of my plate with a flourish.
“Shall we eat?” she asked.
I collapsed into the chair with another groan and took a long sip from the bottle, enjoying the taste. With all the hours I’d been keeping at work, I hadn’t had a beer in more than a week and it felt good hitting the back of my throat.
We both dove into our food and I’d cleared nearly half my plate before I could bring myself to pause long enough to speak. “Wow, I was definitely hungrier than I realized.”
Caitlin was watching me eat and she had frown lines that I had the urge to brush away. “Did you eat anything at all today?”
I had to stop and think about my answer. I vaguely recalled grabbing a hotdog but I couldn’t remember if I actually ate it. There had been a scuffle at the port-a-potty, and…oh yeah, I’d ended up tossing the dog when the stench hit my nose.
“Well, I meant to,” I admitted. I changed the subject. “I didn’t see you at the rodeo. Did you work all day?”
“Some of the other workers wanted to attend, so I offered to hold down the fort,” Caitlin said. That didn’t feel right to me but before I could say anything, she continued. “It wasn’t that busy. Other than Mitch and Charles, the only orders we had were for Marc’s to-go sandwich boxes. Tomorrow, Marc askedfor everyone to come in early to help put the sandwich boxes together to sell at the rodeo, and then he’s going to close the diner for the day so we can all attend. Isn’t that nice?”
“It is. Are you planning on attending?”
“I don’t know. I mean, it’s not something my parents would attend, but…”Their friends might, I filled in what she didn’t say. “So I thought I might stay home.”
That wasn’t going to happen. I reached for her hand and took it in mine. “If that’s what you want to do, darling, then fine, but please don’t stay away from the rodeo because you’re worried about whatmighthappen. My family will be in the stands cheering Cal on. I’d love it if you sat with them. The Caffertys will be there too. Lots of friendly faces.”
“I don’t know, Brian.”
I squeezed her hand, pleased that she hadn’t pulled away yet. “No pressure. If you decide to go, know that you’re always welcome in my family.” Caitlin turned her hand around to give mine a squeeze and gave me a small nod. “So, that’s a yes? You’ll go or at least consider it?” I didn’t want to jump to conclusions, and I wasn’t going to delve into how happy it would make me if she did sit with my mom and brother.
“That’s a yes,” she said with a small smile and I resisted the urge to cheer.
We finished our dinner, making small talk. I told her about some of the events I’d managed to catch. There was a pre-teen trick roping event that had had everyone in the stands cheering. I also told her about the livestock auction and how the auction caller narrated the escape attempt of a pair of emus, much to everyone’s enjoyment.
She laughed along with me. “Did they catch them?”
“Eventually. But it was touch and go for a while. One of my deputies got too close to one of their beaks and the onery bird tried to take a chunk out of his hand.”
Mack would be okay. He was more embarrassed than anything else. He’d jokingly referred to it as a “badge of honor” since none of the other deputies had a similar injury. Not that any else had been foolish enough to get too close to an emu.
After dinner, I was reluctant to leave the table. As exhausted as I was, it felt good spending time with Caitlin, and I didn’t want to break the happy bubble we were sitting in. But then her head dropped and she snapped it back up. I realized she was ready for bed, too.
Pushing back from the table, I set our dishes in the sink while she protested that she could do it. Then I pulled her to her feet. When she lifted her head to look at me, I wanted nothing more than to sweep her into my arms and carry her upstairs.
Forcing my desire down, I pulled her into a hug and kissed the top of her head. “Thank you for bringing dinner home for us, darling. I appreciate it—and you—more than you know.” I was the one used to taking care of people, which I enjoyed, but the fact she was concerned about me reminded me of how good things had been between us before I’d broken things off.
Reluctantly putting space between us, I steadied her before indicating the stairs with my head. “But we’re both about ready to fall asleep and we’ve got another big day tomorrow. So, up you go. I’ll see you in the morning.”
I watched her go up to her room and a part of me wanting to go with her. The idea of spooning her in bed while we sleptappealed way too much to me. I had to keep reminding myself that nothing could happen with her. Not if I wanted to protect my heart.
SIXTEEN
CAITLIN
Sunday morning came far too fast and I fumbled for the alarm on my phone. As tired as I had been last night, it’d taken me a while to fall asleep once I’d gotten into bed. I kept thinking about Brian. He’d been visibly touched when I’d brought dinner back. It wasn’t the first time I’d done that and he was always thinking about me around mealtimes, so why was this time different?
My backup alarm went off, which meant I was dawdling. Pushing myself up with a groan, I got dressed. Not hearing anything coming from Brian’s room, I tiptoed downstairs. Turned out, I needn’t have worried. The coffee was already made and he’d left a note for me letting me know he got called in early and he hoped I’d join his family in the stands.
“We’ll see,” I said to the empty kitchen. As I poured myself coffee and grabbed a banana, my thoughts all over the place. That was another thing I’d wrestled with last night. Brian and I weren’t a couple. At least not anymore. It felt odd to think of sitting with his family. Like I didn’t belong.
